Song Lyrics

Kiss My Irish Ass

Oh the churchbells are ringin' in the schoolyard,
And we all went out those days
The bully said "Mick would you fancy a rumble?"
I said "Yes, it's time to play!"

Oh the nuns and the priests they grabbed their Rosaries
As they pulled our bodies apart
The bully said "Mick you lost the fight, but you've gained my respect!
You fight with so much heart!"

We're as stubborn as mules
With our blood on fire
When we ain't at Sunday mass
We'll look any man straight in his eyes and say
Kiss my Irish ass!
You better kiss my Irish ass!

Oh the husbands and wives, they had a neighborhood pack
They called the Mackeys white trash behind our backs (White Trash!)
I was way too young to understand that
But if I did, I'd given it right back

Oh me dad, he'd be drunk on the lawn,
Yelling and screaming like he do
But sometimes my old man felt what he was feeling,
Sometimes Mr. Mackey spoke the truth

We're as stubborn as mules
With our blood on fire
When we ain't at Sunday mass
We'll look any man straight in his eyes and say
Kiss my Irish ass!
You better kiss my Irish ass!

Oh me grandpa passed through Ellis Island,
From the greatest of the Motherlands
For he worked, provided for his family
He was a dedicated welding man
And he knew right from wrong like day and night,
He could whip any fool in a bareknuckle fight
He talked of country like he preached of God,
One hell of an Irishman!

We're as stubborn as mules
With our blood on fire
When we ain't at Sunday mass
We'll look any man straight in his eyes and say
Kiss my Irish ass!
You better kiss my Irish ass!


Oooohh, I'm of a distant relation to John Redman,
He was one of the greatest Irish Rebels of his day
One bastard to another, on down the line
And this is what my son will say:

We're as stubborn as mules
With our blood on fire
When we ain't at Sunday mass
We'll look any man straight in his eyes and say
Kiss my Irish ass!
We're as stubborn as mules
With our blood on fire
When we ain't at Sunday mass
We'll look any man straight in his eyes and say
Kiss my Irish ass!
You better kiss my Irish ass!

looking threw the glass



I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
Oh god it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home sitting all alone inside your head

How do you feel? That is the question
But i forget.. you dont expect and easy answer
When something like a soul becomes
Initialized and folded up like paper dolls and little notes
You cant expect a bit of hope
And while your outside looking in
Describing what you see
Remember what your staring at is me

Cause I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
All i know is that it feels like forever
When no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

How much is real? So much to question
And never dare make up the mannequins
Contaminating everything
When thought came from the heart
It never did right from the start
Just listen to the noises
(No more sad voices)
Before you tell yourself
Its just a different scene
Remember its just different from what you've seen

Im looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
And all i know is that it feels like forever
When no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you
And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah

I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
Oh god it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

Cause I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
All i know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
feels like home, sitting all alone inside your heaaaaddd

And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you.. yeah-ah
And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah

And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you.. yeah-ah
And its the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah yeah

Ohhhoh the starrs
Ohhh oh the starrrrs that liieee

The Presidents
Jonathan Coulton

Washington came first and he was perfect.
John Adams kept us out of war with France.
Jefferson made Louisiana Purchase.
In 1812 James Madison kicked the British in the pants.

James Monroe told Europe they could suck it.
John Quincy Adams looked just like his dad.
Andrew Jackson got rid of all the Indians.
Van Buren served one term, but he wasn't bad.

William Henry Harrison died early.
John Tyler annexed Texas from Mexico.
James K. Polk fought Mexico to keep it.
Taylor was a Mexican War hero.

Fillmore gave a boat to Commodore Perry.
Pierce appealed the Missouri Compromise.
Buchanan saw the Civil War's beginnings.
Lincoln saved the Union, then he died.

Andrew Johnson just survived impeachment.
General Grant enjoyed a drink or two.
Rutherford B. Hayes ended reconstruction.
Garfield was assassinated in 1882.

Arthur suspended Chinese immigration.
Cleveland made the railroad people squirm.
Harrison signed the Sherman Anti-Trust Act.
Grover Cleveland served another term.

McKinley kicked the Spanish out of Cuba.
Roosevelt was handy with a gun.
Taft was big and fat and had a mustache.
Wilson kicked some ass in World War I.

Harding said "Let's Laissez Fair with business."
Coolidge made the roaring 20s roar.
Hoover screwed the pooch in the great depression.
Roosevelt beat the Nazis in the war.

Truman dropped the bomb on Hiroshima.
Eisenhower kept the Commies well in hand.
Kennedy was killed by a magic bullet.
Johnson murdered kids in Vietnam.

Nixon was a sweating, filthy liar.
Ford gave Nixon pardon for his crimes.
Carter lusted in his heart for peanuts.
Reagan won the Cold War, and lost his mind.

George Bush Sr. poked at Saddam Hussein.
Clinton gave an intern a cigar.
W's legacy's a work in progress.
That is all the President's so far.

In the year 20058 we're out of money.
Somewhere, surely, freedom's on the march.
I don't like to make political statements.
*The song continues without lyrics*