Puzzle Story

Greetings again. Rather than a quickie, I guess this time we'll have to call this one a slowie, or maybe a set of quickies. It's not quite that divided, and it can be read in a sitting... looks like it'll be one long sitting though. So get your tea or fruit juice and cookies before reading.

Lucilya belongs to Frenchsnack. Herb belongs to me. Credits to Sean and Frog for helping me come up with Herb's name. Everything else belongs to Karbo.

Please keep in mind that while I'm aware this couldn't ever possibly be original, I'm sure there's at least a dozen stories with the same theme (including Planescape: Torment pre-definitive incarnation, and Radical Dreamers in a way... well, they're games, actually), it's the only one I've written- and I haven't read any published stories with that theme. Though I'd like to think that "A hundred years of solitude" helped in a way- and I'd be lying if I said "The Fool's Errand" by Cliff Johnson wasn't an inspiration. But "The Fool's Errand" was a game too.

I can recommend Radical Dreamers if you liked this story. It's not quite the same- but each of its seven endings can provide you with at least two hours' worth of entertainment. Note, however, that it's more humorous than either Chrono Trigger or Chrono Cross- and infinitely more humorous than Getsuyoubi by Stabs. Also, more inspiring...

SPECIAL NOTE: Like that raider and fairy one, this one isn't meant to be uplifting. This is meant to be pure despair and bemusement- even more than last time. If such is not your fare, you know what to do. I won't make any jokes this time around, and I'll try to keep the funny down to a minimum.
Oh, Happy New Year, everyone. There's a fun note at the end- but please don't read it until you've suffered through the rest.




Getsuyoubi, starring Lucilya and Herb
By Stabs


As he pushed himself off the grass, he gasped in surprise- grass? His mouth tasted like dirt- how long had he been on the ground? What had just happened!?

Standing up, he rubbed the back of one hand at the stubble on his cheek, grimacing, and the taste of dirt still in his lips. All around him... green, brown, and atop him, blue... the adrenaline wasn't helping, what the hell was this place!? He tried in vain to focus his eyes- then he dropped to his knees, his hands fumbling in the tall grass, desperately crawling in circles.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped. "I never took them off..."

His poor, useless eyes caught a glimmer. Still gasping, he advanced towards it... and picked up the object, despairing as he felt its regular shape.

"No, no, no!" he grunted. It wasn't the right object: it was white. He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself. They couldn't be far away. Unless someone had taken them, they couldn't be far away.

The sun on his back, even through his shirt, and his vest, was scalding. There was a cool breeze, but it wouldn't go past his vest. He let out a grumble, and took it off, letting the breeze chill his sweaty back. Then he wondered where he would put the vest while he was looking.

Just then he saw something on the ground, some trampled grass... maybe? Crawling towards his objective, he picked something up, feeling its proper shape, and swiftly put it over his ears, in front of his eyes. Then he blinked a little, trying to calm down. At the very least, now he could see.

This place had grass all the way to his knees, just like some forests he'd been to, and... Blue highlights? Blue highlights in the grass? Probably some kind of disease, he guessed... he didn't know of any blue grass. It was kind of strange that the grass looked so healthy, though. The trees around him were huge... He started thinking. He knew of trees that large... but there wasn't any that big within a hundred, maybe a thousand miles of the campus. This place wasn't... he tried to recall something.

Last thing he remembered was that laser experiment. They were using that unknown sample, a dielectric of inconclusive composition... he'd warned them it wouldn't produce any results. Looks like he was wrong. It wasn't homogeneous- teal blue, but with red highlights. It wouldn't produce a laser beam at all; they'd need a synthetic version first. Looks like he'd been right, and wrong- whatever it had produced upon reaching population inversion, it hadn't been a laser beam. But it was something- or else he wouldn't be here right now...

No, that was stupid. Nothing could produce that effect- he couldn't have been teleported. Someone must've played a prank on him. He checked his watch... damn, it was a good prank, according to his watch; it'd only been fifteen minutes since the experiment. And raising his gaze to the sky, it did look like 11:34 AM. Had he slept for an entire day? Maybe he had amnesia? Missing time? There had to be an explanation. Thankfully, checking on his pants, he had a mobile phone.

He turned it on, unblocked the system, and quickly dia... No signal!? No way! It was a satellite model, worldwide coverage! He'd paid quite dearly for it, too!

Raising his gaze, he wondered if these thick canopies were dampening the signal that the cell phone could catch with that little battery, what with all their angles and edges, electromagnetic signals always diffracted slightly around edges, worse for thinner edges, like leaves... that must have been it, it was either that or he was completely screwed for reasons beyond his comprehension. He just needed a wide open space, or a high spot to call from. That was it. He shook his head a little, trying to look through that colossal forest.

Thinking he saw something, he ran through the forest in the direction with the most light. That had to be an open space. He ran, then jogged, then walked, gasping for air. He was no runner, he was a professor...

"Oh boy..." he mumbled, looking over the clearing, hearing giggles and laughter.

The clearing was covered with flowers, flowers he wasn't really interested in right now. In its center, there was a large, large pond... he thought he saw some stuff moving in the distance. Judging from the laughter, they were people. But at this distance, with those glasses, they were all a little dazzling for some reason. He couldn't tell exactly what they were. All he could tell was that they were giggling.

Taking his cell phone again, he walked towards the pond, mumbling out a shy "Hey", and checking the signal once more.

Still no signal.

"Ah, damn." he grumbled. Well, if there were people here, that was probably a concern out of his mind. He ducked towards the water, sighing, and thinking of what to say next. But first, he wanted to wipe the muddy taste from his lips. He touched the water...

"Ooooh, see? He touched the water!" he thought he heard someone say... a feminine voice? Surprised, he turned and slipped in the mud closest to the pond; his back hitting the mud with a gasp- was there that much mud here before?

"What the...?" he managed to gasp, before grimacing with his mouth closed. He sat up, pushing his glasses towards the bridge of his nose. Then he looked out... perspective seemed to have played a trick on him, the far end of the pond was so far away now! And behind him, the mud extended into a forest of blue, bamboo-like stalks, ending in puffs too high up to discern with his reading glasses. He squinted, there was too much light. "Hello? Err, excuse me, I seem to have lost my way..." he cried, to no one in particular. The voices all around were still giggling- and for some reason, he didn't feel comforted by their merriness anymore.

"Alright, let me help you find your way." someone said, from high above him. Sounded like a woman.

"Thanks, uh... who said that?" he asked, feeling a little bemused from the whole experience.

"Oh, don't thank me!" she giggled. "I'm just doing what anyone else would. I'm glad you let me!"

"That's very kiACK!" he began, until something wrapped itself around his chest and knocked the air out of him. He cried at the top of his lungs when he was suddenly lifted... all he managed to see with his glasses was something red on tan, the whoosh of the wind all that rang on his ears. Then he saw some darkness. And then there was nothing to see but darkness, somewhere moist, with a scent he was too nervous to place. Something rough smacked and rubbed itself on him from all directions, covering him with something liquid, but that wasn't nearly as runny as water. He coughed as some of it got into his nose, spat whatever he could, but there was just too much of it.

