Terror in Felarya

Gone

Very nice beginning and also the including of Crisis was very good

Like it and I'm looking forward to see how terror will make herself in felarya

Ravana3k wrote:

Very nice beginning and also the including of Crisis was very good

Like it and I'm looking forward to see how terror will make herself in felarya

^_^ thank you! and I'll have the redone/edited version of chapter 2 up soon.

That's the second time Crisis gets startled by a demonic transformation, though she didn't see the actual transformation the first time.

Sean Okotami wrote:

That's the second time Crisis gets startled by a demonic transformation, though she didn't see the actual transformation the first time.

Who wouldn't be startled?? heck if my donut suddenly grew wings and roared at me I'd be running like hell.

Moonlight-pendent wrote:

Who wouldn't be startled?? heck if my donut suddenly grew wings and roared at me I'd be running like hell.

I would grab the first I dound and I would smash it with it

gwadahunter2222 wrote:

Moonlight-pendent wrote:

Who wouldn't be startled?? heck if my donut suddenly grew wings and roared at me I'd be running like hell.

I would grab the first I dound and I would smash it with it

I wouldn't do that,because if a donut roars at you you get your ass out of there as fast as you can! XD

Can you make a profile of Terror? I always refer to profiles to get a character's personality right.

Sean Okotami wrote:

Can you make a profile of Terror? I always refer to profiles to get a character's personality right.

There is one, on here somewhere and a larger one on my DA account.

I can't find it on DA.

FurryKurry wrote:

[quote="Moonlight-pendent]I wouldn't do that,because if a donut roars at you you get your ass out of there as fast as you can! XD

I'd probably tame it, and teach it to do tricks, then take it to an donut show. Then again, if a donut roars at you, that just means it's alive, which means it'll be that much painful for it when you eat it anyway.[/quote]

Uhh XD this is the wrong forum for that ^^;

I read the one here, I'd like to see her fight the demonic side of Sean.

Sean Okotami wrote:

I read the one here, I'd like to see her fight the demonic side of Sean.

Ahhh uhhhh who's Sean? lol

Sean Okotami wrote:

Who wouldn't be startled?? heck if my donut suddenly grew wings and roared at me I'd be running like hell.

If I had a donut that did that, I'd teach it tricks. I'd tame it with the threat of me eating it anyway. If it's alive, it's more painful for the donut if I eat it. ^^

Moonlight-pendent wrote:

Sean Okotami wrote:

I read the one here, I'd like to see her fight the demonic side of Sean.

Ahhh uhhhh who's Sean? lol

He's my OC. His profile. At some point in the story, is demonic form is forcefully unlocked prematurely and can't control it. It mostly happens when his dark personality takes over. If you read my stories, you'll know more.

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i like your stories a lot. it would help a little if you corrected a little grammer but i beleive it could really be a good book. id buy it at least.

bigman27622 wrote:

i like your stories a lot. it would help a little if you corrected a little grammer but i beleive it could really be a good book. id buy it at least.

Thank you alot ^^ I'm glad to hear that but uhh I DID correct the grammer best I could at least, I was correcting both these chapters for a good hour each though I still need to improve abit more on discribing and how characters interact.

THERE. Now you can't say I'm not reading your stories!

Post the next one NAOUGH!!!!!

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GREGOLE FAILS

There were two women and three menin the group

needs a space

no offence ofcourse my spelling and grammer sucks i just had to point it out because you said GREGOLE had it compleatly corrected

dreadis wrote:

GREGOLE FAILS

There were two women and three menin the group

needs a space

no offence ofcourse my spelling and grammer sucks i just had to point it out because you said GREGOLE had it compleatly corrected

Hey give him a break XD it took him an HOUR to correct it. Seriously the way I wrote it and spaced it it was a TOTAL mess nearly gave him a heartattack.

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i noticed no errors congratulations

it was great

dreadis wrote:

i noticed no errors congratulations

it was great

Thank you ^^