GAME: King of the Hill

I feed the crocodiles their natural prey and they find out I'm not so bad. They walk up the hill, eat you and I claim the hill. MY HILL

I feed ze crocodiles buffalo wings and they take off to a nearby river to get rid of ze spicyness. I then push you off... MY HILL!

I run you over with an F-Zero, my hill.

I launch a viral advertising campaign for a fake hill a few miles away. When you go and search for it, I take the real hill! MY HILL!

I learn russian engineering and flight tactics and rent myself a Su-32-Flanker-D. i then bomb the crap out of your hill and any others adjacent to it. about a mile away i mark a new hill and place and bomb a flag on it. MY NEW HILL!

I learn to fly an F-22, Swat your flanker-D out of the skies, and land on the airstrip I have built on the hill. MY HILL

I launch heat seaking SA missiles at you, and then take over your air strip. MY HILL

I overrun your precious air strip with my minions in the dead of night. They tear you to pieces and feast on your bone marrow before I put them to work constructing my own dark tower of Evil atop the hill. MY HILL!

I launch a tactical ICBM at the hill which contains a calculator what divides by zero. Everyone on the hill is teleported into another dimension, and I am able to claim the hill. MY HILL!

i set up a conference building on your hill. It composes a meeting hall so we can discuss who's hill it really is (we each have missile launch buttons and about 200 men to decide. That's if there is no negotiation lol.)

I quietly take over the hill while you're discussing it amongst yourselves. MY Hill.

I commit war! i send a company of special infantry to apprehend you. they successfully managed to do so. all resources you had including the hill now belong to me for collateral. MY HILL!

I place copious amounts of laxative in the hill's water supply. While your soldiers are incapacitated, I claim the hill! MY HILL!

I clone the hill and fool you into walking over to the wrong one. MY HILL

Hank Hill, Dale Gribble, Boomhower, and Bill walk onto the hill. Their ultimate Redneckness overpowers everyone, causing them to leave. They each open up a beer.
Hank: Yup.
Dale: Yup.
Bill: Yup.
Boomhower: Mmhmm.

The four begin to drink.

I sabotage the propane tanks, causing the hill to burn down! Then, I reclaim the ruins. My hill!

In Soviet Russia. hill claims YOU. (guess its my hill)

I treck to soviet russia and hire some S.T.A.L.K.E.Rs to take the hill.
My hill.

I siege the hill with trebuchets, with giant tortoises as ammo. MY HILL!

I put geographical terraform rockets beneath the hill and send it in orbit, making it a artificial satellite. MY HILL!

I send a bear in a space helmet up to ze satellite and presses a BIGREDBUTTON, which sends ze hill back to Earth. While free-falling, ze bear gives you a bear hug. MY HILL!

I run you over in a motorcycle and then run away. When the ambulance comes, I return without it- and put my flag on it. MY HILL!

I walk up the hill and push you down. While you're rolling down, I kick over your flag and replace it with an emergency beacon that will call forth an unstoppable armada that will unleash hell on the hill and the surrounding area if it is disturbed or I die. MY HILL!

I use one mothership and a handful of archons to create the archon toilet to destroy your armada. MY HILL.

I send a bunch of crazy fan girls to assault the armada. MY HILL.