Erin (Second Character)

BASICS
Name: Erin Johannsen
Race: Human
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Height: 5' 11"
Skin Tone: White, somewhat tanned
Hair Color: Blond
Eye Color: Brown

BIO
Erin was born in Sydney, Australia to a wealthy family, who spoiled and pampered her from an early age. She showed a natural talent for art and piano, which she was often praised for. By 15, she had grown into a talented and beautiful- but selfish and egotistical- young girl. The only thing missing, which her parents often questioned her about, was a boyfriend. Erin wondered why she'd never had one as well- there were plenty of boys at school who were interested in her, but she had no interest in any of them. She finally realized why while she and her friends were watching TV one day. As her friends swooned over the male leads of the soap opera they were watching, Erin found herself more interested in the girls on their arms.

At 16, she finally found herself someone; her name was Coraline. She was smart, pretty, fun, and shared Erin's orientation. The two began dating, and although it was rocky at times they managed it for about a year. That year was the most satisfying time of Erin's life; she had found someone she truly cared about, and the feeling was mutual. Until, one day at the beach, calamity; Coraline could take no more of Erin's selfishness. The two broke up. Erin, devastated and dumbstruck, wandered off into the city. She walked and walked through the concrete jungle, her mind clouded by anger and grief, until she suddenly found herself in an entirely different jungle. Erin, convinced this entire day was just a nightmare, kept walking.

She kept wandering for a while longer, thinking herself to be alone in a senseless dreamscape- until she was ambushed by the fairy, Anastasia. Anastasia, finding the girl pretty, opted to take her back to her lair instead of devouring her ("What a shame it would be to rob the world of such a radiant specimen!"). There, Erin was shrunken down and placed in a rodent cage the fairy had taken from a previous victim. It was the first time Erin tasted the bitter-tasting berries the fairy gave her to eat that she realized this was not a dream.

Anastasia kept Erin prisoner for roughly a year, treating the girl as a pet and a prized possession, showing her off to other fairies. During this time, Erin had little to do other than reflect on her life, what she might have done to deserve this- and she realized how selfish, how self-absorbed and egotistical and callous she had been all those years. Not that it mattered now; she had given up hope of ever escaping. This changed, however, when a group of explorers found Anastasia's lair while the fairy was away, found Erin, freed her, and escorted her to Negev. It was then that Erin, shaken and humbled, decided to turn over a new leaf; it was no longer all about her any more. She wanted to help people now. Her love of literature got her a job at a book shop in the Middle Tier, where she worked for many years until the previous owner left and she inherited it. One day, while delivering a tome to someone in the Higher Tier, she found an Inu girl wandering blank-faced and shell-shocked; this was Nalea. Remembering the oath she had taken, she took Nalea home and nursed her back to health. The two are now very close- although, while she's worried Nalea wouldn't return her feelings, she'd like to be more than friends with the Inu.

PERSONALITY
Erin has left her days of valuing her own comfort and convenience over anything or anyone else long behind her. While she can still be petty and selfish at times, she tries not to be. Because she had never known responsibility or accountability before she arrived in Felarya (at age 17, BTW), she is a bit childish and aloof. She still misses her family and friends back in Sydney and it was very hard working for a living; life in Negev was almost harder than being Anastasia's prisoner at first, but she's gotten used to it. She tries to be compassionate and patient as much as she can, and she is usually able to keep up at least a facade of good cheer. She tends to be quite emotional; Nalea tries to keep her grounded and objective, just like how Erin tries to get Nalea to smile more ("Have you ever seen yourself smile, Nalea? Once you have, you'll know why you should do it more.") Overall, she feels more fulfilled working for a living and taking responsibility for herself in Negev, as difficult as it was at first.

Erin takes great pride in her paintings, sketches, and wood-carvings, and not only decorates her home with them but also sells them in the market for a bit of extra money. She hasn't seen enough of Felarya to form an opinion of it, she's heard enough horror stories from adventurers to make her not want to see any more of it beyond the Isolon Eye's range. Curiosity has led her down to the slums outside the city where the hybrid races live, and she has found that she doesn't mind them. She actually very much enjoys visiting the Drunken Chilotaur for a drink every now and then. However, due to her experiences with Anastasia, both her imprisonment and the fairy's frequent attacks on the convoy taking her back to Negev in attempt to retake her captive, Erin harbors a fearful hatred of fairies.