By the time he managed to get his bearings, he was being manhandled down a tunnel, and then he hit ground way too soft to be real. Everything was still in darkness. He didn't know what had hit him.

He sure wished he did, though, it couldn't be worse than what he was imagining...


====


He gasped and then spat the grass out, surprised. Pushing himself off the ground, he saw only blue and his two hands below him. Taking a good look around, he only saw blue- and then he heard a voice.

"You're here!" a woman's voice giggled, overjoyed. "I KNEW you'd be here, I've been waiting all morning!"

A little relieved from having a fellow in this strangeness, he turned around with a half-smile. He could barely make out a tan, blurry silhouette.

"Say, who are you? And where am I?"

"You don't remember?" she asked, surprised.

"Should I? No offense meant..."

"It's okay. It's no problem." she said, sounding resigned, but still willing to make the best of the situation.

"Well, thank you for not taking it personal. I tend to forget lots of things..." he sighed.

"Like this?" she asked. All of a sudden, he found himself losing his balance- even though he was already lying on his back, with his arms.

"Damn! Like what, exactly?" he asked, trying to stand up, finding the ground a lot shakier now. She grabbed his waist, and lifted him... into the air.

"Whoa, what's this!?" Frank asked, seeing that he was now in front of a round, tan silhouette, framed in blue, with a darker spot that was getting bigger and bigger... right in front of him. His mind's eye quickly compared that to a mouth- and the traces of pinkish red and white weren't helping... neither was the warm scent, like... now that he thought about it, it was a woman's breath...

"You'll be here tomorrow too, won't you?" she asked, innocently.

"What are you talking about!?" he replied, completely lost. "What's... what's going on!?"

"Ah, never mind." she shrugged -he felt it- and then "Ahhh" placed him delicately on her tongue.

First thing he did was clinging on for his life- that thing was god knows how high in the air. As it went back inside her mouth, he wondered if maybe he'd been drugged and was in a trip right now. Last thing he remembered was Dr. Greek's experiment, trying to determine the composition of that crystalline sample, a dielectric... it wasn't homogeneous, it was teal blue, with red veins.

Teal blue with red veins-

Teal blue with red veins.

Teal blue, with red veins.

Teal blue, with red veins...

He sure hoped this was all a bad dream where he was choking on drool, rubbed between something rough and something soft, sliding down something gummy... and then... left in the darkness to wait until he woke up...


======


For some reason, the feeling of grass was almost revolting; he spat. He knew he wasn't at university... now he just wanted to know where he was, because being in the middle of nowhere was making him panic. As he raised his gaze off the ground and saw blue, he realized he needed his glasses. Pushing himself off the ground, he searched in the waist-high grass.

His fingers felt around in the base of the grass, as he muttered curses under his breath. This place where he was... where was it? Why was the grass blue? It didn't smell like paint... but it didn't look natural, either. Maybe it was... whatever. He didn't have the time for this. He needed his glasses.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

Suddenly, his hands felt air. There, just behind some well-trampled grass, he found something black; the first thing he did was picking it up. Luckily it was his glasses. He slid them on his nose, looking around for a moment.

The size of those trees was too large to be believed- and their canopies were extremely thick. From the pictures he'd seen, sequoias sure as spit didn't look like that, and this wasn't a deciduous forest. This was a jungle, pure and simple. He was about to look at his watch, when he suddenly heard something.

A tortured scream- coming from a direction where the light was strongest. Though for an instant he wanted to go that way, then he heard gunfire, and his common sense sprung into action- he took his satellite phone, a look of utter terror crossing his face as soon as he saw that there was no signal. He decided to avoid that place, and instead ran the other way around... sorry as he felt for whoever had screamed there was nothing he could do about it! All he could do now was hope the gunner didn't find him too...

In absolute panic, he kept running through the jungle, hoping to avoid the gunner- and hoping to survive the sprint, there were thorns everywhere, and he lost count of the times he tripped or hit his head. To say that this was awful was the mother of all understatements. He just wanted to be somewhere away from this place, as far away as possible, somewhere he could take a nap and never wake up, being safe and protected...

...that's when he tripped over something. A bloodied... wallet?

He scrambled backwards while sitting down, until something caught his attention. It looked a lot like his wallet. What the hell!?

Beating his initial panic, curiosity overtook him and he picked up the wallet, opening it. There was a driver's license, belonging to Frank V. Herb.

That was HIS license... he took his own wallet, and pulled out his license.

There was no mistake, both were the same. What the fuck was going on!? He checked the money. There were thirty-five dollars- that was 5 dollars richer than he was. And one of the bills had something written on it.

-Check your wallet.-

Frank checked his wallet. Pulling out those dollars, he realized something...
DK 54622311 H

That was the same code, circled on that bill. And there was a duplicate in that wallet, too. There were three of them! Two in a bloodied wallet...

Frank got up, trying to make heads or tails of this. He started scratching the back of his head, and then he realized he smelled something. He covered his nose, and looked behind a bush.

"Oh SHIT!"

Behind that bush, there was a corpse that had already been picked clean to the bones, the jungle vermin finishing the job. It smelled like death- and there were torn pieces of blood-soaked cloth everywhere. But what caught Frank's eyes was a glint...

He followed that glint, covering his nose with his hand, and picked the blood-soaked object up. A watch- just like the one he had on his wrist.

THURSDAY 12:16 PM

He gulped. Was that body really... him? This was too much to take in. He checked the wallet again- he'd missed one thing.

A business card. Despite the bloodstains, there was something legible...

-If I'm reading this, I've been here before.-
-At least twice.-
-I wonder what happened to me.-
-I'll be using the vest to mark the spots where I die.-

Frank shook his head. That was obviously him. How dramatic... he must've felt like a hero while doing that. The sad part is that he was right: he had been here before, and died. Ripped apart by wild animals, what a horrible way to die. Well, he was here now.

He stood away from his body. It smelled like death and decay, it made him retch, but that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was realizing what that meant... it meant he now was... not only in danger, but probably locked in a cycle of death and reappearance. He not only wondered what would kill him, but also what happened if he survived. What happened if more of him survived? Would he be prepared to live with the fact he was the least unique person in the world, that there'd be two, or more of him?

A million horrible ideas floated through his mind for an instant. In the end, he reassured himself that -bleak as this sounded- he had to first see IF he could make it out of this situation alive. Then he could start thinking about what he would do WHEN he got out of this alive. For all he knew, he'd already made it back to civilization.

The thought was a little comforting. Knowing that he wouldn't send help back was kind of liberating. Knowing he had nothing to add to the card kind of made it frustrating, though...

Well, he didn't have much to add to the card at the time. Maybe later...

Taking a pen, he jot something down on another card.

-Anything I find out, anything at all will be of use.-
-There have been several instances of me already, at least two.-
-I've found one of their, my, our corpses.-
-Looks like I was ripped apart by feral wolves.-
-I heard gunshots and a scream from the brightest direction, from where I woke up.-
-That can't be the right way.-

He took a few deep breaths. There was something more.

-Frank, don't despair.-
-For all we know, one of us already made it.-

Yes, that was worth knowing. Just reading that made him feel a lot more courageous. And speaking of courage...

