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| | Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) |    |
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Karbo
Evil admin
Joined : 08 Dec 2007
Posts : 1024
 |  Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!)  Thu Feb 14, 2008 2:17 am | |
| Wow what a kinky chapter 
Cynthia have better be carefull, each time she try this kind of plan, Reiko make a new giant friend XD |
|  | | Raetsu Lord Pichu
Veteran knight
Age : 20
Joined : 11 Dec 2007
Posts : 300
Location : Netherworld of the Usagiyasha
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Feb 14, 2008 6:41 am | |
| *wipes blood from nose*
Keh heh heh, a great chapter here my friend a great chapter indeed |
| | | | Spykeofkonoha
valiant swordman
Age : 24
Joined : 09 Dec 2007
Posts : 181
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Feb 14, 2008 6:48 am | |
| O.o! ...  wow... that was... FREAKIN' AWESOME!
The detail of the scene; the vividness of the mental images! I was captured and enthralled by the mental pictures you had put in my mind... and a little on the aroused side... good thing I was more hungry than turned on though... otherwise it would have been awkward.
Nah, kidding. It was still very good and I meant what I said. You're getting better and better with each chapter. Those little '~' marks you use are usually used to indicate a sort of sing-song tone in a person's voice. I take it that Reiko was more than likely a little playful each time she used that.
In any case, great job and keep it up. I can't wait for the next chapter Reiko-chan. |
| | | | Reiko
Roaming thug
Joined : 30 Dec 2007
Posts : 115
Location : Chidokai Forest
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Fri Feb 15, 2008 12:31 am | |
| | Spykeofkonoha wrote: |
Nah, kidding. It was still very good and I meant what I said. You're getting better and better with each chapter. Those little '~' marks you use are usually used to indicate a sort of sing-song tone in a person's voice. I take it that Reiko was more than likely a little playful each time she used that. |
Oh? the ~ are for sing song o.o I thought they were done for like, drawn out comments like
"Come on let me out~!"
in place of. "Come on let me outttt!"
or for like groaning ^^
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| | | | dreadis
valiant swordman
Joined : 30 Jan 2008
Posts : 221
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:51 am | |
| (looks for peroxide...)these blood stains are never going to come out
very nice no problems i could see but i wasn't really looking at the spelling doubt anyone was
also i thought thats what the ~ was used for too
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| | | | Spykeofkonoha
valiant swordman
Age : 24
Joined : 09 Dec 2007
Posts : 181
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Fri Feb 15, 2008 5:49 pm | |
| | Reiko wrote: | Oh? the ~ are for sing song o.o I thought they were done for like, drawn out comments like
"Come on let me out~!"
in place of. "Come on let me outttt!"
or for like groaning ^^ |
Hmm... I believe they can be both. It just really depends on how the tone of voice is described in the narrative portion.
Oh! I forgot completely! If they come before and after the dialog then it's sing song but if it comes after only then it's a drawn out sentence. Still, it helps if it's described in the narrative as well... to prevent people from going "Huh?" like I did. ^^; |
| | | | lami
valiant swordman
Age : 19
Joined : 12 Dec 2007
Posts : 203
Location : Around or inside someones tummy (hopefully garnets)
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Mon Feb 25, 2008 7:05 pm | |
| when it comes to grammar im <- a total noob
IIRC, when you want to draw out a comment though, i think its o-u----t
but like i said i have no idea what im talking about.
anyway, great story. I almost thought Reiko was done for. |
| | | | mikeimp
Temple scourge
Age : 17
Joined : 09 Jan 2008
Posts : 623
Location : waiting for an attempt to be eaten so i can pwn the predator in my badd ass Predator outfit!one!!11
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Feb 28, 2008 5:08 am | |
| | Reiko wrote: | Woof! Here it is! Chapter 6 that I have been waiting to write ^^ I feel so honored karbo helped me to capture the flavor of one of his characters!
The quest has been created and the cat-grils are gonna get it! Please enjoy!
I had to post it in two sections because of how big it was! heres part 1
Chapter 6
A stone?
Chapter 6
A stone?
It was morning, and Reiko was walking alone through the forest.
Reiko and her two pets had spent last night enjoying there food, Reiko and Cynthia delighted as their meals struggled and squirmed hopelessly as they processed their meals. Cynthia and Rieko were nice enough o go get that roasted slug for Kristen so she at least had something to eat last night.
Now why would Reiko be wondering out in the forest on her lonesome? Well Cynthia had her hand in that…just to mess with the poor dog-girl she lied and said that she saw adventurers walk that way…So Reiko decided to go do some quick reconnaissance on this…being the gullible puppy that she so is. Cynthia was also hoping the dog-girl would get gobbled up for it too.
She had been walking for a good half-hour, she had been wandering for a long time, completely aimless.
“Man I am so hungry~ Where are these stupid adventurers….”
The funny thing was there wasn’t supposed to be any adventurers, but ahead Reiko saw plumes of campfire smoke!
“Ahh! There it is! Hehehe lets go see how many of them there are!” Reiko said to nobody in particular as she scampered through the bushes, being ever so sneaky as she poked her head out of the large leaves to look out over at the band of cat-girls.
