Here's what i think Felaryans would watch if they had tv's.
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Cooking with Sam Episode 1*audience cheers as the fairy chef Sam steps out onto the stage*
Sam: Greetings hungry prey and preds mostly preds and please i swear to god if I see a pred eating a prey in the audience you'll be part of the meal.
*the audience goes silent*
Sam: And now onto today's show we'll be making neko's....Female of course *The audience cheers* into tasty treats, first a simple starter Neko kebabs, then we move onto the main course Roast neko and finally the dessert A nice cool Neko sundae.
*The lights go down and a total of sixteen bound neko's are brought out onto the stage*
*the lights then go back on*
Sam: And where back as you can see the neko's are ready oh so wonderfully unwilling to be a meal.
Sam: Now you may be wondering why there are sixteen well there's tn for the kebabs two for the roast and for for the sundae.
*The audience cheers and the neko's begin to cry*
Sam: Now before we go on i'd like to introduce my assistant.
*Ferona walks out on stage to join him*
Sam: The surprisingly hot and tasty and species confused elf FERONA!
*The Audience cheers*
Ferona: Thank you Sam *bows*
Sam: Now we'll be starting with The neko Kebab's so bring out the neko's
*Ten neko's walk out uneasily to the two*
Sam: Now if your a fairy like me the best way to do this is by shrinking them down like so
*the neko's shrink and Sam puts them upon the prep counter*
*The camera zooms in on this scene*
Sam: Now me and Ferona will first bind The neko's to these sticks.
*Ferona and Sam take a neko each both Tying them to a stick with ease*
Ferona: They look tasty at this size
Sam: That they do but were not done yet we still have to add the other stuff and then cook em
*The pair finish tying all the neko's to the sticks*
Ferona: Now you can add vegetables or other pieces of meat if you like to your neko Kebabs i shall be using the vegetables Ferona is cutting up now.
*The camera zooms to Ferona who is busy cutting up carrots, potatoes and other vegetables*
Ferona: There all done
*the camera shows the neatly chopped vegetables*
Sam: now you can add them to the Kebab's if you want you can make it so the neko's feet are resting on a piece of carrot like so
Sam: *puts a slice of carrot at the bottom of the kebab moving it up to the bottom of the neko's feet making it so it looks like a little platform beneath the neko*
*the camera zooms in upon the Neko Kebab*
Sam: and basically you can add the vegetables in anyway you like
*Sam and ferona set about adding vegetables onto the kebab above and below the struggling Neko's*
Sam: and there ya go one Neko kebab ready to be cooked
Sam: *holds up a finished neko kebab*
Ferona: mm
Ferona: Licks her lips
*Sam and Ferona both put the neko kebab's onto a fire where they turned and began to cook evenly on all sides*
Ferona: Now here's one of my favourite mains Roast neko.
*The audience cheers*
Sam: that is Ferona that it is
*Sam and Ferona both grab a neko dragging them out onto the counter*
Sam: mmm first you must bind there wrists together with what?
Ferona: Edible rope of course
*Sam and ferona grab there neko's wrists binding them together with strawberry coloured rope*
Ferona: mmm i like strawberry flavoured rope
Sam: now we do the same thing with there ankles
*Sam and ferona struggle to bind the neko's ankles together with the edible rope*
Ferona: hehehe now they won't get away
Sam: that's for sure
*The neko's hiss and one bites Ferona*
Ferona why you little
*Ferona raises her fist but Sam stops her hitting the neko*
Sam: don't hit the meat, gag the meat
Ferona: right
*Ferona and Sam both stuff Apples into the neko's mouths before positioning them in trays*
Sam: now you can add a nice glaze to the neko
Ferona: yeah mm a nice Honey glaze
*Ferona and sam begin to coat both neko's backs in Honey they continue until every inch of there backs is covered in honey*
Sam: and now to add the vegetables
Ferona: *has an evil grin on her face*
*Both neko's have sliced pineapple placed along there spines and cherry's placed in the middle of these. Then without warning they both shove a whole carrot into the neko's butts causing them to give out muffled screams*
*The audience laughs*
Sam: mmm smell those kebabs cooking
*The smell of the neko kebabs causes the chefs and audience to lick there lips*
Ferona: opens up the oven*
Sam: now earlier we set the oven to 32 degrees that should cook both neko's perfectly
*Sam and ferona both shove there neko's into the oven before closing the oven door*
Sam: and now to check on the kebabs
Ferona: *pulls the kebabs from over the fire each neko a golden brown colour*
*The audience licks there lips*
Sam: mmm mmm they look tasty now to let them cool and speaking of cool it's finally time for our dessert
*the audience ooh as an enormous dish full of ice cream is brought out*
Ferona: *sets the kebabs down to dry*
Sam: and this dish although tasty is actuallry simple to make just get the ice cream put in the neko's
*Sam and ferona lift the crying neko's into the ice cream*
Sam: now we add a wafer chocolate sprinkles and strawberry sauce
*Sam and ferona pour sauce over the neko's and ice cream then put on chocolate sprinkles on the ice cream and he neko's before adding a huge wafer to the ice cream*
Sam: There ya go
*Ferona takes the neko's out of the oven both are a golden brown clolour*
Ferona: ah cooked to perfection.
Sam; Well there ya have it folks a three course neko meal
*the audience cheers*
Sam: Tune in next time when we make stuffed Elf
Ferona: WHAT!
*the credits start to roll*
Voice over fairy: hehehe what a lovely show up next something for the kiddies it's the show everyone loves telenaga's.
Subject: Felaryan tv shows 
Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:53 pm
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RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!! 
However because it wouldn't last very long usually in that case the fairy gives you protection magic to protect her meal from being digested and from the fumes. Then she uses magic to speed things up and leaves the room temporarily to take care of business (I'll spare you the details) and the show continues.
