The Arena

The Rev wrote:

Dethklok is awesome, love the show. I personally wonder what would win if Sephiroth fought Itachi Uchiha. I know that Sephiroth is practically a god and whatnot, but Itachi is pretty downright cunning, and seems like he could give anyone a run for their money.

Aye, Sephiroth isn't much more then (At best) college education. That's assuming ShinRa even bothered to give him an education in anything more than Warfare.

The power disparity can get a bit... big, though. Sephiroth can use Black Materia. Said materia can summon a huge meteor. Said Meteor can fuck-over planets.

Worse comes to worse, the Sephiroth fans could just argue that (Though most people [myself included] feel that it is worthless in most scenarios as it is not part of his usual equipment).

I got another one:

Crisis vs. Jigsaw

That is, Crisis having to escape from one of Jigsaw's traps. My only problem is thinking of a good trap for her.

"The human will take you to the end of the maze, and unlock the door."
"Nya-ha, took the key and ate them already!"
"Also, the human's clothes were laced with enough Cyanide, Arsenic, and Tetrodotoxin to poison a whole nation."
"...Feth."

I thought it would be more like:

Voice-Rise and shine, Crisis.

Crisis-Wha...?

*A jumbo-tron activates and Jigsaw's face appears*

Jigsaw-You're probably wondering where you are. Well, I'll tell you where kyou might be. You might be in the room that you die in.

Crisis-*scared* What is this?

Jigsaw-Let's play a game. Notice the pipes all over the room, Crisis. In precisely five minutes, they will dump a highly corrosive acid and flood the room. Think of it as an oversized stomach. The only way out is through that blast door. There is only one way to open it. Inside that little cubicle is a human that possesses the codes to unlock the door. There's only one problem; I've told him that your intention is to eat him and his family once you escape. He might not be so keen to open the door. Your job is to convince him. If you cannot convince him in five minutes, then you'll soon know what it feels like to be the prey. Your time begins now. Live or die; it's your choice. Good luck, Crisis.

dlausactor6373 wrote:

I thought it would be more like:

Voice-Rise and shine, Crisis.

Crisis-Wha...?

*A jumbo-tron activates and Jigsaw's face appears*

Jigsaw-You're probably wondering where you are. Well, I'll tell you where kyou might be. You might be in the room that you die in.

Crisis-*scared* What is this?

Jigsaw-Notice the pipes all over the room, Crisis. In precisely two hours, they will dump a highly corrosive acid and flood the room. Think of it as an oversized stomach. The only way out is through that blast door. There is only one way to open it. Inside that little cubicle is a human that possesses the codes to unlock the door. There's only one problem; I've told him that your intention is to eat him and his family once you escape. He might not be so keen to open the door. Your job is to convince him. If you cannot convince him in two hours, then you'll soon know what it feels like to be the prey. Your time begins now. Good luck, Crisis.

That pretty much nailed it.

That was beautiful. It was a situation that'll make Crisis truly think.

It also has that "ironic" death situation that SAW is known for.

Personally, I found that Saw scenario childish and cruel.

This is the way I see it: She's the predator, I'm the prey. We both want to survive, either I escape or she eats me.

It's like what Solid Snake said about war: "We [Grey Fox and Him] weren't enemies; just professionals on opposite sides. Nothing personal."

Then what is Crisis learning if you're putting her in a beneficial position? The trap would be meant for Crisis, to teach her that there is more to humans than just a hearty meal. That's the beauty of the Saw movies; Jigsaw chooses his victims' scenarios based on how they live their life. He's trying to teach them the meaning their lives have. The means in which they die are, as such, "ironic", as stated by Pendragon.

dlausactor6373 wrote:

Then what is Crisis learning if you're putting her in a beneficial position? The trap would be meant for Crisis, to teach her that there is more to humans than just a hearty meal. That's the beauty of the Saw movies; Jigsaw chooses his victims' scenarios based on how they live their life. He's trying to teach them the meaning their lives have. The means in which they die are, as such, "ironic", as stated by Pendragon.

I wouldn't intend to teach Crisis anything; hell, I wouldn't even talk to her, I would hit the ground running as soon as I heard her!

I just want save my own skin: why put it at risk by playing teacher?

I think it would teach her something. You're just there as an aid IMO to help her understand.

BTW, I think Saw should make the room fill with acid immeidately. A whole two hours is ridiculous. Her stomach doesn't give me two hours of peace, then start dissolving. It starts dissolving right away.

Pendragon wrote:

I think it would teach her something. You're just there as an aid IMO to help her understand.

BTW, I think Saw should make the room fill with acid immeidately. This whole two hours nonsense is ridiculous. Her stomach doesn't give me two hours of peace, then start dissolving. It starts dissolving right away.

