Fanak (Fennec Kitsune)

Fanak
Habitat
Fanak is a race of Kitsune that can be found in places with open space like Akaptor Desert and Great Rocky Fields.


In Akaptor Desert, they live and travel together with Akaptor Nomads.


It is rare to see them in places where lack open space, like the jungles and cities.




Racial Characteristics
Unlike other races of Kitsune, Fanak are smaller in stature. They have shorter in height and their physical strength is even weaker than that of normal kitsunes. However, their body is adapted to survive and travel long distances in harsh environments like deserts by keeping water loss at the minimum.


The fur of their ears and tail is bright in colors.


Another visible difference is that desert kitsunes has a pair of large and long ears, as big as their faces. Together with their small body, these ears make them look cute and child-like. But these ears are not just for show: they can pick up the faintest noise from far away, and are able to filter out information from environment extremely quickly. For example, they can hear a dozen people talking in a closed room simultaneously, while still being able to hear someone dropping a needle on the street outside. However, their extraordinary sense makes them more vulnerable against sound-based attacks.


Their vocal structure allows them make diverse kinds of sound. With this ability, they can change their own voices, mimick animal's noises, and let out of a ear-deafening shriek.


Like normal kitsunes, Fanaks often have more than one tail, depending on their lineage and magical power. The stronger they become in term of magic, the more tails they have.


Fanaks do not have the attractive scent as strong as other kitsunes. The reason is that their scent gland is not as developed. Though they still smell somewhat nice, they don't have the alluring scent capable to alter people's mind.




Abilities
Like other kitsunes, Fanak is capable magic users. Their magic of choice is wind-based, which they use expertly in open space. They also have a natural talent for illusion magic to trick people when needed. Their specialization, however, lies in enchantment magic.


Their art of enchantment excels enough that they enchant virtually everything physical from inorganic items to organic body parts, both permanently and temporarily. The drawback is that the enchantment often has side effects when using on living creatures, such as suffering serious muscle pain after muscle enchantment spell wears off. For this reason they tend to avoid temporarily enchanting anything organic and focus more on permanent item enchantment. Items that enchanted by Fanak are highly sought-after for their high quality and permanent effects, such as flying carpets, rustproof and wornproof weapons, etc. However, best ones are usually imported from Akaptor Desert, making these items very rare and pricey. This also leads to fake Fanak-enchanted products in the market.


Their extraordinary hearing sense allows them to detect faintest noises from a long distance, so it is not a wise idea to badmouth or speak of a plan against a Fanak unless you are a few miles away from the target. Fanak is also very good at eavesdropping. In a direct interaction, Fanaks can know whether someone lies or not by hearing the heartbeat. Finally, in combat, unless completely moving in absolute silence, it is very difficult to ambush a Fanak.


Next, Fanak can adjust the sound and the frequency of their voice depending on the purpose. For example, by talking with a sweet voice at a frequency that makes the listeners feel happy, their voice sounds nice and addicting to listen to, allowing Fanaks to easily convince people to do something for them. Or when they want to threaten someone, they speak with a harsh voice with a fear-inflicting frequency, making the listeners feel overwhelmed and have to accept their terms. Not only that, Fanaks can also enchant their vocal chords in order to achieve better results, but such an act is considered cheating among Fanaks and like mentioned earlier, organic enchantment can cause side-effects.


Social behavior
Fanaks have a strange weakness: they have claustrophobia, and often avoid visiting cramped places, like narrow alleys, crowded streets and closed buildings. When being imprisoned in a cramped place, they will grow panicked and may actually die. For this reason, they prefer living in open space like Akaptor Desert and places that does not have closed and solid walls, like tents. When having business inside small buildings, they feel more comfortable when staying near windows or entrances.


Their moral teaching often revolves around freedom, lessening the sadistic nature that is often found on other kitsune races and allowing them to have a little more respect for other people's freedom. However, lesser sadists are still sadists, so if there is an opportunity for them to make someone dance on their palms, they still gladly take it.


