The Amulet of Storms.

So, I have an idea for a story. But, I'm not really sure what I should do for it. I'll put the idea here, and maybe you could tell me if it's even a good idea. I just want to get it down before I forget it.

The main character is a male around 20 years old. That's about all I've decided abou thim. Haven't even decided on a name. Or appearance. Or anything really. Just what happens to him. Basically, he's a human that was born with a genetic defect making him very vulnerable to disease, and lives in a hospital his whole life. Then, a portal to Felarya opens one day, and the idea is that he goes there, just flits in and out and gets cured. But it turns out that it can't fix the genetic defect, since it's a part of his own DNA. It still prevents him from getting sick however, so he's forced to stay or else he'll die soon anyway. He joins a group that's adventuring, looking for treasure, and they find a temple with a fairy guarding it. While the group is getting eaten alive, he sneaks by, grabs the treasure and runs. The treasure is a magical pendant that kind of allows him to control electricity to an extent. I haven't really thought of anything for him to actually do after that, though.

Maybe have him fight a large pred, who is weak versus lightning.

It would at least give him a fighting chance.

I thik the plot may look a bit generic but it can works if you have interesting and attaching character
I am looking forward to see it ^^

I've thought of an interesting way to tell the story, too. Crisis ate him, and he's telling her his story in exchange for letting him out.

Well that's an original way but the character would really have to be a hell of a story teller then I think..
I simply don't imagine Crisis throwing somebody up willingly once in her stomach ^^;

You've got yourself an entire book right there.

Name the main character Pickles...except don't.

It's been a while since I've touched this. Yeah, sorry, I'm lazy. And I still haven't come up with a name. But maybe writing the first part will motivate me a bit more. I'm not really a very good writer though. I tend to keep things concise, so it might move a bit fast and not go into detail much. Also, I don't know too much about Felarya, so if there are any errors or inconsistencies, please let me know.





When I was born, I was already nearly dead. I had a genetic disorder that essentially meant I was born without an immune system. Even the smallest virus or bacteria could kill me with no effort. Most people with this disease don't even live to the age of 1. So it's pretty much a miracle that I'm 22. But my luck was running out. My condition was becoming erratic, and it was likely I was going to die soon.
So I've lived my entire life in a plain, sterile white room, recieving many injections and other things every day to keep me from dying, with nothing to do but read books. One particular book interested me quite a bit. It told of when a long time ago, some strange portal opened in the middle of a town. A large group of people went in. Three days later, only one of them returned, talking about how everyone but him was eaten alive by giant snake people. He also mentioned a few other things as well, particularly about how all the people who were sick before they went in, and even the ones who weren't, acted like they'd never felt better. At least, up until they got eaten.
Anyway, the man told of how they had found a city, and had learned about the strange dimension called Felarya from a bartender there. How it could cure any disease, and effectively gave them eternal life, as well as the multitude of magic and treasures that could be found. I didn't really care about that part. I sometimes imagined that a portal would open someday. That I'd walk in and cure myself, then leave immediately before a giant snake person got me.

So, then one day, a nurse rushed in and told me that a portal actually had opened in a nearby town, and that the government had decided to rush every sick person in the world in and then have tthem leave immediately, effectively wiping the entire world of disease. So me, and a bunch of other people in the hospital, went and got into a helicopter, and started heading toward the portal.







So, there's the first part. I hope it's not completely horrible.

i would read that story

Thanks, I think.

Nice start, you certainly found a good pretext for him to visit Felarya ^^

Thanks alot. Okay, I'll start the next part now.


