| Felaryan Rules to go by. | |
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Icalasari Seasoned adventurer
Posts : 163 Join date : 2008-01-04 Age : 32
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sat Mar 01, 2008 7:21 pm | |
| Rule #142: In Soviet Russia, road forks you. In Felarya, nothing forks you. It is more convenient to eat using ones fingers, after all
Rule #143: If you are a Heterosexual Male, Homosexual Female, or a Bisexual of either gender, avoid Female Predators
Rule #144: In fact, if you are ANY gender, avoid ANY predators
Rule #145: Sorry to tell all of you Final Fantasy fanatics this, but Phoenix Down will NOT help you here... Unless you want to come back as a partially digested skeleton
Rule #146: Remember Kids: It is NOT fun to poke the giant naga with a stick
Rule #147: If your race has too many idiots, send them to Felarya. The idiot population should shrink considerably after that
Rule #148: I will only say this once: even if you are an invincible human, you will still die in Felarya via being eaten
Rule #149: Voraphiliacs are not advised to come to Felarya
Rule #150: Genetically Modified Clones of Superbeings do not exist in Felarya, as, due to being superbeings, they know better**
Rule #151: Caves with huge white spikes make GREAT homes*
*Do not refer to Rule #77
**Pokemon fans will get this reference | |
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Pendragon Grand Mecha Enthusiast
Posts : 3229 Join date : 2007-12-09
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sat Mar 01, 2008 7:49 pm | |
| rule 152: Anything will eat you. ANYTHING. Even your fellow human companion.
rule 153: Offer sex to a predator before they eat you. You're screwed either way. Do the job right and you may be spared.
rule 154: Always carry a net with you when fairy hunting. It catches them much easier*
*do not refer to rule 77 | |
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Icalasari Seasoned adventurer
Posts : 163 Join date : 2008-01-04 Age : 32
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sat Mar 01, 2008 8:27 pm | |
| - Pendragon wrote:
- rule 153: Offer sex to a predator before they eat you. You're screwed either way. Do the job right and you may be spared.
Rule #155: If you are going to be screwed in Felarya, at least make it the sexual screwed | |
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Malahite Cog in the Machine
Posts : 2433 Join date : 2007-12-11 Location : Old World
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:43 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #156: "Ram 'em 'till they give up!" is only a viable military tactic for Predators. Or large masses of demi-humans in motor vehicles.
Felaryan Rule #157: If you find a lone human wandering around anywhere in Felarya, and they look calm, teleport away immediately. Don't stick around to talk, let curiosity get the best of you, etc. Just go. In fact, having a contingency spell that insta-teleports you when you see a lone, calm human would likely be a good idea. | |
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Shady Knight Lord of the Elements
Posts : 4580 Join date : 2008-01-20 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:54 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #158: Disregard Rule #157 if said spell teleports you randomly, you can't trust on luck here. | |
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Malahite Cog in the Machine
Posts : 2433 Join date : 2007-12-11 Location : Old World
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:58 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #158 footnote: This rule may be ignored if said human is also in possession of a glowing weapon, or some portion of the human's body is crackling with energy, emitting an eerie glow, etc. | |
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Blackangel720 Tasty morsel
Posts : 6 Join date : 2008-03-01 Age : 39 Location : Trying to get this #*(% portal to work
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 9:40 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #159: Don't go swimming. Period.