While looking cute, Fanak is actually a scheming folk and would not lend out their hand without expecting something in return. Their relationship with Akaptor Nomads is also thought to be the same: long time ago, when Fanak first immigrated in Felarya, the Nomads taught them how to survive. So in turn, Fanak offers their abilities to the Nomads to boost both races' defense against the harsh nature. But, it is difficult to know whether the relationship is mutual, because kitsune species are known for manipulating people, so the Fanak might try to do the same on the Nomads when the opportunity appears. Therefore, though they are still living together in harmony, the Nomads keep an eye on the Fanak folk.


About culture, since Fanaks have being lived together with Akaptor Nomads for a long time, most of their traditions and customs are shared with that of the Nomads. However, Fanaks still keep some trace of Kitsune traditions, such as celebrating whether a new tail sprouts out and the habit to make everything they obsess over an art.


Still, not every culture of Akaptor Nomads is absorbed by Fanaks. For example, the Nomads are famous for being able to use on stilts as a way to avoid touching the deadly sand of Akaptor Desert. Fanaks, in the other hand, have trouble walking with stilts and are often made fun of by other species when they do, so they sought other ways to keep them from the sand, like flying carpet and levitation boots.


While Fanaks can let out an eardrum-shattering shriek, adults consider this sound very embarrassing, and never let anyone hear it. The shriek is what Fanak children often make when feeling scared or excited, thus it is labeled by adults as a childish sound. Therefore, trying to startling these children is a very bad idea. Some adults, however, accept the embarrassment and train to use the shriek, which can throw their foes off balance in combat.

I'm not feeling too creative, so I'll just point out the English mistakes this time. Maybe after I'm done, I'll think of something.

tkh1304 wrote:

Fanak is a race of Kitsune who can also be found in places with opened space like Akaptor Desert and Great Rocky Fields.

If Fanak is a plural, it should be "Fanak are". If Fanak is singular, that means it's an uncountable noun, like water or rice. And if it's uncountable, you can't use "who", that gets really jarring. You should go for "which".
Also, it's not "opened" spaces, but "open" spaces.

tkh1304 wrote:

In Akaptor Desert, they lives and travel together with Akaptor Nomads.

"They lives" is incorrect because of subject-verb agreement. They is plural 3rd, "lives" is singular. "They live" is better.

tkh1304 wrote:

It is rare to see them in places that lacks of opened space, like the jungles and cities.

Again, subject-verb. "Places that lacks" doesn't work. Places is plural, lacks is singular. And it's not "of opened space", but "open spaces". You don't lack "of" something, you lack "something".

tkh1304 wrote:

Racial Characteristics
Unlike other races, Fanak are smaller in stature. They have shorter height and their physical strength is even weaker than that of normal kitsunes. However, their body is adapted to survive and travel long-distance in harsh environment like deserts by keeping water loss at the minimum.

"Unlike other races, Fanak are smaller in stature." Unclear. Unlike neeras, Fanak are smaller in stature? Smaller than what? Explain, please.
"They have shorter height" doesn't work. In English, we refer to height as "being" a certain height, not as "having" a certain height. "They are shorter" would be more correct.
"Their body is adapted to survive and travel long-distance in harsh environment" doesn't work either. You don't say "harsh environment", you say "harsh environments". Similarly, you don't say "long-distance", but "long distances".

tkh1304 wrote:

The fur of their ears and tail are bright in colors, and less bushy than other kitsune races.

Subject-verb agreement. "The fur (of their ears and tail) are bright" doesn't work. The fur (described) "is" bright.
On the other hand, I see you meant to point out the ears and tail are less bushy too. Fur isn't bushy, it's long. You might want to rephrase.

tkh1304 wrote:

Another visible difference is that desert kitsunes has a pair of large and long ears, as big as their faces. Together with their small body, these ears make them look cute and child-like. But these ears are not for show: they can pick up the faintest noise from a very far distance, and are able to filter out information from noisy environment extremely quickly. For example, they can hear a dozen of people talking in a closed room simultaneously, while still being able to hear someone dropping a needle on the street outside. However, such a hearing makes them more vulnerable against sound-based attacks.

"are not for show". Maybe you meant "aren't just for show"?
"from a very far distance" is odd.
"Filter out information from noisy environment" is strange. Maybe you meant "filter out information from environmental noise"?
"A dozen of X" isn't right. You say "a dozen X", without the of. It's not a dozen of people, it's a dozen people.
"Such a hearing" sounds really odd.

tkh1304 wrote:

Like a normal kitsune, Fanak often has more than one tail, depending on their lineage and magical power. The stronger they become in term of magic, the more tails they have.

