Silent Eric's Zany Ideas

Book Wyrms
Massive serpents with the ability to alter their size in order to burrow their way into books, their dwelling of choice. They typically eat the inside of a tome over the course of several decades sustaining itself off of the contents of the pulp and ink in the paper. They only return to their full size when said book is opened, at which point they quickly enlarge, devour the shocked would-be-reader and quickly return from whence they came.
This made libraries less then popular in Felarya.

Perhaps they should be some type of fairy instead? What do you guys think?


Dire Goldfish
Identical to a regular goldfish, except one odd thing: anyone left alone in a room with one has their headless and bloody corpse discovered soon afterwards.

Not surprisingly, I like it.

Dire Goldfish loks like something Count D would sell.

"Welcome to my petshop."


Ah Eric, nice to see you back in the game!

I like those book wyrms a lot

Oh dear sweet Elven Goddess. I fell all the way to the second page? What's happened to me. Something must be done!



Time to turn the Zany-ness up to eleven.

Not really that zany, but here is my overdue write up of the introduction for Felarya's religions wiki page.



Because Felarya is connected to so many dimensions, it is only natural that it be a melting pot of religions. No place is this more true than Negav. There, Othemites live next door to followers of Khord, and various smaller cults hide in the shadows, whether they worship a living being on Felarya such as the Seekers of Sineria or the Sleeping Darkness, two groups that want to revive Sineria and Déméchrelle respectively, or the groups that seek infernal power, worshipping and praying to demons for personal power such as the Disciples of Kallisti the Dark Goddess. Although such cults are illegal in Negav, and most other cities, the Magiocrats turn a blind eye to such behavior, reasoning that the more divided their people, the less likely they will revolt against them.

But religions do more than just affect politics on Felarya. In Heaven and Hell angels and demons have modeled their societies upon the religions of the races on Felarya. When a person on Felarya dies, they are taken by an angel or demon to a section of Heaven or Hell that reflects their beliefs in life. Archmage Talbeln Veridimus had written a highly controversial theory on the nature of heaven, which was further extrapolated by Qwi-te, a neko shaman spiritchaser, whose ‘firsthand’ tale of Heaven and Hell’s ‘grand illusion’ has only served to discredit the archmage Talbeln Veridimus’ theory. The two have been declared heretics by one hundred and thirty two religions.

Of course, predators have their own religions, although theirs are much less structured than the smaller races. They usually consist of a series of basic guidelines to life in Felarya, passed from parents to children. Many predators follow a religion without knowing that they do! There are some exceptions, such as the Predator Trinity, with gods and goddesses and an amount of organization. There have even been reports of predator priestesses performing strange rituals. For some reason, many of these rituals, and in fact entire religions, that the predators follow seem to have an odd focus on eating…

Talbeln seems to be credited for a lot of theories doesn't he?

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Many predators follow a religion without knowing that they do! There are some exceptions, such as the Predator Trinity, with gods and goddesses and an amount of organization.

I would imagine that conflicts could arise from the difference in names and not the subject matter that the religions believe in XD

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In Heaven and Hell angels and demons have modeled their societies upon the religions of the races on Felarya

huh?

Quote :

Because Felarya is connected to so many dimensions, it is only natural that it be a melting pot of religions.

I can just imagine a few organizations fighting each other on the doorstep as to whom introduces themselves first. (ever had a jahova's witness or morman show up unexpectedly at your doorstep?)
and probably a religion called "the accepting ones" who just try and be all athiest about it, and declare it as a religion so no one can bother them about it XD

likewise, the cults that want to revive demechrelle and sinaria are free to try. i'll just laugh my ass off when they get eaten.

Archmage_Bael wrote:

Talbeln seems to be credited for a lot of theories doesn't he?

Quote :

Many predators follow a religion without knowing that they do! There are some exceptions, such as the Predator Trinity, with gods and goddesses and an amount of organization.

