The Dridder and the Naga

Gone

im intrigued ... to many possibilities for me to figure out what is going to happen yet i want more ... i salute you

also have a cookie

dreadis wrote:

im intrigued ... to many possibilities for me to figure out what is going to happen yet i want more ... i salute you

also have a cookie

^_^ thank you very much and YAY!!! =D cookie! ^^

This start nicely

Just maybe you could have made a bit more descriptions or differentiation on the vore bits ^^

Very interesting begining

You... PASS! Awesome story.

Karbo wrote:

This start nicely

Just maybe you could have made a bit more descriptions or differentiation on the vore bits ^^

Lol had a strange feeling someone would bring that up, I know Felarya is very vorious but I was focusing more on the love story ^^ I promise there will be good vore parts to come though!

Sean Okotami wrote:

You... PASS! Awesome story.

^_^ yay! Thank you!

gwadahunter2222 wrote:

Very interesting begining

Thank you =D

I think your only problems here are some minor grammar problems and since I'm too tired to point them out, you're going to have to read through it and find them on your own. There aren't many of them so if you only see one then don't worry about it; I'll just point them out later.

In any case, if I had to give you a rating for this story... 7/10, a very rare rating for me to give out. It's short, the descriptive detail is very little if any but I'll give you this, you introduced the characters in a very descriptive manner. Hmm... Not a whole lot of dialog and that's actually a good thing in this type of story.

Hmm... Not much else to comment on here. Good job, I won't say it was a super perfect story but it has me hooked and that is the main objective of any writer.

Spykeofkonoha wrote:

I think your only problems here are some minor grammar problems and since I'm too tired to point them out, you're going to have to read through it and find them on your own. There aren't many of them so if you only see one then don't worry about it; I'll just point them out later.

In any case, if I had to give you a rating for this story... 7/10, a very rare rating for me to give out. It's short, the descriptive detail is very little if any but I'll give you this, you introduced the characters in a very descriptive manner. Hmm... Not a whole lot of dialog and that's actually a good thing in this type of story.

Hmm... Not much else to comment on here. Good job, I won't say it was a super perfect story but it has me hooked and that is the main objective of any writer.

yay! ^^Thank you for this good feedback, I'll work more on my grammer and desciptions I hope I'll be able to improve abit more by the second chapter.