Larriman: The Mind is a Dangerous Thing...

Name: Larriman (Larry or Larrs)

Age: 23

Race: Human

Height: 6ft 1in

Appearance: Larriman has a tall and thin body type, though his muscle mass is average. He has white skin, green eyes and a thick unkempt beard. He wears light clothing made from various pieces of leather stitched together. He carries a backpack made the same way, and he wears a leather belt and bandolier with at least 2 dozen knives attached to them. The knives vary in type and in quality. Some are made from steel, some from iron. A few are even made from bone. In his backpack he carries food and several bottles of homebrew alcohol.


Personality: On the surface, Larriman appears to be a cheerful man. But upon closer inspection he is actually bitter and pessimistic, wallowing in an ancient sorrow. His past haunts his thoughts all the time, and he comes off as rude and unlikable to most who meet him. He cares little for the safety of others. That, coupled with a grim sense of humor, means that he has no friends. Not that he really cares, since he has never had a true friend anyway.

He doesn't trust others, but will work with them if neccessary. Larrs secretly hopes to find redemption in Felarya. But the reason why he seeks redemption is an old wound, one that he dare not re-open, due to the pain and sorrow it would cause him.

He has a taste for alcohol, and often brews it himself when he can't aquire proffesionally brewed alcohol. He isn't often found without at least a dozen bottles of his homebrew in his pack. he isn't very dexterous with his hands, and often clumsily drops things by accident.
Years living alone as a hermit makes him adept at wilderness survival, and making him open to eating anything. ANYTHING. Worms and raw meat? Its whats for dinner...


Backstory: Larrs was always a very talented youth among his tribe. He was a part of one the many tribes of his world, always warring with one another over land and ideology. His world was fairly technologically advanced, equalling the technology level of medieval England. But instead of banding together, the people of his world fought each other and formed tribes of varying sizes and strengths. Magic was also fairly prevalent in his world, but only a select few could weild it.

Larrs had a difficult childhood. Born as a male in a powerful warrior tribe, he was expected to fight. But he soon proved inadequate at both physical and magical combat, making him an outcast among his people. He would spend most of his time forced to do menial chores and tasks due to his low status. When he turned twelve and was still not showing any promise, the village cheif stabbed him, and left him for dead on the borders of the tribe's land.

Whilst he was so close to death, Larrs could literally feel some sort of bond keeping him attached to his body. Full of pain and sorrow, he severed the bond and embraced death. But to his suprise, death did not await him. He found that he was now looking down at a blood covered boy. To his shock, he discovered he was looking down at himself! He had successfully severed his spirit from his body, without dying. Whilst in his spirit form, he found he had other ablities too. He could move objects without touching them, found that his feet hovered several inches off the ground, and that he could pass through trees as if they were not there.

He returned to his body and re-established the bond, joining with his body once again. Using his new found abilities, it was simple to build a shelter and gather food, while he slowly recuperated. He trained himself in his abilities as days went by, discovering that he could also transmit thoughts to other minds without saying a word. He used this to disorient animals, making them easier to catch. Months later, when he had recovered from his injuries, he made his way back to his tribe. His heart burned with the fires of rage, and his mind was clouded with vengeance.

He left his body behind in a safe place, and entered the village in his spirit form. He phased through the walls of huts and through the swords and arrows of frightened tribesman until he found the cheif. Not allowing him any time to apologise, Larrs used his power to remove the cheif's dagger from its sheathe and then plunged it viciously into the cheif's chest. Again and again and again, until he was beyond dead. But Larriman's lust for blood and death was not sated. He went from hut to hut, violently killing all of his the people he used to know. His parents, men, women and even children. By the time he was finished, Larrs could feel his spirit weakening from extensive use of his energy, and he returned to his body to recuperate.

It took a few days for the evil of what he had done to become apparent to him, and he was overcome with regret. For the next 11 years of his life he lived alone as an infamous hermit. Other tribes treated him like a monster and he became even more hated and lonely than before. He grew more isolated, bitter and cynical with each day that passed. Larrs wished that he could just be somewhere else. Somewhere where he could escape from what he had done. To just be transported somewhere else. Anywhere else. Anywhere? ...