I would imagine that conflicts could arise from the difference in names and not the subject matter that the religions believe in XD

Quote :

In Heaven and Hell angels and demons have modeled their societies upon the religions of the races on Felarya

huh?

Quote :

Because Felarya is connected to so many dimensions, it is only natural that it be a melting pot of religions.

I can just imagine a few organizations fighting each other on the doorstep as to whom introduces themselves first. (ever had a jahova's witness or morman show up unexpectedly at your doorstep?)
and probably a religion called "the accepting ones" who just try and be all athiest about it, and declare it as a religion so no one can bother them about it XD

likewise, the cults that want to revive demechrelle and sinaria are free to try. i'll just laugh my ass off when they get eaten.

Fun facts

1: No no no, you misunderstand. When a predator follows a religion without realizing, that just means they follow the tenets without knowing the name, or that others do the same. But ones like the Predator Trinity are different. They have organization, so they have the same name, no conflict needed.

2: It's in the wiki. Angels and Demons shape their society on Felarya's religions. For example. There is an angel who calls himself Oth and is the ruler of the Othemite section of Heaven.

3: Yes, the religions do have quite a bit of conflict. Hence why the Magiocrats let them fight so no one gets any ideas about taking over Negav from them.

4: Seekers of Sineria are actually sanctioned and even sometimes trained or outfitted by dridders themselves. So dridders actually don't eat the Seekers.

1: what about coming up with a particular idea first? there are so many religions in felarya that some probably overlap the same beliefs with different names without realizing it because there are thousands of relgions in it in the first place

2: So Oth gets his ideas from mortals? why in the world would beings in heaven and hell get their ideas from them? unless they just play on the lies to make themselves feel great.

3: I meant that as a lulz

4: If they find demechrelle, would she just sleep eat them? XP

Archmage_Bael wrote:

1: what about coming up with a particular idea first? there are so many religions in felarya that some probably overlap the same beliefs with different names without realizing it because there are thousands of relgions in it in the first place

2: So Oth gets his ideas from mortals? why in the world would beings in heaven and hell get their ideas from them? unless they just play on the lies to make themselves feel great.

3: I meant that as a lulz

4: If they find demechrelle, would she just sleep eat them? XP

2: No, read my thread on Deities and Devils. That helps explain it. Beings in heaven and hell shape their world around Felarya's religions so when they take dead people there, they can give out the proper emotions the angels and demons feed on. Oth is just a powerful angel who took that name to keep up the illusion.

4: Well yeah. But Sineria would be different. Demechrelle or her dark minions would likely eat even her own followers.

1: ... What? This is an introduction to the Religion page for the wiki. I can't go into detail for specific religions. This is just what they are in Felarya.

Here is my first draft for the dialouge given by Qwi-te, the neko spiritwalker mentioned in the intro for religions. Let me know what you think, and what you are confused on. This is to help define what Heaven, Hell, and death in Felarya are like. As just a theory, since it's a first person narrative. Anyway, this is as far as i got before getting tired, so let me know how I can refine it. Cheers!