-Don't be afraid to do what you have to.-
-I won't let it end like this. And I know you won't either.-

Herb gasped for a while, clenching his eyes. A few tears streamed down as he stored the card, a renewed determination flourishing in his eyes. Whatever happened happened. Frank Herb wouldn't give up. If it took a thousand tries, he'd get out of this! And if there was a million Frank Herbs, then a million Frank Herbs would work together to get out of this.

He put the note to self back in the wallet, and wrapped it in the timepiece. He had been quite the moron to carry those things with himself- what if he lost them? He put them in clear view, jammed in a bush, right beside the skeleton.

"Here lies Frank V. Herb." Frank mumbled. Praying right now felt like a mockery, so he decided to go on. He saw another tiny clearing, reaching it he'd have an easy time walking for a while. Ten free meters seemed pretty inviting. As long as he kept moving, it was likely he'd find something.

This clearing was covered in giant lily pads. Strange... lily pads on hard dirt? Maybe they were floating on thin mud? They looked kind of firm, though. He stuck his foot out just to test it. It yielded... he didn't know how far it'd yield, it was still pretty rigid.

Then all of a sudden, the lily pad clamped on his foot like a bear trap and started pulling him down. He clung as hard as he could to a branch, and kept his leg stiff, pulling back with all his might. Damn, that was a very strong lily pad! And it really wanted him...

He started realizing that maybe not all of his deaths had left remains. As he did, his fingers slipped a little from the branch- but he refused to give up! He grabbed it as hard as he could, then used one hand to cling to it while he swung another to cling even harder, pulling himself towards the branch despite the lily pad. He was going to win this round!

No use. The branch snapped, and the lily pad pulled him into a muddy hollow in the ground, where it opened back and then clamped back on him, like he were an insect.

Carnivorous plant, maybe? He didn't have much time to think about it. He struggled as hard as he could, while the small enveloped he was inside filled slowly with noxious fluid...


======


Pushing himself off the grass, spitting, he grimaced in panic. He didn't have his glasses on; the taste of grass was only worse because of its blue tone. What was this place!? What was he doing here? His gaze rose, turning towards the brown, and the green- and almost imperceptible traces of dark green... he couldn't see a thing like this. He needed his glasses.

Searching frantically on the ground, despite that waist-tall grass, he tried to locate something special. He needed it to see, and the panic was making him short of breath.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

Eventually, he located his glasses. Putting them on, he looked up at the sky. It was blocked by a thick, multitudinous canopy, coming from trees that were just too large to be real. At least they were too large to be anywhere near university. He checked his wrist watch- it was 11:37 AM, Monday. It hadn't been that long since...

Dr. Greek's experiment. That bastard had gotten distracted- he'd commented something about his brother back in Lithuania. He didn't really care what it was, that shifty bastard and his moustache should've been on their guard while they tried a population inversion on that sample to determine its composition. And instead- no, it was stupid to think that the crystal did this. That crystal wasn't homogeneous- it couldn't create a laser. This had been something else- maybe he'd been hit with a special gas while someone stole the crystal?

That made more sense. It was pretty good-looking, teal-blue with red veins. Security at university had always been really lax, anyone could get in. But if you spoke up against that you were a fascist pig, because it was a house of knowledge and it belonged to everyone. It was every idiot, stupid, criminal hooligan's right to stride in with a bat, a six-pack, and a can of spray, break the urinals, paint dicks and peace signs on the walls, throw eggs and shit in the classrooms and maybe have sex too if they found a place to their liking. Couldn't they restrict access to only people with business in there!? Hell, even restricting access to only people who had the balls to walk up to a guardsman and show their faces would have been more than enough.

Well, that wouldn't help either way. Criminals had as a main prerequisite being willing to break the law, and this had been the work of... what the hell this line of thought was. He wasn't a criminal forensics expert.

Taking his satellite phone, he dialed. He had his satellite phone, so it wasn't just any criminal looking for valuables, and he hadn't been just given an LSD pill to keep him out of commiss...

...no signal. The canopy, it must have produced enough diffraction to jam a civilian model. He was sure the army's equipment never did this to its owners. Groaning, he looked around, trying to find a little light somewhere. That'd mean a clearing; hopefully it'd be raised too. If that thing couldn't work there either, he could always try and sue the industry as soon as he got back.

He found light coming freely in from a certain direction. A clearing, which was all he needed. He went towards the clearing, stopping for a moment to look at a vest. It was a little too dirty... he preferred not to touch it.

The path to the clearing sure was obstructed- he lost count of the number of thorns, fallen logs, and such that were on his way. The canopy seemed to become even thicker out there, making it way too dark. He wondered where this would lead him.

Something creaked behind him

"Gotcha!" a playful voice chirped. He let out a cry, and turned around in time to see a hand wrap around him. The next thing he could see was a massive, green and brown smile, and then the mouth behind that smile.

Had he just been eaten by a tree?

The next thing he knew was that he was being soaked on something that tickled on the skin. It was making him shiver uncontrollably, twitch, almost spasming. If his tongue wasn't in its proper place, he'd have sworn he was convulsing. And from the hums around him, he could've sworn the tree was getting a heady rush out of this too. His heart rate was climbing, he couldn't see, he couldn't hear anything past that hum, he could barely even speak, he couldn't even manage the coordination to feel anything. His glasses fell off his face, and then he heard a glassy crack.

"GAAAH!"

Several glassy cracks later he fell down a tunnel, covering as best as he could his face with his nearly irresponsive arms. Then he landed somewhere wet- somewhere with the bones of another man- twitching too hard himself to be able to tell anything else. He tried to stand up, but all he managed to do was flail on the bottom- and even as he tried to find a wall to prop himself up against, he only managed to slap it.

On the outside, the dryad was rubbing her belly. That new, special saliva was doing wonders.

"Mmm, it was like a week since I've had anything this tasty..."

-Six days exactly. - Another dryad corrected her.

"Aw, stop hairsplitting and let me enjoy this..."

Last he knew he felt were the slivers of glass on his belly. At the rate he was thrashing they were going to go through his vest anytime now...


=====


He grimaced, pushing himself up and spitting, bemused and astray. Grass. He spent all the time he could bemoaning the fact that he wasn't supposed to be there... then he wondered why the grass was blue. Maybe it wasn't grass. Looking up, he wondered why the sky was green- what was that dark green all around? Why was there so little light coming from the floor? Was this place a factory or something?

He started fumbling on the ground, trying to find his glasses. There wasn't a single thing he could do until he found them. That tall grass wasn't making it any easier... he wondered where this was, as he muttered under his breath.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

"Were you looking for this?" he heard a young woman's voice ask behind him.

"Huh?" he mumbled, turning his head around. He saw a tan figure... he couldn't see much more. "Excuse me...?" he asked again, trying to stand up.

"Are those your glasses?" she asked, with a friendly tone. He blinked and advanced with sluggish steps. She grabbed his hand, and put his glasses on it. He gasped for a moment.

"Ah... I think they are." he said, putting them on. He blinked a little to clear his eyes, and then sighed in relief as everything came into focus.

"Thanks a lot..."

In front of him, there was a young woman. She had a friendly smile on her tan features, huge ¿purple? Eyes and short ¿blue? Hair. Not to say he didn't see many naked women, but this one was standing in the nude right in front of...

