The Funniest Felaryan Feast EVER thread

I already spoke about my funniest Felaryan feast ever...

Crisis and Menyssan in their second great eating contest, referee'd by Gunther. The feast: an army of movie-version Starship Troopers rushing through a dimensional gate to conquer a new land.

Next up...

Cartoon version GI Joe follows Cobra's army fleeing through a dimensional rift right into fairy territory...

Comic-version Valhallan warriors charging through a dimensional rift from Asgard.

Oh, wait... that might actually be a fight.

The Aqua Teens are sucked through a portal in the drain of Carl's pool into Felarya, landing right in the vicinity of Anna.

Anna: "I haven't had junk food since I was human!" ^_^

Aqua Teens: O_O;;;;;;;

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Comic-version Valhallan warriors charging through a dimensional rift from Asgard.

Oh, wait... that might actually be a fight.

Why is it that every time I read this I think of a Capital One commercial where the guy says "What's in YOUR wallet!" while Vivian is gulping down warriors in the background?

"SPARTANS! TONIGHT WE ARE DINED UPON IN HELL! Wait, that's not right..."

Menyssan: "Oh yes it is..."

Feign wrote:

"SPARTANS! TONIGHT WE ARE DINED UPON IN HELL! Wait, that's not right..."

Menyssan: "Oh yes it is..."

LOL!!!

Captain Jack Sparrow and the Black Pearl's crew lead the British Navy on a merry chase into Anko's territory...

"This is Captain Kirk, ensign Ricky do you read me?"

"For the Gor people, we shall invade this lan-"

Pacman w/ Power Pellet v Naga's tail. Which finishes first, the pellet's effect or the Naga's tail?

Crisis: Who are you?

Wonder twins: Wonder twin powers activate. For the love of god be something useful!!!

Darkfire destiny wrote:

Crisis: Who are you?

Wonder twins: Wonder twin powers activate. For the love of god be something useful!!!

For once the one that turns into a bucket of water winds up safe as the biological one is eaten by the hungry predator.

You know what? That explains it. The two were originally separated at birth, and he was raised on Felarya.

Duke Nukem: I'll rip off your head and shit down your neck.
Pred: ...Or you could just slide down there.
Duke: Ah, crap.

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Duke Nukem: I'll rip off your head and shit down your neck.
Pred: ...Or you could just slide down there.
Duke: Ah, crap.

Maybe that'll be in Duke Nukem Forever.

Master Chief flies through the wrong portal and ends up in Felarya...
MC: "I'm here to finish the fight!"
Vivian: "You're going to finish my meal..."

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Duke Nukem: I'll rip off your head and shit down your neck.
Pred: ...Or you could just slide down there.
Duke: Ah, crap.

Duke: Ah, crap.
Pred: No, that's afterwards.

Anakin's Padawan, Ahsoka Tano (who, may I add, is one of the cutest Jedi since Yoda), leads an army of Republic clones after General Grievous and the Seperatist forcea straight into Felarya.

Ahsoka-(looking up at Crisis) I... think I'm gonna need a bigger saber.

Crisis-I think I'm gonna need a bigger stomach!

Ahsoka-Aw, Sithspit!

Okay, those last three posts were great. XD

Speaking of Star Wars: The Chiss Expansionary Defense Fleet comes across Felarya... I mean, Thrawn's tactics would become so legendary, he'd go up against Menyssan, much like a certain tactics-ninja did.

Except that Thrawn would OWN.

Oh, wait, that wasn't that funny...

Warning: Bad dynasty warriors joke ahead.

Over a pile of corpses, one man stands tall. He turns to the beautiful naga.

Lu Bu: There are none who can stand before me!

Vivian knocks away his weapon and picks him up.

Vivian: I'm not standing. I don't have leg's!

Lu Bu: No fair winning by technicallity.

Mario and Luigi, rushing off to save the princess again. They step through a portal anf ind themselves in a scary land. The come across a cave and hear a scream from inside.

Luigi: Looks lik a pretty tight fit Mario.

Mario: Luigi. We travel through sewer pipes. This is pretty roomy.

They enter as the Dyad swallows them.

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Okay, those last three posts were great. XD

Speaking of Star Wars: The Chiss Expansionary Defense Fleet comes across Felarya... I mean, Thrawn's tactics would become so legendary, he'd go up against Menyssan, much like a certain tactics-ninja did.

Except that Thrawn would OWN.

Oh, wait, that wasn't that funny...

Yes, it was. If he were an Incubi, him and her would be at it like rabbits.