I have been the chief shaman for the Brazen Claw tribe for fifty years, and an apprentice for a hundred before that. We have long survived the wilderness of Felarya without the benefit of human technology. We rely on the old ways, and the strength of our Circle of Shamans. I am proud to say that after years of training, our shamans can even converse with spirits and have them warn us of impending danger each day. And as the head shaman, my responsibilities, and to be immodest, my abilities are far beyond the rest of the Circle.
I can walk the paths unseen, sending my spirit from my body into the spirit realm. I do this every time one of our tribesmen dies. Many times it is difficult, and dangerous, to track the predator who has devoured our kin, as there are very few times there is a body to recover. In these cases, I am forced to send forth my spirit to recover the fallen spirit of our comrade. Time is of the essence however, as the spirit will linger with it's body for only a week. And even then, the spirit world has a host of it's own predators and scavengers who would love to devour, destroy, or otherwise steal a helpless neko spirit. Yes, it's true, even in death you are not safe from predation. The bright side, if you would need one, is that for the week your spirit has no consciousness, so if your spirit is destroyed, you won't notice.
But you see why as soon as the spirits inform the Circle of a kinsman's death, his recovery is paramount. I can't say how many times I've had to enter a pred to save the spirit of an ally. While spirits are immaterial of course, I still feel the need to bathe after rooting through some predator's digestive workings... Anyway, I won't go into any detail.
Nekos in our tribe tell the Circle what they want done with their spirits when they are gone. Many choose to join the legion of protective spirits, speaking to our shamans and spying on our foes, protecting the tribe even after death. Some, usually young men, want their spirit melded with another, usually their crush. I must admit, all involved feel very touched when we feed the neko's spirit to their beloved's, combining the souls of the two lovers. Very romantic.
I do, however, respect any wish. Despite my warnings, there are sometimes nekos who succumb to temptation and wish to go to heaven or, even worse but thankfully more rarely, hell. I know those of you who have not walked the spiritual pathways and seen the false splendor of heaven and the dark realm of hell may be inclined to believe the many many sugared words of the various religion's views of heaven. I'm sure you've heard the tales, a paradise, free from predators, eternal pleasure and beautiful winged women. And the tales of Hell as well from the cults who engage in demon worship, proclaiming pleasure, power, and a personal succubus to cater to your every whim.
Technically, they are mostly true, but there are dark machinations behind it all. Both Heaven and Hell are spiritual traps, farms for spiritual energy where angels and demons alike feed like leeches from the emotions of the spirits in their thrall. I will start in heaven, and keep in mind that all that I say are things that I have seen myself, whether on the exploratory spiritwalks of my youth, or guiding my tribesmen who wish to spend eternity in those realms. Heaven has based itself on the religions followed in Felarya. There are inummerable realms, each based on a different idea of heaven. I have seen with my own eyes, angels taking the souls from the recently dead, and taking them to whatever religion they might have followed in life. There, they spend their eternity in whatever form of bliss their religion taught them. All the while, the angels take nourishment from the positive energies produced by the spirit's happiness. The angels excel at illusion and will appear as Gods or Goddesses as well to them, pretending to be what they'd expect to see in heaven. And of course, they make no distinction, taking the souls of predators to their own version of heaven.
Hell is different, they have their own set of planes, and seem not to care about Felaryan views of Hell. Although it is just as horrifying. I'd rather not get into detail, but they torture spirits in various ways, and when they are done, they devour them. I've spent as little time in that dangerous place as I could....

I like it. However, as for the view of how heaven and hell should be, that's something I really dont know how to respond. The way you wrote it is very well done.

Still, if he becomes a spirit as well, how does he avoid digestion if being a spirit or a body doesn't matter? In an intro you wouldn't want to list every process in detail, but it still irks me.

Other than that, the view of heaven and hell I dont have an opinion on.

Archmage_Bael wrote:

I like it. However, as for the view of how heaven and hell should be, that's something I really dont know how to respond. The way you wrote it is very well done.

Still, if he becomes a spirit as well, how does he avoid digestion if being a spirit or a body doesn't matter? In an intro you wouldn't want to list every process in detail, but it still irks me.

Other than that, the view of heaven and hell I dont have an opinion on.

Well, luckily all this is just a theory, so that leaves it open to interpretation. Maybe it's not true, but maybe it is. Most Felaryans certainly don't believe it.

As for avoiding digestion, he'd have to be eaten by an angel, devil, or other spiritual predator, like a ghost perhaps. But a spirit, being immaterial, would not be affected by acid. What he's saying is that he just walks straight into the pred to find the remains. And don't worry, this isn't the intro. I already did the intro. This should cover everything that needs covering.

I am so bored. Let me type letters and see what comes out. Lessee...

Floog

A Floog is a small, squishy creature found in the many marshes and swamps across Battal. Although at first sight it appears slimy and unappetizing, when washed, seasoned, battered and fried it becomes a delicious snack known as a Battered Floog Bar, which due to its relatively low cost production technique is often served, heavily salted and fragmented in baskets, as a gratis bar snack at many inns and taverns such as the Lit Ciggy.