...right in front of a massive butterfly or wasp? No, she had wings; they were so transparent, so faint he would've easily missed them. And she had antennae too.

"You're welcome!" she beamed. "Umm..."

"Yes?" he asked, bemused. Until he had a better idea, he could ignore the fact she was naked.

"Are you Frank Herb?"

"Have we met? I think I'd remember someone like you, err..."

"Lucilya."

"Ah." he said. "Sounds like one of my students... well, nice to meet you, Lucilya..."

"Can you stay still for a moment?" she asked. "Look at me."

"Ah... sure." Frank replied. "Anything."

She smiled. Then she took something. A bloody plastic-wrapped card- it looked like a...

"What's that?" he asked. Lucilya just answered with a pout.

"I need to get a better look..." she said, looking at him. For a moment, perspective seemed to play a trick on him; he felt dizzy, as if he'd fallen really fast and stopped just as much. Then he looked down- seeing trampled grass everywhere.

But each of those blades of grass was blue and as tall as a building...

"Lucilya, are you...?" he asked, when a tan hand suddenly picked him up. He found himself raised to chest level with a massive woman- Lucilya again? Only now... he grimaced, the obvious answer didn't fit with his view of the world.

"Have I shrunk?"

"Yes." she chirped merrily, putting him right over the plastic-wrapped card. "Look at me, like in the picture."

"Picture? What picture?" he asked, turning around to see the picture. What he saw was...

...a life-sized picture of him. The same picture of him that was in his driver's license- his short blonde hair in strands, his smooth face with a little stubble, only his thick glasses distorting the otherwise handsome visage. Only this picture's head was as large as his own.

"Look at me!" Lucilya chirped. He looked back at her. "Close your mouth, like in the picture!"

He gulped. She once more beamed.

"Yeah! It's your picture." she chirped. "Come to think of it, I've seen you around!"

"Really? I mean... wait, what?" Frank gasped.

"I mean this is the third time I eat you! Sorry, it's kind of hard to recognize you."

"This is the third time you what?" he grimaced.

"Eat you, silly."

Frank took a deep breath.

"You mean you're going to eat me... again?"

"Yes!" she beamed. "You're delicious."

"What do you mean by again?"

Lucilya suddenly clammed up.

"I found you here a couple times, so I ate you. Then I found this..." she said, pointing at the card.

"License."

"That. I thought I recognized that face from somewhere. Well, the mystery is solved. It was you." she was still smiling.

"I don't understand... how can I be here if you ate me?" he asked, raising his voice. She shrugged a little.

"I don't know. Will you be here tomorrow again so that I can eat you?" her tone was still merry.

"Lucilya, I still don't know what the hell you are talking about! Put me down, damn it, and change me back, then we'll talk!"

"No." she grinned. Then she brought him up to her mouth.

As things started warming up and the acceleration brought a feeling to the pit of his stomach, he tried to scream, but he didn't have any air; he needed to inhale. By the time he finally started screaming, he was inside her mouth, thrashing, trying to keep the teeth away, paralyzed on account of whether it was a good idea to try to get back out to the lips, all he could do was try to shove off her teeth in the darkness, while something trampled him and shoved him into every single corner of her mouth. He heard a couple hums over his own screams, but they managed to do nothing to increase his panic. He was already at his limits...

By the time she finally swallowed, he'd given up and just laid there limp and exhausted, a pained grimace in his face. He slid down her throat, and by the time he arrived, he already knew what was waiting...


======


Spitting grass, he wondered nervously what exactly had happened. He couldn't recall what had happened- only that it had been too strange to put in words. He recalled the dielectric sample, its inconclusive analysis, their attempt at using the sample for a laser... he'd bet that smug Dr. Greek five bucks it wouldn't do anything. Dr. Greek had been down that day, he'd been distracted, he'd told him something about his brother in Lithuania, he hadn't been paying attention to the dials... and then... nothing he could put in words, it had all happened so fast. Now, how long had it been?

Checking his wrist watch, he realized he didn't have his glasses. He fumbled around the tall grass, mumbling to himself as he noticed its blue color. It didn't make sense, maybe it was a fungal infection, but he didn't have time for that. He was a physicist, not a botanist. And he needed his glasses. If he was here now, so had to be his glasses- unless someone had taken them from him.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

He looked around, trying to find a sign, any sign of his glasses. There was nothing. Nothing at all. He stood up, to take a better look around. The heel of his shoe hit something- it was light, and made the right sound. He ducked and grabbed his glasses, sliding them over his ears.

"Hmm..."

Looking up, he saw the sun high in the sky. Looking down at his watch, he saw it was 11:33 AM, 56, 57, 58, 59. And then it was 11:34 AM. Monday. Seemed like it hadn't been half an hour- which didn't explain how comes it he was now within a forest the size of which wasn't available in a hundred, maybe two hundred, miles from university. Well, there was no time for things like that now. He took his satellite phone, realizing only a moment later that there was no signal.

Was it blocked, or was it jammed? He hoped it was blocked by the canopy- he didn't have how to run all the proper tests here, but he did remember that electromagnetic waves diffracted around the edge of any matter. That was quite the thick canopy up there. Looking around, he saw some light in the distance- probably a clearing. There would be a better signal there.

He walked impatiently towards what he hoped was a clearing. It couldn't be farther than half a mile away; he was already wondering what he would do if he failed to reach it. He took off his vest halfway through- it was getting too hot.

Then all of a sudden, he heard a creak behind him. He turned around to look... and then let out a shrill yelp as someone hugged him from behind.

"What the...?" he barked, trying to turn around... he couldn't. Whoever this was- no, not a person, those weren't arms, something had grabbed him! He let out a cry, looking down, seeing the green and brown... fingers!? Green and brown fingers!?

"Gotcha!" something chuckled, from right above him.

"What...!? Who is it!?" he cried, raising his gaze. It was close enough, and still enough- but even then, over his adrenaline, it took him a moment to realize what he was looking at.

Two massive eyes, on an equally massive face, crowned with green... it wasn't hair, it was vine and leaves! And her mouth was drooling. Probably not good... not good, not good at all...

"Oh, you must be new. Too bad for you- someone ran past by me yesterday and I couldn't catch them. But today, I'm not going hungry!" she grinned.

"Wait... you're going to eat me!?" he asked, horrified.

"Yup. Don't worry- you won't feel a thing, I promise." she giggled. "It'll be painless."

"But... wait! I mean, where am I, and..." suddenly he realized he had way too many questions. She had realized it too.

"You've got too many questions... just relax, okay? It won't help."

"But please..."

Her face relaxed for a moment. Then she looked away.

"No. What for?" she shrugged, raising him to her mouth. Then she placed him in... he cried at the top of his lungs, once more, his hands suddenly dropping his vest; his screaming stopped the moment he tasted her saliva. His mouth went numb, his throat went numb, and he started having trouble breathing. And the more he struggled, the more soaked he got, the number his body turned, until he could barely tell if he was moving or not. Her tongue ran over him, rough and oddly imperceptible. All he could feel now was the pull of gravity changing direction slightly... he couldn't feel an inch of his body; he couldn't feel anything at all. He couldn't scream; even though he wanted to, all that he managed was a moaning hum, a sound he thought only a mute's throat could produce.