Be careful what you wish for Larriman...

Here's what I think, for what it's worth.

To me, it seems you're in a dangerous spot with this character. As bad as it is to make a character totally good and awesome at everything and everyone looks up to them, making them horrible and hated without any redeeming qualities whatsoever is the opposite end of the spectrum, and I think it has the potential to be equally as damaging. You might want to throw in a good quality or two to his personality.

You say that on the surface he appears cheerful, but then go into much more detail about how he's rude, bitter, and pessimistic. To me, those two things just don't add up. I think you might need to explain a little more as to what makes him seem cheerful.

The backstory looks good, if making him seem somewhat overpowered. But that could just be how it's written. The fact that you don't go into his abilities and weaknesses in the bio could be good and bad for his case of possible OPness. Makes it somewhat difficult to assess the character. I know because I was there when we discussed it in chat that it's probably not the case, but anyone who wasn't and is reading this bio might get a different impression.

All in all, a pretty good bio and a decent character. Also I love your spelling and grammar, as well as the composition of this, too. ^.^

Thank you for the feedback Nyaha. ^^ Yes I see your point. Allow me to clarify and explain:

Abilities:

>Astral Projection

During Astral Projection, his spirit seperates from his body. His spirit form looks exactly like how his body currently looks, except for a cloud of thin white mist that surrounds him. Whilst in spirit form, he hovers a few inches from the ground and passes through all solid matter. That means that he cannot physically interact with the environment either. Things of a magical nature can still damage him however, such as spells and enchanted weapons. Silver weapons also damage him. While in this form, he can attack using telekinesis, or disorient the foe using telepathy. The major drawback to this ability is that his physical body is immobilised and completely vulnerable to damage.

>Psychokinesis (Telekinesis)

The ability to move objects through sheer force of will. He powers this ability by consuming his spirit energy. The heavier the object, the more spirit energy is consumed. Using Telekinesis, he can use the environment against foes, or even use their own weapons against them. He cannot lift a living being with telekinesis because their spirit will clash with his. Telekinesis does work on constucts however. Eg. (Golems)

>Telepathy

The ability to transmit thoughts directly into the mind of another. This is not mind control however, and it cannot be used to read minds either. It can be used in a friendly way, like to communicate with allies, or in an offensive way by transmiting negative thoughts and images into a foe's mind in order to disorient them. Magic can block telepathy, as can a sufficiently strong will. Telepathy is useless against constructs. Eg. (Golems)


Spirit energy is essentially the HP of his spirit form. This energy is also used to power his abilities so it is also his MANA if you will. If his spirit energy is depleted too much, he will cease to exist.


Thats the abilities explained better. Now for his personality. The only way I can really tell you is with examples. For example, he is the kind of person who would make jokes about extremely grim topics. Eg. "I wonder if a predator ever swallowed someone, and they accidentally went down the wrong hole? It'd be great! You could bounce around in their squishy lungs! What fun!" He is also the kind of person who has a balatant disregard for people he doesn't like. Eg. One of his companions gets eaten. "Never liked him much anyway..." Or he'd make jokes at really bad times. Eg. A naga appears in an open plain. "Watch out guys, I think we've got a snake in the grass..."

He can also be inquistive, often at the worst of times. Eg. Held above a pred's open mouth. " Hey, have you ever eaten anybody, and they've gone down the wrong hole? Cos' if I go down the wrong hole I swear I'll bounce around in there all day."

You wanted good personality traits? Very well.

>His sense of humor (It can be bad too. >_> )

>He seeks redemption.

>If he gets attached to someone he opens up to them more and actually cares for their safety.

>Essentially, you have to be his friend to see his good side, which is a little difficult to do. Want to be his friend, REAL fast? Buy him a bottle of something alcoholic. Not bottom shelf trash you cheapskate. Bring him something truly one of a kind and he'll be your BFF.

Like I said, these would be good things to put in the bio, rather than just telling me. :/ Better to keep it all in one place. Besides that, I think those answer the points I made very well. Good work.