Ciel and Co. (Asuroth's Characters)

Yup it's another new character by a new person (fear for your life) that I was thinking of adding to my story that I am working on and first just wanted opinions/criticism on her to try to do this at least somewhat decently. That said feel free to hammer me and call out horribleness of ths character for possible fixing!

Name: Ciel
Age: 43
Sex: Female
Race: Bolas Dridder
Height: 67 feet
Hair: Dark green with some brown strands mixed in.
Eye Color: Golden Yellow
Skin: Light green
Abdomen: Light wooden brown with some patches of green

Appearance:

Ciel is of a lighter build of body but that’s not to say she appears weak, she just seems a bit small as a consequence of being a Bolas Dridder more suited for less direct confrontations. The most striking feature of Ciel would be her eyes, standing out in contrast to the rest of her green and earthy colors and can be hypnotic (or scary for those more prey sized) seeing her bright eyes staring from the trees. She keeps her dark green her short mainly because she sees it as a hindrance and annoying to take care of when it’s too long. The patches of green on her abdomen are somewhat leaf shaped but not a rigid leaf literally just on her, but more of a basic smoothed out shape instead.

Ciel can always be found carrying a small leather sack at her sides that she has pieced together using her dridder silk to hold together the leather skins made from hunting various other creatures in her travels. Apart from this she also usually wears some more crude loose fitting leather vest made with what she can get and dyes it green most of the time by crushing leaves to get the pigment into it to match her skin. While other dridders have been known to craft shirts or the like with their silk she prefers the leather as it stands up to the wear and tear of the jungle far longer and still isn’t too bulky. On rare occasions she can be found wearing more of her armor- it’s not much, just small strap on plates designed to protect her legs.

Background:

She was born and raised with her family in the Dridder Forest and as such was heavily influenced by Dridder culture. While young she often heard from some others she played with on their stance towards nagas and how they were inferior to Dridders- all of which grew to be mostly just very gloomy and boring for her hearing it over and over again. Instead she grew more fascinated with a different aspect of Dridder society- the glory of Dridder warriors. The stories of such praise given to these Dridders fueled her to want to be a part of such glory and sparred often with her peers to improve herself. Her parents didn’t much enjoy this though as having their daughter come home bruised a lot was not what they intended but grew to support her with time. She was quick to learn however that brute force wasn’t a defining feature for her as other Dridder species were usually physically stronger, and instead turned to using her silk as a weapon tying tools onto the end and making different weapons from it.

At age 31 when she had fully grown and trained for a long enough time to be confident enough of her abilities she decided to leave her home in the Dridder Forest. Saying farewell to her parents was harder than she imagined as they gave her a sack filled with her favorite tools and a few weapons to help her in the wild. If asked why she left her home her answer would be a simple one: “Boredom mostly.” If she wanted to do something big to have her name in a story of greatness that inspired her; it sure was not going to be back waiting at home and so she wandered to the Chidokai Forest to find something…she wasn’t sure what though. It would be here that she would find what she was looking for during a daily hunt for food; she came across a group of warriors from another dimension armed with only simple swords and arrows who would prove to be no match for her. What caught her by surprise though was the ferocity and valor they showed; doing everything they could to protect their brothers and sisters in battle against impossible odds. Such determined warrior’s spirits reminded her of the stories that inspired her and she let them live, helping them as she could to reach Negav safely.

This moment changed her life, if even beings as small as these humans could hold such bravery, then who knows what other beings in Felarya would be like. Now she makes her home mainly in the Chidokai Forest but often wanders away long distances hoping to catch a glimpse of others like the legends she used to hear of as a child. She sometimes visits her family back in the Dridder Forest on occasion as she does not live too far off from them still.

Notable abilities:

Aside from the race specific abilities to handle her Dridder silk effectively, she also makes use of special tools from her parents that she ties to her silk to use. One of her favorites is to tie a hook on the end of her silk and go fishing; where she gets the bait though is another story! Aside from convenient tools such as that she also uses a few weapons in the same manor- namely tying a large metal ball onto the silk to use as a flail instead to knock out larger and more dangerous creatures. Her fighting skills are more trained than most wild predators having actually sparred and practiced with weapons growing up but she is not a super hero or anything; just a decent fighter with or without weapons winning and losing a fair amount back in the Dridder Forest as she grew up. When fighting she usually leaps between trees pelting her opponent with the different weapons she ties onto her silk and wearing them down trying to stay out of reach.

Personality:

Ciel is fairly adventurous and often gets into trouble with some local predators when she explores due to crossing so many territories…not everyone enjoys a new giant predator romping around their home. She usually won’t try to fight some other predator she annoys by crossing its territory unless they annoy or anger her enough. When stumbling into another predator like this she usually will try to just apologize and be on her way without causing too much trouble.

Ever since her run in with the humans in the Chidokai Forest she never takes things for face value; she’s come to hope that more creatures of Felarya may show the promise that small group of humans had. She may not like to pick fights with others for no reason but she does enjoy a good sparring more than anything if she gets a chance to. Her favorite method to relax however is fishing up in the trees with her tools by the river. She is very prideful of her abilities and is easily offended and angered if someone mocks either her or the tools her parents gave her. Doing this usually doesn’t end well as she tends to hold grudges for a long time if you offend her.