And now he was mute.

He felt pressed somehow as he fell irregularly down something. Then he felt a sudden stop, a landing. It was all so imperceptible... he wanted to breathe harder, he was in panic, but he couldn't. His heart pumping hard, his breath unable to keep up, he only managed to faint...


======


He grimaced, feeling the taste of grass in his mouth. Raising his gaze, he spat a little to clear his tongue of the taste. Then he picked himself up, really surprised- where was this place? All he could see was something blue, covering the ground like grass. He struggled a moment to regain his balance, then he looked around.

Silly him. Looking around without his glasses. Once more, he crouched a little, running his hands through the grasses nearest to him, trying to feel for them. He was feeling so nervous right now... first an experiment he couldn't remember right, and now this!? Merlin Greek would have a complaint filed, that was for sure! But first, glasses!

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

He kept feeling around for his glasses- then he suddenly felt something familiar. Well, kind of familiar, because he recoiled instantly.

"I'm sorry!" he blurted, withdrawing a little, and then standing up. "Sorry, it was an accident. Please forgive me..."

For a moment he wondered if he was blushing. Then he tried to focus his eyes, even without the glasses- the blurry shape in front of him could've been a woman.

"No problem." she chirped. Her voice was almost musical... he saw her tan skin, and what looked like short blue hair. For a moment, he thought

"I can't see very well without my glasses..." he commented.”Guess they're not here."

"Glasses?" she asked, curious.

"Yeah... I wear glasses." then he noticed he wasn't getting any hints of any clothing. Matter of fact, he thought those two spots might've very well been her nipples. "Never mind... I'm Frank. Professor Frank Victor Herb, nice to meet you..."

"I'm Lucilya." she said. "Pleased to eat you, Profe Frank Vic." she said, sounding a little apologetic near the end. She tilted her head a little, and he giggled a little at her slip of her tongue.

"Lucilya, eh? Reminds me of one of my students... just call me Frank. Or Herb. Or Vic, if you want..." he chuckled, trying to keep his eyes focused on her face.

"Okay." she answered, sounding a little uninterested.

"Yeah..." he grinned.”You wouldn't happen to know where I can find a public phone, would you."

She shrugged.

"Ah, it's okay. Can you use a cell phone?"

She shrugged too.

"Yeah, well..." he laughed.”You know, please don't get offended, but I just have to ask this one, because it's been really bugging me for a while." he asked, on the verge of falling apart into nervous laughing.

"Hm?"

"Are you naked?"

"Yes!" she replied, energetically.

"Ah, that explains it." he chuckled. "Look, are there any roads or cities close by? ...?" he asked, waiting on her for a while.

"None that I know of."

"Oh, well, sorry about that. I'll be frank, Lucilya... is there anything you can do to help me find my home?" he asked, hoping to come off as charming with the pun.

Seemed like it was lost on her. She just tilted her head again.

"No, but I can think of a place where you can go."

"Well..." he sighed, making a pause.”It's better than nothing, at least. Thanks, Lucilya."

"Sure." she replied. A moment later he found himself losing his balance.

"Oh boy!" he cried. "I'm such a klutz... help me up, will you?"

"Sure!" she chirped. Only a moment later, he caught a glimpse of that tan- but it was too much tan? She was either too close or...

He felt her fingers delicately wrap around him, much to his silent chagrin, and then lift him all the way up to... what was this? Looked like her face, magnified large enough that he could've made the details out without his glasses, had he had the time. He squinted, bringing his face closer, grimacing... then he heard her giggling again.

"What... just happened?" he asked. "Where am I?"

All he had for an answer was the smell of her breath, and then he passed over her lips. It only took him a few seconds to figure something out... she was tasting him, and then there was acceleration. Too much acceleration. Where was she going?! What had she done!? How had she done it!? Why wasn't she chewing him, maybe there was a chance she...

By the time he thought that, he was awkwardly tossed down and forward her throat. There he found himself alone half-submerged in a place smelling of low-concentration hydrochloryc and, by the time he felt some dulled-out bones, he realized the other scent was that of high-concentration carbon dioxide. There was no breathable air here.

Mixed blessing...


======


Grass? What the hell? This wasn't university! No, it was blue! He spat, panicking, raising his gaze towards the green canopy above- what size were those trees!? He couldn't see anything like this, he needed his glasses!

Fumbling around in the ground, he caught something that looked like a card. And something that felt like a dollar. They were under a large... rigid thing. He brought them closer to his face, and then his face contorted in powerlessness. He couldn't read SHIT without his glasses! But now he was curious. He put the objects in his pocket, and then kept feeling.

"I never fucking took them off, where the hell are they supposed to be!?"

It didn't take long for him to find his glasses. He put his glasses on- and then looked up.

Those trees were huge beyond measure. He thought back to the map of the general zone around the city... he couldn't think of any forests with trees this large, hell, even in the whole state there probably weren't trees that big! How far away was he? Checking his wrist watch, it was 11:35 AM, Monday.

No time for those things. He pulled out his satellite phone- feeling a couple things he'd found in the ground with it. No, three. Pulling out his phone, he took one of the objects out of curiosity as he started dialing...

...no signal?

He let out a groan, and then his eyes casually looked over the object. It looked like a business card.

Matter of fact it looked like his own business card...

ORD
OPTIC RESEARCH DEPARTMENT

PROF. FRANK V. HERB
frank.herb@phy.baun.edu

PHYSICS DEPARTMENT - BALTIMORE UNIVERSITY

He turned the card around just out of reflex.

-If I'm reading this, I've been here before.-
-At least twice.-
-I wonder what happened to me?-
-I'll be using the vest to mark the spots where I die.-

He pocketed back his phone and took the other two objects. A five dollar bill and a... diamond? He looked the dollar over carefully.
-Check your wallet- was unmistakably written in his own handwriting, and near it, a circle around the series code.
DK 54622311 H

He shook his head, taking his own wallet. Poring over his stuff, he found his money, and pulled out a five dollar bill.
DK 54622311 H

"What the fuck!?" he grimaced. This might've been a fake dollar, but it was a fake of a specific bill- and damn if it wasn't a well-faked dollar! Holding them to the scarce light that came from the canopy, using all the standard procedures he knew to identify a real bill, he found both bills equally genuine, and just as much as the rest of his money.

Impossible...

Stunned, he looked up at the canopy. Diffraction was probably blocking the signal- he needed a clearing. Looking into the distance around him, he spotted some light- that probably was a clearing.

But as he approached it, he found a vest. A vest very much like his own. He took it out of reflex... and examined it a little. It was his size, and it was exactly the same vest he was wearing right now, up to the mustard stain on the front. Not even he had realized there was a mustard stain on his clothes, honestly, until he saw the matching stains on both vests. And they both had matching pens in their pockets...

This was all still a little hard to digest. But it was unmistakably his handwriting. And it was unmistakably his vest, and his dollar, and his business card. He shook his head, and left the vest there. That was the wrong way. He turned the other way around, and started walking into the thick jungle.

He had known it'd be thick, but he had no idea it'd be this thick, this wet, this thorny, this muddy on the ground and this full of obstacles. For a moment he wondered if maybe he wouldn't have done better staying where he'd started out, there was no way he'd get anywhere on this terrain, he hadn't hiked in a lifetime- literally. Then he found a patch of flat green. He approached, hoping it'd be an easy walk on that spot...