Ah, but why? Why keep fiddling with your endless toy morality? Morality ends when force begins: when one's life is threatened. Crisis isn't interested in her prey's notions of morality-it would be as casting pearls before swine, no offense to Crisis. Going to those lengths isn't merely silly-it can be dangerous. The Guardians would be VERY keen on eliminating Jigsaw, one way or another.

You're right. Two hours is too long. I'll change it to something like five minutes.

Siafu789 wrote:

The Guardians would be VERY keen on eliminating Jigsaw, one way or another.

Why would they give a shit about it?

Mentalguy wrote:

Why would they give a shit about it?

Come on, a whacked out human torturing Felarya's residents and lecturing them about right and wrong? The questions is: Why wouldn't they give a shit?

Because he's already dead. Besides, in the movies, finding out that he had an inoperable brain tumor is what set him on his path. And even if the guardians take him out, his aprentice is still at large.

observer88 wrote:

Because he's already dead. Besides, in the movies, finding out that he had an inoperable brain tumor is what set him on his path. And even if the guardians take him out, his aprentice is still at large.

Aye, and the thing was, all his (Note 'his' and not his 'Apprentices') traps ARE quite possible to escape.

Odds are that the human 'tasked' with letting Crisis free would be one who had a great distrust of Naga's. Jigsaw would also place a trap further down the line that a Naga would be needed to get past.

If the human tells Crisis to "Fuck off", he dies. If Crisis doesn't convince the human to help her in time, both die. A fingerprint scanner or something would likely be at the end of the thing as well, so that if Crisis has him free her (And then eats him), she'll die.

Somebody really needs to write a novel on this. I'm begging here.

This story is pure gold.

"Crisis versus SAW" or "SAW V: To Vore or Not to Vore".

Let's get back to the main topic-in short, let's come up with other "Battles of the Century".

Okay. Okay. Sounds like a good plan.

How about a Dryad versus Paul Bunyon?

Pendragon wrote:

Okay. Okay. Sounds like a good plan.

How about a Dryad versus Paul Bunyan?

I was thinking Naked Snake (aka Big Boss) vs. Felarya. Not a fight, more like an endurance test-how long could "The Greatest Soldier Who Ever Lived" last? More over, what about his clones?

Personally, I think it's unfair: Naked Snake would outlast all his clones, including Solid Snake. Solid Snake may not be as intimidated by Crisis's size, but he only good at urban espionage-in a jungle like Felarya, he's a sitting duck.

Naked Snake however, would be in his element-he would love it there! And all that camouflage doesn't hurt either.

The deciding factor is how they would perform with as few weapons as possible, or none-and Big Boss comes out as the clear victor.

Computer Canon Baldur's Gate Protagonist on Felarya. Especially if they get to bring their party.

Edwin(a), Minsc, Imoen, PC, Saervok, and Jan Jansen in Felarya would be... interesting to say the least.

I am soo so sorry for doing this... but I couldn't resist

Chuck Norris Vs. Sephiroth

NinthSun wrote:

I am soo so sorry for doing this... but I couldn't resist

Chuck Norris Vs. Sephiroth

Chuck Norris wins in all. If going by even the zaniest Chuck Norris and Sephiroth facts, Supernova < Big Bang.

If going by real-life, Chuck Norris is made of flesh. Sephiroth is made of Computer Data. Chuck Norris hits "Power".

And if we take 'real' Sephiroth against real Chuck Norris, Norris dies and goes to wherever dead people go here. Sephiroth is stuck on a Planet with no Lifestream, no Materia to cast with, and nothing to do for a long, long time.

Malahite wrote:

NinthSun wrote:

I am soo so sorry for doing this... but I couldn't resist

Chuck Norris Vs. Sephiroth

Chuck Norris wins in all. If going by even the zaniest Chuck Norris and Sephiroth facts, Supernova < Big Bang.

If going by real-life, Chuck Norris is made of flesh. Sephiroth is made of Computer Data. Chuck Norris hits "Power".

And if we take 'real' Sephiroth against real Chuck Norris, Norris dies and goes to wherever dead people go here. Sephiroth is stuck on a Planet with no Lifestream, no Materia to cast with, and nothing to do for a long, long time.

He, he, he. In another forum I go, peoples make Sephiroth auto-lose every fights for the sole reason that his fanboys are dead annoying.

Sean Okotami wrote:

He, he, he. In another forum I go, peoples make Sephiroth auto-lose every fights for the sole reason that his fanboys are dead annoying.

Know what you mean.

Not as bad as the mass of Master Chief fanboy/girls, but Sephiroth fanboy/girls needed to be reduced in number every now and then as well.