The helicopter flight was pretty eneventful. It took 2 hours until we got there. When I saw the portal, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was like some giant glowing doorway in the middle of a park. (Not exactly sure what one actually looks like. Tell me if it's wrong) The helicopter landed, and I got out and started walking towards it. I only took a few steps though, before I collapsed. Someone got me on a stretcher, and rolled me in. Suddenly, I was aware he was talking to me.
"Hey. You alright?"
I immediately sat up and looked around. "Y..yeah. I think so." It was... strange. Like some kind of jungle, but all the plants looked different, alien. I got up and took a few steps. Even the ground felt strange. Then again, the only floor I've ever felt was the tiled hospital floor, so it might be perfectly normal feeling ground.
"Really? Man, that's a relief. When you collapsed out there, I thought you'd died, or something."
"No... No, I'm fine." That was an understatement. I don't think I'd ever felt this good. I looked around again. There was a large number of soldiers, and even some tanks. Was all that really necessary? I didn't really want to stay to find out. I told him, "C'mon, we should leave." and started walking back.
"Huh? Oh, right. Right behind ya'."
The second I went back out, though, and saw normal trees and grass, I collapsed again.
"Hey! Hey, you alright?!" All I could do was groan in response, so he helped me back up, and dragged me back in. Instantly I felt better again. "What the hell happened? You sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine." What the hell was wrong? Shouldn't I have been cured? Maybe the effect wasn't immediate, and I had to wait around a little bit for it to work. "Just, leave me in here for awhile, alright? I'll be fine, and I'll leave as soon as I'm ready." I looked back at the entrance again, noticed that other people wearing hospital clothes were being led in, and then leaving immediately. Why weren't they staying? Maybe they had something less serious, maybe how long it takes depends on the severity of the disease. Still, something about this didn't seem right...
"You sure?" I looked at him and nodded. "Well, alright." He turned around and left.
I started walking around the barricade the military had constructed. There were a few small creatures that had been shot, as well as what appeared to be some kind of giant woman. At least, the top of her was. She didn't have any legs, it was... some kind of giant tail, like a snake. She would have been pretty attractive if she wasn't... well, dead. "Was it really necessary to kill her..?" I wasn't really talking to anyone, just thinking out loud, but a nearby soldier heard me and answered me.
"Her? She ate 17 people, crushed another 40 with her tail, and took around 20 tank rounds before we were finally able to take her down. I'd say it was pretty damn necessary."
"That's... wow. Unbelievable.."
"Yeah. And there're probably more of em' out there. The sooner this shit is all over, the better, I say."
I couldn't agree with him more. Just how long would I have to wait here, anyway? I looked around, and spotted a person who looked like he was in charge. He wore the uniform of a high ranking soldier, anyway. I walked over to him, and started talking to him.
"Uh... Excuse me, sir?"
"Hm? What're you still doing here? You're supposed to leave once you come in."
"Yes, I know. And I did. But, when I left, I got sick again."
He paused for a second, before saying "Your sickness wouldn't happen to be caused by a genetic disease, would it?"
"...Yes, it is."
"Oh. Well, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but this place doesn't seem to be able to cure genetic diseases. You're just going to have to live with it. I'm Sorry."
"I...ah...Alright then." I turned around and started walking back toward the entrance. Live with it? I'll die if I go back out there! And if I stay in here, I'll probably end up getting eaten by some giant snake-person! There wasn't really any time to think about it though, as I noticed some kind of fight going on near the entrance. Some group of heavily-armed people were in some sort of argument with a guard.
"Listen, I can't let you go out there, it's too dangerous."
One of the men pulled out his rifle and waved it around, saying, "Well why do you think we brought these? If something tries to attack us, we'll just shoot it."
Another of them stepped up. "From what we've heard, this place is full of treasure, and we intend to find it, bring it back, and make millions!"
The soldier sighed. "Fine. Go out there and get yourselves killed. Not like I give a shit."
The group started crossing the barricade, going out into the jungle. I ran after them. Maybe they'd let me come with them. Even if they did end up dieing, me with them, it'd probably be better than lying in a hospital bed waiting to die.
"Hey! Wait!"
One of them stopped and turned to face me. "What do you want?"
"Take me with you."
He looked at me for a second, before saying, "Alright, fine. We should have an extra gun, and a spare set of clothes for you. Unless you plan on wearing that hospital gown."
"No, I don't."
"Okay. My name's Jim. I'm leader of this little group. Nice to have you aboard."



Okay. There's part two. Not really sure I like how it's written, but it gets the message across, I guess.