...and he got interrupted as he saw his vest.

Once more, it was his own vest. It looked like it'd been out in the open for a day- but there was no mistake it was his vest, up to the same stain, too. He'd been there too... probably he was being replicated?

He could only blame, come to think of it, Dr. Greek's experiment for that. Apparently, that sample hadn't produced a coherent beam of light upon attaining population inversion. It had... done something else, something unknown to modern science. However, tossing him and several duplicates in an alien jungle? That sounded too convenient... he didn't think it was possible to time-travel, but the possibility couldn't be ruled out. After all, the other possibility was that this place existed somewhere in the present- and he was sure he'd seen enough pictures of sequoias to know more or less where they lived. And this, it was more likely to have a snowball in hell than to think this was the natural habitat of the redwood tree. IF those trees looked anything like redwoods... they weren't even coniferous, and yet they were nearly a block tall! And this place was too moist for sequoias.

He avoided the flat ground. Come to think of it, it was too convenient. Taking a roundabout, he kept walking- the worst thing he could do now was to stop beneath that canopy. It wouldn't get him anywhere. He needed signal, or he needed a native, he needed something to get him on track. He needed a road, something, anything!

He stopped, hearing a low howl. It was followed by some rustling- he quickly turned around. There were something like big dogs there; only with long snouts and fierce eyes... he sure hoped those yellow eyes weren't what he thought they were, because if they were, he was-

Quickly, he scrambled towards a tree trunk. And there, he smacked a fist against the tree. From what he heard, this kept wolves away- messed with their depth perception or something. Turns out it was a myth, though- that or the wolves here were behaving by different laws.

They wouldn't get him from behind, that much was for sure. As they closed in, he saw one to his left, one to his right, and three in front, with a couple extra wolves behind them- and some of their yellow eyes peeking from the vegetation.

"No, no, no!"

One of the wolves leapt at his hand, jaws wide open. He tried to punch it off, but it was too strong and he wasn't. As he turned his back, another muzzle clamped on the muscles of the back of his leg, sending unspeakable pain and horror throughout his body as he dropped to the ground. A dozen barks sounded all around him as he felt the hungry canines converge in his location and greedily sink their teeth in his body. Head, legs, arms, gut, every part of his body was being torn apart by hungry wolves, but he didn't feel most of them- he only felt the moist, warm teeth that tore at his tender flesh.

And he only felt them, while screaming, for the instant they were devouring him alive...


======


The taste of grass was a surprise. He spat out these blades, wondering why the hell had everything turned blue. It hit him a moment later that he wasn't where he was supposed to be... this obviously wasn't the university. So much green, so much brown with greenish tones... he stood up and tried to no avail to clear his head. There was just nothing familiar here- only blue, green, brown... he needed his glasses...

He fumbled down to the blue- it was grass? Why was the grass blue? He let the question fade out with a grunt.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

Feeling around, he finally found his glasses. He put them on, and squinted behind them for an instant. Around him, the world was a gigantic jungle- the likes of which couldn't be found anywhere within a dozen miles of the university. This made no sense- all he recalled were those last instants of the experiment- Dr. Greek had been distracted that day, that sample hadn't been properly analyzed, but even then it couldn't possibly have caused this result. Someone had to have taken advantage of him while he'd been knocked unconscious somehow... he checked his watch. It was still Monday, 11:33 AM. And now it was 11:34 AM.

He needed to get his bearings. First thing he did was taking his satellite phone- that very expensive thing would probably be something else than bragging rights now. He quickly...

...no signal!? That couldn't be!

Raising his gaze, he saw the culprit- that canopy. Diffraction phenomena and all that. He just needed the sky- and he'd find it. His eyes darted around for a sign of light- he finally found that light, somewhere in the distance, there was so much light it could only mean a clearing. If that didn't work, he'd see about climbing a tree.

Hastily he jogged towards the light, paying mind to not losing his glasses in the process. Those things had cost a fortune- and the environment wasn't exactly forgiving, either. Maybe they'd have survived the fall, but he wouldn't be able to find them afterwards. He looked around, trying to find any species of anything he recognized. Sadly, he wasn't a naturalist, he was a physicist.

A small clue of civilization made him grin. He found a vest much like his own hanging on a branch- a little dirty, though. Someone had been here.

On further inspection, it was his own vest! He removed his vest, and then pulled down that other one. Comparing the two of them together... same brand, same color, same size, same date, same everything. It was getting hard to attribute that to coincidence.

When he saw they had both matching mustard stains on the chest, his heart skipped a few beats. He checked their pockets- finding the same pen, too.

"What!?" he barked. Feeling something, something big stir not too far away from him, in the direction of the light, he immediately ran the other way until he was back where he had started.

It took him some time to realize they were the same piece, only a few days of filth apart. It was the same pen, too. He grimaced- realizing that maybe Dr. Greek's experiment had brought down unforeseen consequences on the two of them.

'Maybe I'm being duplicated?' he blinked. 'Maybe I'm a duplicate. Maybe...' he shook his head. 'This is...' he grinned. 'This is just a nightmare, isn't it?'

Much as he wanted to think that, it was getting less and less likely by the moment. He had to wonder what was Dr. Greek coping with now... or if he was even alive. Either way... this was, at least, cool. It was unique. And if he was correct, his other duplicates had been killed off. He had to make sure that didn't happen to the next... if there was a next duplicate, that is.

Well, it couldn't really hurt, could it?

He dug into his pockets and pulled out his business card.

ORD
OPTIC RESEARCH DEPARTMENT

PROF. FRANK V. HERB
frank.herb@phy.baun.edu

PHYSICS DEPARTMENT - BALTIMORE UNIVERSITY

Then he pulled out one of the pens, jotting down the coolest thing he'd done in his life.

-If I'm reading this, I've been here before. - He began. -At least twice. - The one that had clued him, and then one writing it right now. -I wonder what happened to me? - He scratched out the question mark. It was definitely his handwriting... now he had to make sure it was clearly a message from himself...

He opened his wallet with some reluctance and pulled out a five dollar bill. Grimacing again, he took the pen, and wrote over the bill...

"Check your wallet" he began. Then he circled the area in the corner...
DK 54622311 H

He looked around for something to use as a paperweight. There had to be...

A glint caught his attention from the corner of his eyes. He quickly strode up to the object and picked it up. It was smooth, faceted, and transparent white. And very, very shiny.

A large diamond!?

From what little he knew of diamonds this was probably a fake. No diamond that big just turned up in the jungle. Not once it was polished. Yeah, it had to be fake.

Oh, whatever- if he found a better paperweight he could retrace his steps and replace the diamond. But for now... he was forgetting something. He added a final addendum.

-I'll be using the vest to mark the spots where I die. - He grimaced. If his students could see him now they'd think he really was that out of touch with reality. Maybe he was going through a spurt of psychosis... well, if he did, all he lost was a business card, five dollars, and a little self-respect. And this was kind of cool, too, he tried to add for a lighter note. It didn't work.