Malahite wrote:

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Okay, those last three posts were great. XD

Speaking of Star Wars: The Chiss Expansionary Defense Fleet comes across Felarya... I mean, Thrawn's tactics would become so legendary, he'd go up against Menyssan, much like a certain tactics-ninja did.

Except that Thrawn would OWN.

Oh, wait, that wasn't that funny...

Yes, it was. If he were an Incubi, him and her would be at it like rabbits.

*imagines Thrawn as an incubus* Ewwwww... that's just disgusting. Hentai involving Thrawn is not good hentai.

Except for the "blueballs" jokes.

Funnily enough, even on the topic of Incubi Hentai Thrawn we can still be potentially on topic when it comes to 'feasting'. And in two separate ways, too!

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Okay, those last three posts were great. XD

Speaking of Star Wars: The Chiss Expansionary Defense Fleet comes across Felarya... I mean, Thrawn's tactics would become so legendary, he'd go up against Menyssan, much like a certain tactics-ninja did.

Except that Thrawn would OWN.

Oh, wait, that wasn't that funny...

The fleet wouldn't reach Felarya. He'd have to pay the Miratans to get in. He'd also have to study Succubi artwork first. Menyssan would have the initiative against him. Fatal advantage.

Team Fortress 2 Red Team in Felarya.

Heavy: WAAAA! CRYY SOME MOOORE! *shoots his machine gun which bounce off od Crisis.
Scout: BOINK! *hits Crisis with his bat* BONK! *hits Crisis with his bat*
Spy: *attempts to assassinate Crisis behind her back*
Pyro: MMMMHHH MMMMHH MMMMHH! (muffled insults) *shoots his fire at Crisis*
Soldier: DIE MAGGOT! *shoots his rocket launcher at Crisis*
Medic: *attempts to shoot Crisis wih syringes*
Demoman: I'M A BLACK SCOTTISH CYCLOPES!!! FEAR ME YEW WENCH!!!!! *shoots his grenade launcher at Crisis*
Sniper: *attempts to headshot Crisis* THE HEADSHOT WON'T WORK!? I CAN'T SAY "BOOM HEADSHOT!!!"

Crisis is utterly confused, and eats them all in one go anyway.

Raveolution wrote:

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Okay, those last three posts were great. XD

Speaking of Star Wars: The Chiss Expansionary Defense Fleet comes across Felarya... I mean, Thrawn's tactics would become so legendary, he'd go up against Menyssan, much like a certain tactics-ninja did.

Except that Thrawn would OWN.

Oh, wait, that wasn't that funny...

The fleet wouldn't reach Felarya. He'd have to pay the Miratans to get in. He'd also have to study Succubi artwork first. Menyssan would have the initiative against him. Fatal advantage.

Thrawn doesn't need to study the art, it just helps a lot. He can observe battle tactics for a few seconds, then immediately formulate a strategy, like in Outbound Flight, against the Vagaari and the Trade Federation droids.

...Thrawn also has a pretty good-sized armada with him. I dunno if the Miratans would want to mess with even that. The question is, how many ground troops does he have? After all, Felarya has no real exosphere for the ships to fly in...

ZionAtriedes wrote:

...Thrawn also has a pretty good-sized armada with him.

I can change that with a small freighter with an experimental cloaking device paired with a good store of nuclear weapons and a simple hacking device---the plan? Sneak aboard a large ship, nuke it (and possibly the surrounding ships in a shockwave), as everyone is investigating, yoink a cruiser and escape.

...of course it would work out better in theory than in practice.

Actually, Thrawn (or, rather, his fleet) experimented with a cloaking device before. At least, I think that was Thrawn. I know some Imperials did in the years following the Battle of Endor. I'm semi-sure it was indeed Mitth'raw'nuruodo (Thrawn) and his fleet. It didn't work out too well.

And, if Thrawn has the Joruus C'Baoth clone, he can detect cloaked ships with the Force. (By the way, Outbound Flight had the original Jorus C'Baoth. Yes, the clone had two u's in his name, the original had one.)

ZionAtriedes wrote:

Thrawn doesn't need to study the art, it just helps a lot. He can observe battle tactics for a few seconds, then immediately formulate a strategy, like in Outbound Flight, against the Vagaari and the Trade Federation droids.

...Thrawn also has a pretty good-sized armada with him. I dunno if the Miratans would want to mess with even that. The question is, how many ground troops does he have? After all, Felarya has no real exosphere for the ships to fly in...

But there is no way to bombard Felarya from orbit. How would Thrawn's armada be useful? Can they fly in atmosphere?