Felaryan Rule #160: If you must swim, make sure you bring at least one friend. | |
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Mentalguy Seasoned adventurer
Posts : 173 Join date : 2007-12-09 Age : 34 Location : Camp Johnson, NC
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:09 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #161: Be sure to alway's......Fuck it, You are going to get eaten no matter what you do. | |
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Googlememan Survivor
Posts : 806 Join date : 2008-03-03 Age : 30 Location : Drama-Art errr I mean Deviantart
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:10 pm | |
| Rule number#162 :If u ever enter Felarya shot your self in the head so u don't end up as a meal | |
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Pendragon Grand Mecha Enthusiast
Posts : 3229 Join date : 2007-12-09
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:11 pm | |
| rule 163: smoking infront of Anna is a great way to make friends with her.*
rule 164: making up rules to get Anna to eat people makes Crisis happy
*disregard rule 164 | |
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Silent_eric Moderator
Posts : 585 Join date : 2008-02-18 Age : 33 Location : Location Location
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:16 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #165: Wait thirty minutes before swimming, after eating. The last thing you need when trying to outswim Anko (HA) is to cramp up. Felaryan Rule #166: Wait thirty minutes before swimming, after being eaten. The water may be a bit acidic. | |
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Blackangel720 Tasty morsel
Posts : 6 Join date : 2008-03-01 Age : 39 Location : Trying to get this #*(% portal to work
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:31 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #167: Advise the group of random explorers assembled before you that the rivers are the fastest and safest way to reach their destination.*
* See rule #77 | |
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Silent_eric Moderator
Posts : 585 Join date : 2008-02-18 Age : 33 Location : Location Location
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:34 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #167: The rivers are the fastest and safest way to reach your destination. | |
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Malahite Cog in the Machine
Posts : 2433 Join date : 2007-12-11 Location : Old World
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Mon Mar 03, 2008 4:16 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #168: Catch Corprus. The diseases magical nature prevents Felaryan soil from curing you of such, while simple restoration potions can reduce the worst of the side effects. This, in turn, will also discourage Predators from eating you. After all, what Predator would want to eat what appears to be a corpse that's sat out in the sun too long? | |
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Blackangel720 Tasty morsel
Posts : 6 Join date : 2008-03-01 Age : 39 Location : Trying to get this #*(% portal to work
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 9:26 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #169: ASSUME NOTHING!
Felaryan Rule #170: Discount Rule #169 if in the presence of a Predator. Instead Assume the Position (Head between knees, lips firmly on ass) | |
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Silent_eric Moderator
Posts : 585 Join date : 2008-02-18 Age : 33 Location : Location Location
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 11:13 am | |
| You mean the Party Escort Submission Position? Speaking of which...
Felaryan Rule #171: There is a party in Crisis' mouth, and everyone's invited! | |
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Shady Knight Lord of the Elements
Posts : 4580 Join date : 2008-01-20 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 11:16 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #172: Have a flamethrower, cooked humans taste better than raw humans. | |
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Haar Great warrior
Posts : 459 Join date : 2008-02-19 Location : Behind you!
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 11:27 am | |
| - Sean Okotami wrote:
- Felaryan Rule #172: Have a flamethrower, cooked humans taste better than raw humans.
They do not! Er, so I've, um, heard. | |
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Shady Knight Lord of the Elements
Posts : 4580 Join date : 2008-01-20 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 11:31 am | |
| I used that in chapter 5, of course Anna would have killed Sean if he didn't have Lightning Mobility. | |
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Karbo Evil admin
Posts : 3812 Join date : 2007-12-08
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Tue Mar 04, 2008 12:52 pm | |
| - Silent_eric wrote:
Felaryan Rule #171: There is a party in Crisis' mouth, and everyone's invited! haha XD | |
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Blackangel720 Tasty morsel
Posts : 6 Join date : 2008-03-01 Age : 39 Location : Trying to get this #*(% portal to work
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Wed Mar 05, 2008 4:53 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #173: Felaryan Guide Rule #1: Make sure the group of explorers you are guiding includes at least one member with his/her head in the clouds.
Felaryan Rule #174: Felaryan Guide Rule #2: Make sure said group also has one gullible member as well.
Felaryan Rule #175: Felaryan Guide Rule #3: Befriend as many Predators as possible before becoming a Guide. (Groups of Would-Be Conquerors are good for this) | |
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Shady Knight Lord of the Elements
Posts : 4580 Join date : 2008-01-20 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:39 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #176: Don't rely on experience alone, expect the unexpected. | |
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Oldman40k2003 Moderator
Posts : 661 Join date : 2007-12-08
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:10 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #177: To most things out there, "delicious" is your middle name. | |
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Shady Knight Lord of the Elements
Posts : 4580 Join date : 2008-01-20 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Fri Mar 07, 2008 6:49 am | |
| Felaryan Rule #178: If it ain't broke, don't fix it. | |
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mangamastermind Temple scourge
Posts : 613 Join date : 2007-12-09
| Subject: Re: Felaryan Rules to go by. Fri Mar 07, 2008 1:19 pm | |
| Felaryan Rule #179- If it IS broke dont fix it. Keep it with you and if your captured, use it as a curreous artifact to bribe with a pred. | |
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