Well, if he'd lost his vest over there, which meant that was the wrong direction. It was best not to go towards the light- he put there the vest he'd found and then turned the other way around. He hoped he'd made some progress. He took his vest in his hands, and wandered into the forest...

His progress found obstacle after obstacle. This jungle was thick, humid, and full of thorns. But specially, it was deep- and it was getting hard to see anything. He wondered for a moment if the best thing to do in a survival situation wasn't to stay still right where he'd been- probably it was. But if he was right, this was no ordinary survival situation...

He face palmed. He'd panicked. He'd done something sovereign stupid back there- and now he was lost. Duplicated? Had he lost his mind or something? Yeah, that must've been it- it wasn't his fault, he had just found himself in the middle of nowhere for no reason whatsoever. His steps slowed down as he quickly came to realize the futility of it all...

...and then he fell, the vest on his hands snagging on a branch and slipping from his fingers. Next thing he knew, he was in a pit- sitting over a huge leaf. The leaf quickly wrapped itself around him, like a giant carnivore plant.

For a moment, he was madly certain that he'd been replicated. It didn't last long- the possibility that he'd been copied was substituted quickly for the certainty that there was a leaf folding itself to wrap around him, it looked like a lily pad, only it didn't smell like lily pad. It had a sweet smell, but he could perceive an acrid, alien tinge that got him worried for some reason.

The liquid pooled around him, slowly but surely threatening to reach his nose. This was a really horrible way to die...


======


Oh, Lord, grass. Where was he? This wasn't university. And that taste in his mouth, he needed to know what had happened. Lord, this was scary, scary, scary. Last thing he remembered was Dr. Greek's experiment and then... why was everything blue!? Had he gone blind? Looking up, he saw different colors- he just didn't have his glasses on... without them he was almost blind.

He fumbled on the ground, trying to find them. The tall grass wasn't helping, and he didn't even know if they were around there, for all he knew, someone had tossed him here while he was unconscious. That must've been it- there was no way a laser beam could send him somewhere- or maybe his color perception had been screwed with because of the laser? Lasers could do that, maybe, but this looked too complex. He couldn't be perceiving green as blue, that was impossible. No, this was a silly idea, and he felt all the sillier for thinking of it. Normally he wouldn't even consider the possibility- what had gotten into him to even THINK of something that stupid!?

He still needed his glasses.

"I never fucking took them off, where the hell are they supposed to be!?"

Finally, his fumbling yielded fruit. He picked them up with shaky fingers and slid their legs over his ears, the crystal placed over his eyes fixing that little aberration of nature.

He stood up, a thorough grimace in his eyes. Looking down, he saw those blue grasses. Looking up, there were trees. Humongous trees, he wasn't sure there were trees that big. And looking back, there was a strange insect.

"Huh-eh?" he grimaced. That was one big insect, and it looked tan-colored. For a moment he thought he'd seen a...

The insect turned towards him, and then he saw it for but a moment. If he were to describe it, the word "fairy" would've been the first thing to come to his mind. A funny face came over his features as he stepped back.

None of that helped- the next thing he knew was that he was hanging; a moment ago he had felt dizzy, as if he'd been falling, and then he saw himself look straight-up at a woman's face. She was youthful, with a vibrant smile, eyes full of joy- and maybe around a hundred feet tall, holding him with two fingers by the waist. She quickly lapped him up- he yelled until he choked on gallons of slimy liquid and an unspeakable amount of fear and panic- he felt teeth, he felt teeth! He was in something's mouth, in HER mouth!

He scrambled as much as he could- this is to say that he barely scrambled at all. He couldn't form a coherent response now- he could only thrash around while choking, tossed from one side to another as the soft walls around him shifted and shifted, occasionally letting him feel moist bones that worried him so much.

Coughing, he slid down something. And then he found himself somewhere similar, but more peaceful. There was a wide space lined with flesh.

He could hazard an educated guess as to its purpose...


======


He spat a little grass from his mouth, grimacing at the bitter taste. Wondering for a moment why there was any grass here, he picked himself up, thinking back to the experiment. Merlin Greek, that dielectric. Teal-blue and red veins, it wasn't homogeneous- of course it wouldn't give a laser. He wouldn't have expected it to give anything at all. But none of that mattered now- what mattered now was that he needed to know where he was. This wasn't university.

He scrambled on the ground for a while, looking for his glasses. He was almost blind without them.

"They... they have to be there, somewhere..." he gasped.”I never took them off..."

Quickly enough he found them. He grabbed the legs, and pulled...

...strange.

His other hand came to assist him with the leg he'd pulled. Those were his glasses, no doubt about it. But as he felt them, there were four glasses and four legs... he untwined them together, and then put one of the pairs on.

It was his glasses. Begging the question of what was that other pair.

Looking from behind his glasses, it looked like his glasses.

"What the...?" Frank spat. He switched pairs.

Both had the same prescription, obviously. Strange- in his hands he had two identical pairs of glasses. And both were his'- even the designs on the legs were the same, the bridge was the same. How come there were two pairs of identical glasses? Glasses required a prescription, a specified visual distance, and were custom-made even then! This was impossible... but it couldn't be a nightmare, it felt too real and it was simply too alien to come from his mind.

He cleared his head.

"It's just glasses..." he told himself, ignoring the questions 'Why here? Why now? Why after the experiment!? Maybe someone's played a prank on me!? They must've spent quite a bit of money at that, too- those glasses cost a fortune.'

Looking around, he greedily pocketed one pair.

'Joke's on them. I've got a spare set now. Thanks guys, I'd give you back your set, but I don't know which is which anymore.'

He took his cell phone. The first order of business now was to find out where he was. He took his satellite phone- and then heard a woman scream. With a gasp, he turned around, and ran towards the source, into the jungle... hoping for sure that it wasn't something that could get him too! But he couldn't just abandon whoever he had heard...

Doing his best to avoid what obstacles he found, cursing as he stepped on one or two things that weren't too savory, he reminded himself of what was it he was after. Eventually, he found a place where, he guessed, the scream had come from. It looked like a rather open space, devoid of trees- their canopy nevertheless obscuring the cloudy sky completely.

He looked around.

"Hello?" "I heard something!" "Are you here!?"

No answer. The suspense started gripping his heart, as the foolishness of what he'd done caught up to him. This was bad...

"I just want to help!" Maybe he'd just imagined it?

Looking around, he heard a soft squelch come from above. Something dripped on his shoulder- he turned only slightly to see a syrupy, sticky liquid flow onto his shoulder. Instinctively he stayed still- then he looked up.

Then he raised his arms to parry something, ducking, using the worst possible reflex for that situation. The plant's maws clamped down on him, and yanked him back up into the canopy. He protested, feeling the syrupy juice soak into his skin... something wasn't right... carnivorous plants couldn't get that big... this was...

...he fainted...


======


Lucilya waited all morning on top of the branch. Her last meal had already long since been broken down, now she needed a meal. Frank should be there any minute now- why was the human late? It was already past noon, and she was starting to feel he wasn't worth the wait. Then again, this time around she could undress him; enjoy his flavor a lot more. She could squeeze some berries on him, for a better taste. She could've done any of a number of things the thought of which already made her insides gurgle in anticipation.