It was a large band indeed…must have been twenty cat-girls gathered around a burning fire. Three carriages arranged around the fire showed that this was a caravan. Reiko clapped her hands eagerly, drool pouring from her lips as she left the bushes and started to run back towards home.
Now this was one of her Reiko moments…Where no other sense mattered, where all she was thinking only about the meal…It might have been nice to notice that there was a teal scaled tail tip wiggling out into the opening. Like I said might have been nice…but she didn’t notice and Reiko’s foot caught the tip and she tripped.
“Eep!” She let out as she flopped onto the ground…those breasts of hers weren’t the best air-bags…for her face at least. She whimpers, holding her forehead. “Ouch~!”
Looking around she pondered what she tripped on…then it happened again…that familiar looming feeling and the dark shadow getting cast over her. Reiko began to perspire as she gulped, spinning around she saw a tall, beautiful naga.
She had soft, fair skin and a young innocent face. Her teal colored eyes gawked down at Reiko, they carried a sense of playfulness that Reiko had never seen in a nagas eyes before. The naga had hair that poured down her back like a golden river. She had such a supple, shining body that Reiko couldn’t help but be envious of. She stood some 75 feet tall…Or Reiko guessed, she couldn’t think straight now anyhow, let alone figure the height of the naga before her…Wait…blonde hair, teal scales, young and sexy…It’s Crisis!!
The naga smiled. “Why what do we have here?” She said with the most bubbly voice anyone could imagine.
“H-Hi?” Reiko said confused, slowly standing back up, the hair on her neck standing up.
Crisis shot her hand out with speed that stunned Reiko as she snatched the dog-girl up. Bringing Reiko near her face she looked the dog-girl over and blinked.
“Hey…Your ears are weird…your one strange looking cat-girl…” She said.
“Wait! I’m no cat-girl! Don’t even compare me to those filthy felines! I’m a dog-girl!”
“Dog-girl?” Crisis repeats and looks her over again. “Never ate one of those before…”
“Ugh! Good! We taste terrible! You know…what with um…rolling around int eh mud and…sniffing each others butt all the tiiIIIMMEE!!” She meeped as Crisis long tongue stroked across her head, getting Reiko’s hair matted from the gooey saliva and her face frozen in fear.
“Ooooo puppy tastes really good…”
“Wait! Wait-wait-wait! You’re a smart beautiful naga obviously! But come on…you can tell I’m a predator right? I mean look at me! I’m a predator…Predators can’t eat predators.”
Crisis blinks and giggles. “Hehehe that’s funny, you trying to trick me?…That’s the lamest one yet…Your to small to be a predator…Besides no one has ever tricked me…” she said then blinked.
Reiko growled ‘If one more person says that!!!’ she thinks before she speaks. “Well wait! There is a small camp- site near here! Wouldn’t you rather go there and eat! I mean I’m only one meal…There had to be like twenty back over there!”
Crisis giggled cutely. “Oh come on…Your just trying to trick me again…Nah I’ll go with the meal I’ve got.”
Reiko felt sick as she couldn’t convince the naga to not eat her. Struggling weakly she watched as the naga’s mouth opened up for her. Crisis’s tongue danced as Reiko was placed on top of it, the tongue slipping back into the maw with Reiko. The wet, saliva coated flesh of Crisis’s mouth was more then happy to accept Reiko. The dog-girl flailed around, struggling as she punched at the naga’s lips.
“Let me out! Please! Come on The girls might go on the move!” she pleaded, only to feel Crisis tongue slide up between her legs. Reiko let out a pleasured moan before the tip of the tongue whapped her in the face. Reiko tumbled over backward right towards the entrance of Crisis’s throat…all Reiko could think of was that this is the end of her…but as she looked up she saw Crisis uvula. Reiko made a gamble, shooting her arms out to grab hold of the dangling uvula. Catching it in her hands she squealed with joy, though as she tugged on the appendage, Crisis started to gag and cough…and like the dryad before, Reiko was pushed back out of Crisis’s mouth, flying into the air…but unlike the dryad Crisis put up her hands and caught her in her palms!
“Nice try doggy…Hey stop wiggling~!” Crisis said and grumbled as Reiko kicked and squirmed around, pushing against the fingers that tried to constrict her as she rolled out of the hands. Reiko flew down to the ground, gasping as she realized it was hard. Growling she slammed into the ground hard, right on her side as she gasped…this pain beated getting digested as she got up and ran right around Crisis, who gasped and started to follow Reiko.
Reiko panted, she could hear Crisis closing in on her with ease, Crisis’s large soft hands reaching out to grab her. Reiko meeped and rolled out of the way, running around the trunk of a tree, only to watch Crisis tail tip weave around the other end and cut her off. Reiko skidded to a halt just in time to watch the tail hammer the ground in front of her and she cut to the left.
“Damnit! I’m running away from the camp!” Reiko shouts, looking back to see Crisis’s playful face watching her movements….Crisis didn’t care about Reiko’s pleading, just the joy of the hunt.