Fanak often has? Subject-verb agreement. Is Fanak singular or plural? If it is singular, why aren't you saying "a Fanak" instead of "Fanak"? Otherwise, it looks like Fanak is someone in particular. Or a brand of appliances, Fanak(TM).

tkh1304 wrote:

Fanak does not have the attractive scent as strong as other kitsunes. The reason is that the scent gland is not as developed. Though they still smell somewhat nice, they don't have the alluring scent that is capable to alter people's mind.

It should be THEIR scent gland. And I think they had multiple, so maybe THEIR scent glandS ARE.
Also, rather than saying "the alluring scent that is capable of", you should say "an alluring scent capable of".

tkh1304 wrote:

Abilities
Like other kitsunes, Fanak is capable magic users. Their magic of choice is wind-based, which they use expertly in opened space. They also have natural talent for illusion magic to trick people when needed. Their specialization, however, lies in enchantment magic.

"open" space, as before. "have A natural talent".

tkh1304 wrote:

Their art of enchantment excels enough that they enchant virtually everything physical from inorganic items to organic body parts, both permanently and temporarily. The drawback is that the enchantment often has side effects when using on living creatures, such as post-exhaust muscle enchantment, so they tend to avoid temporarily enchanting anything organic and focus more on permanent item enchantment. Items that enchanted by Fanak are highly sought-after for their high quality and permanent effects, such as flying carpets, rustproof and wornproof weapons, etc. However, best ones are usually imported from Akaptor Desert, making these items very rare and pricey. This also leads to fake Fanak-enchanted products in the market.

"Post-exhaust muscle enchantment"? I don't understand. Maybe you meant "exhaustion after exertion"? In that case, you're gonna need a whole sentence to describe the enchantment.

tkh1304 wrote:

Their extraordinary hearing sense allows them to detect faintest noises from a long distance, so it is not a wise idea to badmouth or speaking of a plan against a Fanak unless one is a few miles away from the target. Needless to say, Fanak is also very good at spying, no matter how faint a whisper can be uttered. In a direct interaction, Fanak can know whether someone lies or not by hearing the heartbeat. Finally, in combat, unless completely moving in absolute silence, it is very difficult to ambush a Fanak.

"It is not a wise idea to [...] or speakING"? You should use the infinitive form here. "It is not a wise idea TO BADMOUTH or SPEAK OF a plan". Furthermore, you might want to use the "you" demonstrative instead of the "one" demonstrative. "Unless you are a few miles away from the target".
Needless to say, "Fanak is also very good at spying, no matter how faint a whisper can be uttered". You should go instead with "Fanak are also very good at eavesdropping", or drop the second part of the sentence. If they're good at spying no matter how faint a whisper can be uttered, that sounds like listening is all there is to spying.
Again, you should decide whether Fanak is singular or plural.

tkh1304 wrote:

Next, Fanak can adjust the sound and the frequency of their voice depending on the purpose. For example, by talking with a sweet voice at a frequency that makes the listeners feel happy, their voice sounds nice and addicting to listen to, allowing Fanak to convince people doing something for them. Or when they want to threaten someone, they speak with a harsh voice with a fear-inflicting frequency, making the listeners feel overwhelmed and accept their terms. Not only that, Fanak can also enchant their vocal chords in order to achieve better results, but such an act is considered cheating among Fanaks and like having mentioned above, organic enchantment can cause side-effects.

"Convince people doing something for them", sounds like "convince (people doing something for them)", or taking people who are doing something for them, and convincing them of something. You should instead try "convince people TO DO something for them".
"like having mentioned above" doesn't work. You should go with "Like mentioned above", or "like mentioned earlier".
"Fanaks". So Fanak is singular? If so, you should use "A Fanak", or else it sounds like the whole article is talking about a single kitsune whose name is Fanak.

tkh1304 wrote:

Social behaviorFanak has a strange weakness: they have claustrophobia, and often avoid visit cramped places, like narrow alleys, crowded streets and closed buildings. When being imprisoned in a cramped place, they will become panic and may actually die. For this reason, they prefer living in opened space like Akaptor Desert, and their teaching often revolves around freedom, lessening the sadistic nature that is often found on other kitsune races and allowing them to have a little more respect on other people's freedom. However, lesser sadists are still sadists, so if there is an opportunity for them to make someone dance on their hands, they still gladly take it.