I've decided to do another part. Tell me what you think.


"It's been two weeks."
"I know."
We had stopped traveling for the day and were currently sitting in front of a campfire. Now, as it usually happened, one of the adventurers, Kyle, was complaining to the leader, Jim.
"The portal back home's probably closed by now, and we haven't found a single damn thing worth taking back."
"If you want to go back, you're going alone."
Kyle scoffed, "Are you kidding? We lost more than half our people getting this far to all kinds of snake, spider, and bug people, and on one occasion, some giant tree that you had us camp under! Not only that, but we have practically no ammo left!"
"So then what do you suggest we do?"
"Find some goddamn civilization! Maybe find that Ur-Sagol place that was mentioned in the stories!"
"That was thousands of years ago, it could be destroyed by now. And we're not going anywhere until we find some treasure. That's what we came out here to do, and every one of you knew the risks involved. Besides, we already found 2 temples"
"Yeah, that had already been looted. Well, I'm not staying on this goddamn suicide mission. I'm getting the hell out of here!" With that, Kyle got up and started walking away. Noone else said anything after that, and we all went to sleep.


I know it isn't really written that well. I'm not much of a writer, I just want to get my ideas and the general plot down.

This is pretty good!

It's going nice I think
The setting is interesting and your descriptions are good ^_^

I am so lazy. I've had the entire story in my head since I started this, but I just couldn't get enough motivation to actually write it down. I'm going to try doing the next part now. Also, I've decided on a name for the main character. Alex.



Noone talked much the next day. As much as we didn't want to admit it, Kyle was right. We're all hopelessly lost, and completely outmatched. The most we had managed to do was to shoot one of those snake things in the eye once, but that had just gotten it angry, and started smashing with it's tail as opposed to picking people up one at a time and swallowing them whole. But we had gone too far and lost too many to even consider going back, so all we could do was walk forward, and wonder how much time we had left.

At least, until the ground fell out beneath me and I fell in a deep hole.
"Alex! You okay down there? I thought it was another attack for a second!" It was Jim. Guess he heard me screaming in terror when I fell.
"Yeah, I'm fine, don't worry!"
"We'll toss down a rope, help you climb up!"
I took a quick look around. It was just dirt, like you'd expect to find in a hole, except there was a large, stone arch that led to some kind of stone passage. "Hang on a second. There's some kind of tunnel down here. I think it might be some hidden ruins!"
There was a short pause. "If it was buried underneath the ground, it's a safe bet noone's been here yet!! C'mon, let's check it out! This might be just the break we've been looking for!!"

Within seconds, the team had climbed down, and we walked down the hallway. It was long. And uneventful.
Before too long though, we came to doorway which led to a very large, empty room, except for a stone pedestal in the center. There was a small chest on top of it.

"Hahaha!! This is it this is what we've been looking for! I bet there's treasure right in there! Let's grab it and get the hell out of here!" Before Jim and everyone else could take 2 steps though, a small winged person floated in his path and stopped him. I quickly took cover behind the wall in the doorway. I didn't trust anything in this place, no matter how harmless it looked. Not after the killer tree.
The small creature spoke. "Hi there! Now, just what're you doing here?"
"Taking that treasure. Now hurry up and get out of the way unless you want to get hurt!" Jim pointed his rifle at her to emphasis his point.
The thing just giggled, and said "You've never seen a fairy before, have you? Or are you just stupid?"
Jim growled and opened fire on it. The, fairy, I guess it's called, dodged each bullet gracefully. Before long he ran out of ammo and had to stop to reload. Before he even could though, the fairy waved her hand at him. Slowly, he began shrinking. He got smaller, and smaller. The rest of the team could only stare on in horror. Before long, Jim was even smaller than her. She picked him up, and swallowed him whole. She giggled again.

That was the rest of the team's cue to start running. Once again though, she flew in front of the doorway, which I was hiding behind, blocking them off. Fortunately, she didn't seem to notice me.