Reiko kept running through the forest, diving into bushes, only to have Crisis’s hand come down and crush her cover. Reiko scampered out of the ruined braches every time and whimpers ‘she’s so fast and strong…’ Reiko thought and got worried. Continuing her chase she looked around the various holes in the ground, worried that there were dridders inhabiting them. It might be a good ploy to let a naga fight off dridders while she escaped…but it was just as likely she would be feeding herself to the dridders and handing Crisis over like a free meal…or Crisis gets away and Reiko gets trapped!
“Gya!! What the hell am I gonna do!” Reiko shouts in anger.
She leapt and dodged three more attacks from Crisis’ hands and tail. Crisis smiled proudly ‘Hehehe you’re a quick one!”
“Please! Stop it!” Reiko plea’s as she kept dodging, leaping over her hands and tail, it was like a hundred yard dash….only it’s a hell of a lot more yards and if you fall you get eaten…
Reiko was panting and whimpering, her legs pumping heavily, her legs burn as she grew tired, the continual pumping and the pain she took to her side was making Reiko fatigued. Her eyes began to flutter as they closed as she began to slow down. Crisis tail swooped around to envelope the area in teal scales. Reiko opened her eyes only tin time to see the wall of scales before she ran into it. Rebounding she hit her butt on the grass. Whimpering she spun around to look up at Crisis…this was it…
The large naga had some sweat up on her brow, which she quickly wiped away as she smiles. “Oooo that was fun, puppy! I guess it’s time to end the little game though.” She smiled, reaching out.
“Oh please! Listen to me! There is a camp of cat-girls back there!!” She shouts.
Crisis blinked and paused. “You didn’t tell me they were cat-girls….Those are my favorite!”
“Well sorry…two big lips were around me when I shouted it!” She said nervously but with a hint of agitation.
“Hmmmmn I guess I might trust you…Just a little! …And if you run I can guarantee a full night stay in the Crisis hotel.” She said, patting her tummy.
‘T-That’s fine! Cause I’m not lying! You can even hold me in your hand so I can’t escape! I promise!”
Crisis contorted her face, a little wary, but she picked up Reiko, and the dog-girl didn’t squirm…so maybe she could trust the puppy. “Alright! Head back west! “ Reiko nods and points in the direction of the camp and Crisis started to slither there. She saw the plumes of smoke then loomed over the camp. Crisis began to drool.
“It’s….a camp of cat-girls!” |
Gah! I didn't realize that my Girlfriend's character "Rua" was described exacrly as Crisis 0.o Teal scales, teal eyes, and blonde hair! Go figure :/ lol I'll change Rua' description!
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| | | | Reiko
Roaming thug
Joined : 30 Dec 2007
Posts : 115
Location : Chidokai Forest
| | | | | dreadis
valiant swordman
Joined : 30 Jan 2008
Posts : 221
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:39 pm | |
| | Reiko wrote: | Woof sorry everyone....Chapter 10 will be out hopefully bu the end of the week....
Things have been kinda hard on this pup >.< and I haven't been feeling the best...so i am going to work on it...and i hope you all will enjoy it when its done. |
dont push yourself to hard and i cant wait for chapter 10
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i apologize for any spelling/punctuation errors in the above...and in this
(98% of explorers have been eaten or will be eaten by a native creature in Felarya. If you're one of the 2% not in this group, copy & paste this in your signature.) |
| | | | Pendragon
Felarya cartographer
Age : 19
Joined : 09 Dec 2007
Posts : 1535
Location : Inside an armored war machine.
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:46 pm | |
| Don't you worry, Reiko. Just focus on getting better. We can wait for your story. Right, everybody?
*looks around with a menacing grin*
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(98% of explorers have been eaten or will be eaten by a native creature in Felarya. If you're one of the 2% not in this group, copy & paste this in your signature.)
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| | | | Sean Okotami
Hero
Age : 18
Joined : 20 Jan 2008
Posts : 1242
Location : Shinnos
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:59 pm | |
| | Pendragon wrote: | Don't you worry, Reiko. Just focus on getting better. We can wait for your story. Right, everybody?
*looks around with a menacing grin* |
You aren't intimidating me, I'm busy catching up with Ravana3k's story and I haven't started reading Reiko's stuff.
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| | | | Pendragon
Felarya cartographer
Age : 19
Joined : 09 Dec 2007
Posts : 1535
Location : Inside an armored war machine.
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:03 pm | |
| It's a good thing so many people here know how to write good stories then, right?
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| | | | Sean Okotami
Hero
Age : 18
Joined : 20 Jan 2008
Posts : 1242
Location : Shinnos
| | Subject: Re: Reiko in Felarya (FINALLY CHAPTER TEN!!!!) Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:12 pm | |
| | Pendragon wrote: | | It's a good thing so many people here know how to write good stories then, right? |
Yeah, but that wasn't smart to omit putting a link to the previous story, especially when you have 5 pages of stories. How am I supposed to find the story with Flynn? At least he revealed his name.
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| | | | Reiko
Roaming thug
Joined : 30 Dec 2007
Posts : 115
Location : Chidokai Forest
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