Corrupt a Wish

granted, but now it's so hot everything in your house has caught fire

I wish I didn't lead so far with my shot at a deer today

Congrats, your shot was so dead on that you accidentally lead it to an head shot which unfortunately brakes one of the antlers, but it doesn't end there. The deer's spirit forms in apparition and he stops by your room and tells that he will haunt you all his days as visages of other deer around the forest so that it seems you waste your time (and your money and ammunition) killing specters of him till the end of all your days...All because you didn't lead the shot for the heart

I wish my fingernails and toenails would change to cool seasonal designs and stay with out getting scratched of by the hardest resistance their as my mood permits.

(for the record, the deer was female)

granted, you have perfect mood nail polish, except everybody has moved to plain old red for the next ten years and you are forever noted as a hippie when you are not

I wish acrylic paint wasn't such a pain in the next to mix and saturate

Granted! It's now easy mix and saturate, but when it's put on the wall it turns into crazy electric blue and green polka dots.

I wish this wish was only minorly twisted instead of beign totally corrupted.

The moderator abuses his power and edits your wish into something else, then that something else is minorly twisted in a way that results in complete corruption of your original intention.

I wish Cookie Clicker wasn't so dumb... XD

You are instead.  

I wish for a million helicopters and a dollar.

You instead get one million dollars and a helicopter. Sadly the helicopter is shot down and the money is stolen by a talking lobster that happened to be in the dumpster the bag of money fell into.

I wish I would call Microsoft and get my Xbox Live account sorted out.

Granted, you call Microsoft, but Bill Gates is having a particularly rage-y day and he picks up your call and tells you to go f*** yourself. Without the censor.

I wish for SICK FIRES, YO

Wish granted, I have set several puddles of vomit on fire...it really stinks.

I'll make a wish that can't backfire! I wish for a turkey sandwich...on rye bread...with lettuce...and mustard, and...AND...I don't want any zombie turkies, I don't wanna turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any more weird surprises, you got it?

granted, you get a turkey sandwich...on rye bread...with lettuce...and mustard, and...AND...I don't want any zombie turkies, I don't wanna turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any more weird surprises.....except for the fact that you forgot you hate the taste of turkey

I wish the hinge on my computer wasn't broken

Fine! The hinge isn't broken. It's MISSING.

I wish for something pervy.

wish granted, you get Vivian trying to do prostate surgery ON YOU!!!!

I wish for a stack of pringles

Granted. Favor: troll.

...
...
I wish I could remember how to remember my wishes!!!

Granted. You remember how to remember your wishes, but you forget to remember how to remember your wishes later on and have to make another wish wishing you could remember how to remember how to remember your wishes.

I wish for world peace. And if that was wished for already, then I wish for a spatular.

It has been granted before, but is shall be again and it will be a combo! You wish for world peace, but somebody else did that already so instead you get world pieces! A Spatular, a horrifying giant monster in the shape of Humanoid Kaiju-like creature appears on earth and with her mighty "Spatular Beam!!" She blows the world to pieces and proceeds to eat it!

I wished Nyaha hadn't wish for a Spatular.

granted he wished for hydrodynamic spatular with port and starboard attachments...and a turbo drive...except it explodes in awesomeness leaving him dead in awe and ya in prison for suspected murder

I wish for more computer ram

Your computer turns into a ram. The ram then proceeds to make you its ewe. In front of your family.

I wish elephants weren't endangered.

Granted, elephants are now extinct.

I wish I could water bend.

Granted, you can waterbend, but there is no water to bend.

I wish I had written a Thanksgiving story for my OCs.

granted, you wrote a story about them being together pigging out on some unfortunate humans and nekos all the female have huge bellies at the end of it and the guys are dead from protein poisoning

I wish I had the power to seduce any lady I wanted to, even the voracious ones

Granted, you now have the power to seduce any lady you want to. But it turns out you have horrible taste in women and they all turn out to be gold diggers and thieves who clean you out after you have them over.

I wish I had thought to listen to online videos using headphones earlier.

Granted You can watch any vide--oh maybe not well you can watch this one video on an infinite loop beuase I broke YouTube again Here you go https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNgsemWhYpco 

Well All I want is not to be so lonely anymore

Granted, you're the most popular man in the world, but people are constantly bothering you at literally all hours of the day, and you go crazy.

I wish I had some of that magic dirt so I can get over this flu.

you get magic but it only gets you proofereads who are this good

Me proofread. English know me good.



I wish that bird wasnt the word

TA TATA TA TA TA, TURD IS THE WORD. HAVEN'T YOU HEARD ABOUT THE TURD?

I wish for angel hair.