| | First Felaryan Odyssey up! |  |
|
|
| Author | Message |
|---|
EdgedWeapon
valiant swordman
Posts : 189
Join date : 2010-10-04
 |  Subject: First Felaryan Odyssey up!  Fri Aug 05, 2011 2:36 pm | |
| Hey guys! The first Felaryan Odyssey story is up, and it's a big one. You can view it here:
http://edgedweapon.deviantart.com/#/d45je6p
Still not sure how to set up hyperlinks, so just copy and paste. Please comment! Thanks to anime-junkie for proofreading it! | |
|
 | |
Anime-Junkie
Loremaster
Posts : 2690
Join date : 2007-12-16
Age : 31
Location : The Country of Kangaroos and Criminal Scum
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Fri Aug 05, 2011 2:53 pm | |
| Heh, this may be a little too early, I was actually finishing up some more editing and comments as you posted this. Sorry! Also. to hyperlink: - Code:
-
[url=www.URLGOESHERE.com]TEXT YOU WANT TO SHOW GOES HERE[/url] | |
|
| | |
EdgedWeapon
valiant swordman
Posts : 189
Join date : 2010-10-04
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Fri Aug 05, 2011 4:12 pm | |
| Thanks for the help AJ! As for your comments, I did take them into account and edited the story after I posted it on dA. Would you be willing to help me with the next Felaryan Odyssey too? | |
|
| | |
noneofurbussiness
Helpless prey
Posts : 29
Join date : 2011-07-28
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:57 pm | |
| I thought it was overall pretty good, made sense, was clear and understandable. And the interections with the main character and the sword were entertaining, aswell was the situation with the two preds going at it. ( I think that there is a spelling error with "practice" as shown: "Okay then, let's practise." Kurt said, drawing the magical katana.)
| |
|
| | |
EdgedWeapon
valiant swordman
Posts : 189
Join date : 2010-10-04
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Fri Aug 05, 2011 10:27 pm | |
| Aaah! I always get those two mixed up! I thought 'practise' was the verb and 'practice' was the noun! | |
|
| | |
Anime-Junkie
Loremaster
Posts : 2690
Join date : 2007-12-16
Age : 31
Location : The Country of Kangaroos and Criminal Scum
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Sat Aug 06, 2011 8:07 am | |
| - EdgedWeapon wrote:
- I thought 'practise' was the verb and 'practice' was the noun!
This is correct. | |
|
| | |
McKindle
Veteran knight
Posts : 264
Join date : 2011-08-08
Age : 37
Location : Midlands, UK
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:52 pm | |
| Liked it a lot! Would be interesting to see Kurt's backstory fleshed out more. Not a massive fan of the fourth wall break re. Mirror's Edge but I suppose it fits the tone of the story.  | |
|
| | |
EdgedWeapon
valiant swordman
Posts : 189
Join date : 2010-10-04
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:35 pm | |
| I'll keep that in mind. Less fourth wall breaky. And don't worry, Kurt's backstory will be fleshed out. | |
|
| | |
Sponsored content
| | Subject: Re: First Felaryan Odyssey up! | |
| |
|
| | |
| | First Felaryan Odyssey up! | |
|