"avoid visit"? Do they avoid, or do they "avoid visiting"?
"they will become panic"? "They will panic" or "they will grow panicked"?
They prefer living in OPEN spaces. Also, we already know they live in the Akaptor. You should point out they like large dwellings, or that they camp out in the open whenever possible, or that they prefer gathering in parks when in cities, or that they use tents because they don't like having walls they can't rip out with their claws.
Their teaching(s) often revolvE around freedom. Also, it's not "respect on", but "respect for".
I think you meant "dance on their palm".

tkh1304 wrote:

While looking cute, Fanak is actually a scheming folk and would not lend out their hand without expecting something in return. Their relationship with Akaptor Nomads is also thought to be the same: long time ago, when Fanak first immigrated in Felarya, the Nomads teach them how to survive. So in turn, Fanak offers their abilities to the Nomads to boost both races' defense against the harsh nature. But, it is difficult to know if whether the relationship is mutual or because it is just a win-win solution for both races, and the Fanak will betray the Nomads when they grow strong enough to become independent. Thus, though they live together, the Nomads often keep an eye of Fanak folk.

This time, you need to change it to "Fanaks are", or "The Fanak are" (if they refer to themselves as "The Fanak". Maybe?).
"The Nomads teach them how to survive". I think you mean "The Nomads taught them how to survive."
"It is difficult to know if whether" doesn't exist. The correct form is "It's difficult to know whether".
Also, I don't get the rest of the sentence. What do you mean by "mutual", or "just a win-win"? And why would the Fanak betray the nomads? Kitsunes of all varieties are supposedly very happy about having plenty of dunces of other species to trick into doing their menial chores.
"The nomads often keep an eye of"? I think you meant "Keep an eye ON".

tkh1304 wrote:

About culture, since Fanak have being lived together with Akaptor Nomads for a long time, most of their traditions and customs are shared with that of the Nomads. However, Fanak still keeps some trace of Kitsune traditions, such as celebrating whether a new tail sprouts out and the habit to make everything they obsess an art.

"everything they obsess" means they obsess things. As in, this guy got a teapot, and now the teapot is obsessed with something.
"everything they obsess over" would be better.

tkh1304 wrote:

Still, not every culture of Akaptor Nomads is absorbed by Fanak. For example, the Nomads are famous for being able to use on stilts before even knowing how to walk as a way to avoid touching the deadly sand of Akaptor Desert. Fanak, in the other hand, have trouble walking with stilts and are often made fun of by other species when they do, so they annoyedly sought other ways to keep them from the sand, like flying carpet and levitation boots.

tkh1304 wrote:

While Fanak can let out an eardrum-shattering shriek, adults consider this sound very embarrassing and never let anyone hear it, because it is the sound that their children often makes when feeling scared or excited. Needless to say, jumping in the middle of Fanak children and startling them is a very bad idea. Some adult, however, accepts the embarrassment and train to use the shriek, which throws their foes off balance in combat.

Again, when talking about the race's powers, use "Fanaks can", or "A Fanak can".
"Their children often makes". "Their children often make", because of subject-verb agreement.

"Some adult accepts" sounds very strange, almost like you're insulting a particular adult. "Some adults accept" would be better.

^Editted. Thank for pointing them out : )

Ilceren wrote:

I don't have much to add either. Seems like a cool idea, and most people who know about fennecs love them, so I expect there to be quite a good number liking this race. A pity they are located so far from Negav, though XD

While most of them avoid crowded settlements, Fanaks may sometimes be seen working as traders, enchanters or scholars in Negav too. They are scheming people who loves profits and knowledge. Beware when talking to Fanaks, as their persuading voice can make you folk out more money/information than you intend : P

If they choose to stay in Negav then they will prefer to stay on top of a building where it has open space, or in places wilth spacious greenery. Fanak traders are often rich foxes... I mean, folk XD

I agree with Icle and stabs, pretty cool idea for a kitsune, you explain it to me before but i really dig this