She waved her hand again, and I expected the others to shrink. Instead though, she got bigger. Really big. As big as any of the other predators we had seen. The team panicked, and opened fire. She was blocking the exit, so all they could do was run into a corner, which she of course followed them to.

There was nothing I could do to help. Their bullets clearly weren't doing anything to it. She just kept giggling as she picked them up one by one and dropped them into her mouth. If I tried to help, she'd just eat me too. Running away wouldn't help either, I wouldn't last a day on my own.

I looked towards the chest in the center. There could be something useful in there, maybe some kind of magical weapon. And I would probably be able to just walk up and take it while she was distracted eating the others. If I was spotted, though, chances are it'd be all over.

...At least it'd be more interesting than dying in a hospital bed. I ran towards the chest as quickly as I could without making noise. I went to open it, but apparently it was locked. Guess there was nothing else to do. I hoisted my gun up and opened fire on it. The wooden chest broke apart, and inside was lying some kind of necklace, or pendant. Great. This thing wasn't going to help me kill the fairy. And as I figured, she heard the gunfire and turned around. She had just finished off the last one. With no options left, I grabbed the necklace and ran. Of course, she flew after me. A bit too fast maybe, since after I ran out the doorway, I heard a loud crash and the everything shook. She was too big to fit through it and had flown straight into the wall. I didn't turn back to check though, I just kept running until I was back in the hole, and climbed up the rope that had been set for us to climb back up when we got back. I went to the nearest tree, and hid behind it so if she came up, she wouldn't see me.

Sure enough, not long after, I heard wings fluttering and the fairy say to herself, "Aww... He got away! Now I'm going to have to find some other ruin with a valuable treasure to protect..." I heard the wings fluttering away, and slowly get quieter. About ten minutes after they were gone, I sat down, and looked at the necklace.

It was pretty plain. Just a string, with a pendant at the end. In the middle of it, there was a shiny blue gem. I put it around my neck anyway. At least I was still alive.

But now what?

This is very interesting! Looking back on the posts before, I agree that it seems unlikely that Crisis would let someone out of her stomach for this. Maybe if he was a really good story teller she just wouldn't eat him in the first place...but once she ate him I think her mind's made up anyways.

Yeah, I couldn't see it happening either. It was a very stupid idea I had on a whim. I don't think I'll include Crisis or any other characters in the story at all, really.

I dunno. I think it could be a really cool idea if tweaked a bit and thought out first.

Nice chapter ^^ I wonder what the necklace is

I walked away from the ruins, staring absentmindedly at the necklace around my neck. All of those people, dead, just for this little trinket. And the same thing would probably happen to me the first monster I come across. Only question was, when?

...not long apparently, as I walked right into a snake thing's tail since I was too busy looking at the necklace, to watch where I was going. She turned to see what had bumped into her, and seeing me, let out a giggle. She was cute, of course, just like everything else here. She had short red hair, too. I tried to run, but she grabbed me before I could move two feet, and brought me up to her face. So this was how it ended? All I could do was let out a sigh. "Alright, you got me. Make it quick."
She giggled again. "Ah, now where's the fun in that?" She loosened her grip enough to let my arm free, and then grabbed it with her other hand. "It's so much more entertaining to break all their little bones first and listen to them scream~"
"W-wait, you don't have to-" I didn't finish as she applied pressure, and snapped the bone in two. I screamed in pain, and shut my eyes. Suddenly, I was falling out of the air, and landed on the ground.
"OW!!! That hurt, you little shit!! Never would've guessed someone as pathetic looking as you would've been a mage!"
"W...what're you talking about? I don't know any magic!" There wasn't even any such thing as magic back in my dimension. I didn't get much time to think about it though, as she picked me up again and held me over her mouth.
"Bullshit!! You just shocked me! Well fine then, you wanna play like that? Let's see how you like it in there!!" She let me go, and I fell into her mouth. She swallowed quickly, and I could no longer see anything.

...The sensation might have been enjoyable, honestly, if it weren't for the fact I was going to die and my arm was broken. I stopped going down, and fell into a more roomier area. This must be the stomach. So, this is where I'm going to die. Suddenly, I saw a bright light. Was that it? Was I already dead? That was quick. I hadn't even felt anything yet.