General Tso's Chicken

A cunning bird that mobilizes in groups and makes use of incredibly complicated and deadly strategy when defending from predators. It is extremely delicious, and also a worthy opponent for any human army.

John Deer

A species of Deer native to the Ecifur Valley. They are identifiable by several characteristics, chiefly their very large, scoop-like antlers which are used to move earth. It mostly feeds on grubs it finds in the dirt it upturns. Built with powerful forelegs, and a thick, orange-brown hide with reddish coloring around its neck. It has a distinctive cry that sounds something like "Y'all". Violent, but incredibly stupid. It is known to attack elves on sight, for no real reason. Useful as beasts of burden, it is the only creature on Felarya that can feed and thrive on the toxic grimworm.

Hehe funny ideas !
I think your take on afterlife seen by the shaman is really interesting ^_^ although he better watch his back if he ever goes to Negav after that XD
As well as that of a tribe being defended by spirits. It's very intriguing

And now, the newest book hitting the bookstores of Negav! Go to your local Ever-Merchant and get one today!

Burning Desire


The saucy story of the forbidden romance between a neko and a neera in a fairy's stomach. Although the book starts out, and doesn't really leave that setting, the book is longer than you might think. Written by an anonymous human in Negav, the book has become extraordinarily popular. The neko community however dislikes the book, as it extends the false rumor that neera are in fact intelligent and not just a tasty snack. However, many small groups of nekos are in fact fans of the book, and a cult of nekos has arisen who do rather naughty things with neeras instead of, and sometimes before eating them.

Here we go. A work in progress, here's what I have so far. It's a legend for the wiki about the elves, and a kingdom they had. It details how they split into so many different races of elf, and the rise of the Giant Elves, as well as the origin for the animosity the elves feel towards each other. Keep in mind this is something that happened a long long long time ago, so the elves wouldn't really have cities like this anymore, though once it is canon, your characters can come across the overgrown remains of what was once a beautiful elven city. So here you go.

The Legend of [Insert Elven Kingdom name here]

Throughout the history of Felarya, there have been numerous kingdoms. These kingdoms will typically hold for a few years, perhaps a century at most, before collapsing and succumbing to the hardships of Felarya. Many kingdoms are transported from another dimension, and these will normally fall within hours, their inhabitants completely unprepared fro the dangers of Felarya. However, there was one kingdom that lasted centuries in Felarya, and that was the kingdom of the mysterious race of elves.

They built beautiful yet muted cities. Hidden through superior engineering and sorcery, the cities survived by stealth rather than pure might. The elves were master woodsmen, and mages as well and effectively camouflaged their cities from all non-elves. Small bands of elves would also patrol the outskirts of the cities, redirecting the preds away from the city using bait and flee tactics, with themselves as the bait! In this way, the kingdom thrived, and even grew, smaller outpost cities popping up across the continent until the kingdom stretched loosely from the coast of the Topazial Sea to the Evernight Forest and the edge of the Dridder Forest, although they avoided entering the kingdoms of the fairies and the dridders.

The kingdom of Elves was actually set up as a series of city states, and they had a good amount of freedom in how they were set up. It was this that first started the elves into dividing into the many races they consist of today. But, 1,000 years before the rise of Ur Sagol, the elven kingdom underwent what the elves call, The Sundering. They fell not to preds, nor to another race, but to themselves.


To be Continued.

hmm. interesting. I dont know what to say about it...except the amounts of kingdoms and cities have warped in, trying to survive felarya XD

Burning Desire sounds interesting... but I wonder how the heck the book would be as long as you make it seem... they're in a fairy's gut being digested alive for crying out loud. After a few minutes they'd be too weak to do anything and they'd be liquified.

As for the Elven Kingdom thing I think that's interesting as well...

And the Found Cake is genius.