APPEARANCE
Erin is tall and thin with soft, delicate features, a figure of litheness and grace, with shoulder-length curly golden hair and deep hazel eyes. She's well known in the Middle Tier of Negev for her alluring smile and the playful spark in her eye. She's fond of doing herself up with a tasteful hint of make-up and wearing brightly-colored dresses.

LIKES: Lazy summer days, literature, art, heavy metal, the occasional night at the Drunken Chilotaur
DISLIKES: Classical music, disorder, being alone, fairies, jellyfish ("They're like floating bags of hate! You know why they kill you when they touch you? It's not because of the poison- it's their concentrated hatred laying siege to the very fabric of your despised existence!")
SKILLS: Piano, painting, sketching, wood-carving

Here's my second character! What do you guys think? I realize Anastasia's sparing her life just because she's pretty might be a bit strange, but once I post Anastasia's profile, I think that detail will be sufficiently explained. I also know that I could expand on her experiences en route to Negev and in captivity, as well as her thoughts and feelings towards Negev, but those might be better left for the stories I'll write about her and Nalea.

So, what else could be expanded or improved here?

You are definately a keeper. Two good bios in a row now.

Overall, Erin seems like a fairly solid character.

A lot of people seem very hesitant to make an average character these days, since you have to rely on personality and story, instead of super-powers.

I like how she actually undergoes some significant character growth as well. The way she changes as a person seems believable, and seems like it will be an interesting story to read. I admit, I had a twinge of worry when it was revealed that she is a lesbian (since a great many people never handle that right, and the character becomes little more than a stereotype), but I have to admit that you seem to have handled it well. Its just another part of her as a person, and that is how something like that should be handled.

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I realize Anastasia's sparing her life just because she's pretty might be a bit strange, but once I post Anastasia's profile, I think that detail will be sufficiently explained.

Im sure it will be fine when you explain it. Fairies are wierd, and have a strange view of the world. Keeping a human as a pet doesn't seem unbelievable.

Overall, a pretty nice bio. Your stories seem like they are going to be a good read, if these bios are any indiciation.

This is a very solid bio that handles things well - making a unique character while not overpowered or unbelievably "special". You use examples from her life to give a better view of the character, not just arbitrarily, which is a good thing.

You definitely got the basics of good character creation. Hope you stick around here.

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A lot of people seem very hesitant to make an average character these days, since you have to rely on personality and story, instead of super-powers.

I whole-heartedly disagree. This is really only for newcomers who didn't grasp the ropes of character creation and balance. You can very easily make a character that rely on story and personality, yet is empowered. To rely entirely on superpowers would amount to "all action, no substance."

Again, thanks for the feedback, guys.

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I admit, I had a twinge of worry when it was revealed that she is a lesbian...

I was a bit iffy on whether or not I should have included that as a part of her character, because I was worried I'd be pegged as a pervert or something ("imma write bout this hawt lesbian lawl"), but I really am trying to make that only a small part of her as a person, like you said, that adds to the conflicts she undergoes in my stories.

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I whole-heartedly disagree. This is really only for newcomers who didn't grasp the ropes of character creation and balance. You can very easily make a character that rely on story and personality, yet is empowered.

This got me to thinking- I can easily see someone finding Erin and even Nalea to be bland or uninteresting characters because they DON'T have any crazy powers- I've kind of done the opposite and pushed power aside to focus more on story and character. But I can see how it could be important to balance those elements, something I'll be trying to do with Anastasia. Still, I feel compelled to ask, even though this isn't really the place do to it; does anyone find Erin or Nalea bland based on their profiles? I promise you they won't be in my stories, where it will really matter, but I am curious.

It's the personality that makes the character, not the skills, the powers, or their gimmick. But I was responsing to Cliff about being very hesitant to make average character since you can't rely on superpowers. This is completely false and people who rely on superpowers to make a character is the mark of a poor writer.