But Frank didn't come. The trampled grass where he'd appeared on many times was still trampled, but there was no sign of a human anywhere in the vicinity. She checked again and again; it didn't change anything. Frank wasn't there. And if her senses weren't deceiving her, there wasn't any sign he'd be.

She'd run out of Frank, then?

Well, that settled it, she thought with a smile. Now it was time to move on and go hunt something else. She dropped the plastic card she'd been hanging on to. It had been fun, but now it was over. All good things were, in time, she thought, as she flitted away from the small clearing with the trampled grass.

All good things were over one day, but new good things would come. And she'd be ready to enjoy them.


======


Please don't read this until you've read the rest of the story- I'd sooner you didn't read this light-hearted note until you've read the whole heavy-hearted story and felt it as is.

[sblock]Okay, now, if despair isn't your main interest, and you still read this despite yourself, congratulations! Of course, this is just a story. And to help you feel it as just a story, let's play a silly little game... this story comes with a complimentary puzzle!

You might have noticed the events in the story didn't line up perfectly! That's because it wasn't told in chronological order- a little resource to put you in Herb's shoes. Now, since it's not in the correct order, let's put it in the correct order! Herb, Lucilya and the dryad have left clues every day for you to figure it out! There's twelve days in total, so let's get to it! First person to put the days in the correct order (or defend that their order is as supported by evidence as any other) gets a free story/drawing request from... yours truly!

Also, it's a great palate cleanser if the despair is hanging too heavily on you! Are you crafty enough to put it back together? Am I good enough a writer to make it possible? Let's find out together! I've got a cheat sheet myself, but you have a challenge in your hands- if you accept the challenge, that is![/sblock]

Other than that, comments appreciated.

You devious madman.

I spent close to two hours trying to get this settled.

Lucilya ate Frank 3 times in a row, so her three days must be the last 3.

Story 12 (Out of Frank) is day 12

Story 2 is Day 11

Story 5 is Day 10

Story 4 is six days after Story 6, so it is Day 9

Story 3 is Day 8, the last day he found his own vest and wrote in it, as no others read "anything will be of use"

Story 6 is Day 3

Which makes Story 9 Day 2, with the mention of (someone ran by before) by the dryad

the rest is a mass of confusion and my head overheating.

On a side note, awesome story, made me think of the Twilight Zone, probably my favorite show of all time. Good grammar, spelling, ect.

I approve of this.

Well, you already know what I think of this. You may not consider your story that original, but nothing ever is completely, and this one comes close enough. Very cleverly done; a coherent story presented in a confusing yet structured way to line us up with the character's perspective. (If I get some time, I'll try and tackle your puzzle, but I'd rather avoid the headache right now. :p)

You've got Lucilya's character down well, too. Carefree, opportunistic... She approached poor Herb with curiosity, intrigued and pleased by the novelty of him, but did not spend too long puzzling it out before putting him to his "proper use".

All in all, quite a memorable story.

Ohh that's the endles eight in Felarya XD
Very original story here and, despite the repetion, very enjoyable to read

MrNobody13 wrote:

You devious madman.
I spent close to two hours trying to get this settled.
Lucilya ate Frank 3 times in a row, so her three days must be the last 3.
Story 12 (Out of Frank) is day 12
Story 2 is Day 11
Story 5 is Day 10
Story 4 is six days after Story 6, so it is Day 9
Story 3 is Day 8, the last day he found his own vest and wrote in it, as no others read "anything will be of use"
Story 6 is Day 3
Which makes Story 9 Day 2, with the mention of (someone ran by before) by the dryad
the rest is a mass of confusion and my head overheating.
On a side note, awesome story, made me think of the Twilight Zone, probably my favorite show of all time. Good grammar, spelling, ect.
I approve of this.

Happy to have been of entertainment. And yes, I have to be a devious madman- or else you guys would get bored.
Though... you're not completely right with the order of things. Looks like you lost track somewhere, or forgot to count one. Or maybe I counted wrong where did I put what? I'll check later.

Also, thanks, Frenchsnack. Memorable, you say? Heh! Maybe. Either way, I'm glad I got Lucilya right- she was perfect for this puzzle. Any other fairy, and Herb could've escaped my loop of insanity.

The endless eight? For Herb, maybe. For Lucilya, it was from getsuyoubi to kin' youbi.

_:.º_o/'-._ [I've lost my mind] The... great, great grand-shame!

I've done the graphs, and there's a total of four possible sequences... Damn, I shouldn't have allowed Story 10 that many degrees of freedom... but it just felt so RIGHT! As I keep searching for the clues I left, the number keeps narrowing down, but I can't tell if it's because I didn't make mistakes before or because I'm convincing myself that was the case. However, my final estimate is that there's TWO possible readings.

So, to be fair, I'll yield an art request to each indiividual who finds one the first.

Well, I better not give any hints, either.

OK, let’s see…

Part 1: Time: 11:34. Herb goes to the fairy pond and is eaten. Sees no sign of his predecessors.

Part 2: Eaten by Lucilya, who was waiting for him. Since she was waiting, it must be at least the third time she eats him at that spot. The events of part 5 indicate it must be at least the 4th time.

Part 3: Herb hears gunfire, runs away, finds his own bloodied wallet, with his note to himself (‘been here at least twice’), including the banknote; and his corpse (died 12:16, Thursday (other days are Mondays)). Writes additional note to himself (‘Don’t despair’).

Part 4: Time: 11:37. Eaten by a dryad.

Part 5: Lucilya eats him for the 3rd time. (Which means that Part 2 must come later.) She knows his name and has his driving licence.

Part 6: 11:33. Eaten by a dryad. Some indication that this isn’t his first arrival. May happen before part 4, if the skeleton in the stomach in part 4 is him.

Part 7: Eaten by Lucilya. Tells her his name for the first time. There are bones in her stomach, but no indication that they’re his.

Part 8: 11:35. Finds the note that he also finds in part 3. Finds two versions of his vest. Is killed by wolves, creating the corpse found in part 3.

Part 9: Sees his watch go from 11:33 to 11:34, as in part 6. Suggests the time is not a clue. Finds one version of his vest. Leaves himself the note he later finds in part 3. Finds a diamond. Leaves himself a vest which he then finds in part 8.

Part 10: Is eaten by Lucilya. No talking.

Part 11: Finds an extra pair of his glasses. When did he drop the other? Actually, he never picks them up in part 2… But 11 can’t come just after 2, otherwise Lucilya would be waiting. He never picks them up in part 7, either, and in that instance Lucilya might not be waiting for him the next day.

Part 12: Final part. Lucilya waits for him in vain.

So…

Lucilya first eats him in part 7 or 10. Probably 10, I’d say. She eats him for a third time in part 5, and for a fourth and final time in part 2. If we assume he appears once a day, then the last five parts must be 10, 7 (possibly followed by 11?), 5, 2, 12.

Part 3 happens after part 8, which happens after part 9.

I can’t recall him ever finding his “Don’t despair” note. Which suggests that Part 3 is the end of one sequence, and may be followed directly by the beginning of his Lucilya sequence.

Maybe 1 6 4 9 8 3 10 7 11 5 2 12 ?

Ah, I don’t know. :p

Frenchsnack, you got 5 out of 12 correct.

Augh... Well... I think I'll leave it at that.