Wait. That light was coming from me. I looked down, and saw the necklace. The jewel in the center was glowing bright. What was happening to it? My question was answered fairly quickly, as what appeared to be a massive beam of light emanated from it. In an instant it was gone, and now there was natural sunlight pouring in through a hole in the creature's stomach.
I didn't want to spend any longer in here, so I crawled out and started running as fast as I could. What had just happened? What's this thing around my neck? Once again, I didn't have time to think. That seems to happen a lot.



THIS is where I hit a wall. I have no idea what he should do after this.

enter right stage baras

he's from stumbling skyward and some other role plays. he is not my character

11cookeaw1, what makes you think he'll be interested in my character? Because I highly doubt he is.

Anyway, pretty good story! Sorry you have a small snag of writer's block. Keep up the good work!

It's been a while since I've touched this. Again. Sorry to keep all my fans (Yeah right.) waiting. I finally came up with some kind of a plot, though, and I figure I should finally get around to doing the next part.




After running what he felt was a safe distance away, Alex sat down underneath a tree, next to a river, so he could take a closer look at his arm. To his surprise, it was already healed. He never would've guessed it had been broken. Probably from being in Felarya, healing his wounds much faster than normal.

With that problem out of the way, Alex took a closer look at the amulet around his neck. He didn't have any idea what it was. It had released a burst of electricity while he was in that predator's hand, and after it had swallowed him... He couldn't think of any word to even begin to describe that. This thing was definitely some kind of magical artifact. Powerful, too. Maybe he could control it somehow...?

Alex stood up, and held out his hand toward the river, trying to shoot a lightning bolt at it. At first, nothing happened. After a few seconds of focusing, though. Alex felt like he could feel some kind of... invisible muscle in his arm. Something which had definitely never been there before. He gave it a tiny twitch, and sure enough, a bright bolt of lightning burst out of his hand, straight into the river. A second later, a number of fish floated to the top, dead.

Alex could only grin to himself. Now, he had some type of powerful magic at his disposal! He was still all alone in this strange land, but now he had a chance for survival! Speaking of which, he was kind of hungry. Alex quickly waded into the river, picking out most of the fish, before starting a small campfire to cook them over.



Later...

Alex had finished off most of the fish. However, he noticed someone walking towards him. Some girl, who, for some reason, wasn't wearing any clothes. ...Were those cat ears and a tail? Whoever, or whatever she was, she didn't look dangerous.

Once she got close enough, she looked at me before saying in a bright and cheery voice "Hi!"
"Um, hi? Wh-"
"Are those fish?" She asked quickly, before I could finish.
"Huh? Oh yeah, I cau-"
"Can I have some?"
"Oh. Um, sure, I guess you can have some," I said, pointing to the few I hadn't eaten yet. She immediately sat down next to the fish, and started eating them. She was pretty cute, and had short, blond hair. ...Her ears and tail were both blonde too.
"...So, um, who are you, exactly? My name's Alex"
She finished eating the fish in her hands before answering, "Oh, sorry! I was so hungry, I didn't think about it! My name's Malora! Nice to meet you, Alex!" She quickly grabbed another fish.
"Nice to meet you too." I paused a bit before asking "...I'm sorry if this sounds kind of weird, but.. what are you, exactly? I'm guessing you're not human."
She stared at me for a second before giggling. "You're new here, aren't you?"
Alex nodded, "Yeah, a bit."
She giggled again. "That's fine. I'm a Neko! You know, a cat girl! There are whole villages of us, up in the trees! Speaking of which, I need to get back there now! It's getting late!" She paused a bit, before asking, "Hey, want to come with me? I mean, you were real nice to me. I'm sure they wouldn't mind visitors!"
Sleeping in a village up in the trees certainly sounded a lot safer than sleeping on the open ground. "Sure, sounds good."
"Alright then! C'mon, follow me!"

good story so far... keep it up!