What is this thread doing on page three? You guys should be constantly commenting on the incredible ideas and concepts put in here. Well, fine. I'll put a new thing in here. But I'm doing it begrudgingly. You guys are on notice. Ha ha, anyway;



Hemogoblins
Size: 3 foot drones, 5 foot workers, 10 foot soldiers, and 100 foot queens
Threat: Low alone, to Moderate in groups to Very High for queen

Hemogoblins are a type of blood elemental, and are a common threat in the Jungle of Perils, although they are extremely rare, though not unheard of in other places in Felarya. Hemogoblins come in several variations, from the small drone to the giant queen. A single hemogoblin drone or even a worker poses no threat to all but the weakest travelers. However, they rarely attack alone, preferring to move in small swarms known as "clots". A clot typically consists of 3 to 10 drones and a single worker.


In the wild, hemogoblins form a surprisingly sophisticated social structure, similar to ants or wasps. Dozens of clots (or even hundreds, for large nests), scour well-worn paths through the underbrush looking for food (and the occasional unwary traveler) to bring back to the nest. The nest consists of a network of clay or stone "mounds", at the center of which a single Queen is guarded by a number of large, vicious Warriors.


A hemogoblin drone is simply a small orb of blood, not even intelligent. They are directed by the larger drones, which vary in shape, but tend towards a humanoid shape. The warriors are much larger than a human, but still smaller than many predators in the Jungle of Perils. They also differ in shape, but tend towards monsterous forms with bladed limbs and terrible jaws. They also differ from any other form of hemogoblin in that they are white in color, rather than red. The queen is truly huge, and stay in either of two forms, a huge lake of blood, or a disturbingly feminine form.
The queen is unique in it's intelligence and capability for speech. It is also the only hemogoblin capable of digesting prey. There has been speculation that the all other forms of hemogoblins are simply extensions of the queen, and not elementals in their own right. Queens grow over time, and change color from a vibrant red, to a dark black red over centuries.


When a clot encounters prey, the drones will attempt to weigh down the potential food, and engulf it, allowing the drone to carry it back to the mound. Warriors attack all intruders, unless they are covered in the drones. They stand aside to let the queen's meal pass. In the central chamber, deep under the earth, the meal is brought before a massive lake of blood, which forms into the female shape of the queen. The drone presents the food, and the queen swallows it whole, drones included. After the food is digested, more drones can be produced. Warriors and workers are able to absorb drones for sustinence. In this way, the hive grows. Warriors and workers are also created by the queen, although this is done much less often. Queens almost never leave their mound.


Hemogoblins are usually the first summon spell learned by a Blood Mage.




And there you go. I think that's everything on that idea. Let me know if there are anything I can clarify or elaborate on for this new species.

Silent_eric wrote:

Hemogoblins are a type of blood elemental

Really, what the hell?

Anime-Junkie wrote:

Silent_eric wrote:

Hemogoblins are a type of blood elemental

Really, what the hell?

What? I mean, elementals are technically made from unliving matter, and blood is living cells or something like that. But I'm no biologist. I make ideas from puns. Or is there another problem?

Living cells aren't unliving matter.

I don't see much of a problem with these, just don't make/call them elementals.

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Hemogoblins are usually the first summon spell learned by a Blood Mage.

I have nothing against blood magic. In fact, I think it's pretty cool. However it's not an elemental magic.

Anime-Junkie wrote:

Living cells aren't unliving matter.

I don't see much of a problem with these, just don't make/call them elementals.

Quote :

Hemogoblins are usually the first summon spell learned by a Blood Mage.

I have nothing against blood magic. In fact, I think it's pretty cool. However it's not an elemental magic.

Then they aren't elemental. They are elemental-like, but are a separate creature. Or maybe it isn't literally blood. That's not the important part about them.


True enough. I didn't call it elemental magic. I just said the first summon spell.

It is however, implied by calling them blood elementals.

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Or maybe it isn't literally blood.

I like this. Blood is more than red blood cells and this is magic.