GAME: King of the Hill

I give money and M420 LMG's to the wicked witch of the west. She sends her monkeys armed with the guns. They kill the Alligators, then you. They throw poop at your dead corps.

I deploy... METAL GEAR... GEAR! And it crushes you and I take over the hill. Its MY hill now!

I order in a tactical nuclear strike which destroys everything inculding the hill, using a team of sappers crewing lead lined bulldozers we make a new hill out of ash and irradiated soil. MY HILL!

I rewrite the English language, changing the definition of hill to "a comfy armchair." I sit in said chair. MY HILL!

I come to your house and remove you from your arm chair; which I then take back to the hill. MY HILL!

I make you wear a terrible wrestling mask and fight the world's most realistic luchador, Antonio el Tigre Gordo! Not only does he Ko-BIBBLE Slap you with an authentic wooly mammoth skull, he turns you into footrest for ze comfy arm chair on ze hill. My hill... AGAIN!

I send in all 3 types of Nod MCV Mk. 7's to remove you and the wrestler from the hill. They all deploy around the hill and begin producing units to protect MY hill!

I call in an air strike; A-10Cs backed up by F-15Es and F-22A destroy your Nod base with JADAMs and SDMs. MY HILL!

I hike up the hill and fold out a beach chair with an umbrella and iced tea, pwning everyone else. MY HILL.

I take the Beach Chair out from under you, beat you to death with it and take over the hill, MY HILL

I cry while being beaten to death. When I die I become a ghost and haunt your dreams until you run off the hill. MY HILL.

I never run, so it remains MY Hill

I use.. DARK MAGIC.. to summon an army of undead to carry you away! Why carry away? So you can try to take the hill later. But for now.. MY HILL!

I call upon my friend Beware the Dark, not only does he devour the magic within the zombies, re-killing them, but he terrifies you with your most secret of fears making you sprint of ze hill emotionally scared. As Beware leaves, I dust off the fallen beach chair and practice my guitar. MY HILL AGAIN!

I drive up in a Flame Tank and burn you alive. Along with starting some fires on the hill. MY HILL!

I take about 52 metric tons of water and a rock and, using them, destroy your tank. Plug up the fire-spewing part, you know.

I then kick you.

MY HILL.

Mr. Sandman eats you for a bedtime snack and I take over the hill. MY HILL!

I send in a Cyborg Commando to take you out. MY HILL

I throw a brick at you which kills you and I take over the hill... MY Hill

I summon Ramuh to pwn your butt and fry you to a crisp. I claim this land in the name of the Pastry Kingdom!

I bring in a Cyborg Reaper. Sure, he cuts off a piece of the hill, but now it's ALL MINE!!

I snipe you from a helicopter and then parachute down on MY HILL!!

I send in a Nod Salamander to cleanse the area of you and the helicopter. MY HILL!

I call in friend Ka'lumach, he eats your lizard... even though he isn't a cannibal. My hill again.

I send a ninja in for the Ka'lumach. I then take... personal care of you.

MY HILL.