Aside from her adventuring she is very cautious, while living in the Dridder Forest and hearing the many stories and being taught by her parents of the dangers of Felarya she tries to make sure it is safe before approaching another predator. This makes it rather unsettling for a first meeting usually as she seemingly stalks her possible new friend from hiding in the trees with those golden eyes staring down at them…making them feel like they are being hunted almost. This habit of scaring off her possible friends outside of Dridders has made rather attached to the ones she does make hoping to learn more about them and possibly any legends they may have. Getting past her cautiousness the friends she does make find her to be very curious; she likes to know everything about everything which leads her to asking a lot of questions for her new friends. Aside from this she enjoys being helpful to those she knows, making them some crude tools or sometimes clothes with her silk.

Hunting habits:

She hunts by three main methods, the first being the classic Bolas Dridder method of hiding up in the trees and catching her prey with a ball of sticky silk stuck on the end of a long line. The second method being setting up thinner webs of silk throughout a section of the Chidokai Forest and trying to make use of the Jaykay birds starting up a lot of noise to confuse her prey to have them run in fear into her traps. This method is still a work in progress for her though as the annoying birds will spoil her own trap half the time as is anyways with their chattering before the prey is in the right spot or the stupid birds get caught up in it giving it away. The last being literally fishing as mentioned before, she normally prefers small sized prey and small mermaids are at the top of the list! Bait is rather hard to come by to attract smaller mermaids though so it is not often she gets to fish. Finally yes, she does like to swallow her prey whole like many others for the smaller variety.

If she needs to though she will hunt larger fauna but avoids more equal sized or larger beings due to their difficulty; these are only hunted rarely and when she does she makes use of the whole creature in supplying some more leather for later- taking out this kind of prey involves using the flail method earlier to knock it out and then finish it off.

How to Avoid Being Eaten:

Step one: hope she isn’t really hungry or you don’t got much of a chance at first as is…when hunting her mind is on food so when she catches something she doesn’t toy with it much at all but rather just gets it to eat.

Step two: don’t beg or run away, unless you are absolutely certain you can make it. Begging won’t do much, nearly every single prey species tries it and she’s rather used to it and running away just annoys her having to take you down and then eat you- she does not enjoy the chase of the hunt as some others do.

Step three: as crazy as it sounds your best bet is to put up as best a fight as you can- she has a great respect for those who fight bravely against impossible odds from all the stories she has heard. This doesn’t just mean you put up a lame fight and get spared; you have to work for it! As long as you aren’t just flailing around and putting up a good fight she might just let you off the hook after winning out of respect. This courtesy doesn’t extend to bounty hunters or bandits or the like though, she understands they aren’t out there fighting for honor but rather just for their own hides most of the time. Being able to supply her with good fishing bait for smaller mermaids or knowing a good fishing spot would also be a plus.

Hu, to be perfectly frank I think you got a pretty good character here. She’s interesting, she’s clever, she’s a tad harsh but not annoyingly so. She’s a warrior but a realistic one. She’s is tough but not invincible. Her methods of hunting are actually rather smart, and the fact that you recognize her Dridder origins without going over the top with racism is refreshing and well played. This is the kind of Dridder character I wish we would see more often. A very realistic and even likable character. Very good work Asuroth, I am interested to see what you do with her.

Sorry to disappoint you, but this is a genuinely balanced, well thought out and honestly good character.

There's a detailed but not unnecessarily contrived backstory. She has a developed personality, a good deal of quirks and generally a high level of potential. It's the kind of character I LIKE to see in a story. Not a designated hero, not a designated villain, but a genuinely solid character.

Amen with the two above. I would LOVE to see her in a story now. She's like a breath of fresh air after the rainstorm.

Good job, Asuroth!

Well then consider me happily disappointed, I was afraid I was striving for trying too many things that could come out awkward all meshed together; I am very happy to see she is being well recieved. Now you have me worried to try to keep up the pace with trying to make a good story to go with her. Thank you again for the support!

I also am here to disappoint, you made a good character, now if you wanted to make a SUPER SPEICAL AWESOME character they have to be a complete insert, but SUPER BETTER and I'm afraid they'd have to be a naga, everyone knows dridders aren't nice people!

Oh and rainbow colored, they have to look like a cloud barfed rainbows on em

they also have to be loved by all, thats a must OH and they have to have a katana =D


SO since you didn't meet ANY of these I'm afraid your character is good, well balanced, and intresting ^^

I take my hat and bow before you. You just made a very complete and interesting character here.

I'm really looking forward to seeing this character develop even further in stories.

Everyone has already said how good this character is and how balanced etc...
So I won't repeat what they said.
Congrats on making such a good character and I agree with L'Ryn, seeing this character in a story would be great!

As has already been said, this is an interesting and well thought-out character. It would be great to see her developed in stories. Well done.

I agree it's a balanced and well thought out bio ^_^
I especially found the part with the tools / silk interesting and original

Been a while and I got to writing a bio for the mantoid introduced in my stories. So changed title name and here's the bio- feedback always welcome to improve myself at this!

Name: Liora
Age: 68
Sex: Female
Race: Mantoid
Height: 74 feet
Hair: Long Dark Brown
Eye Color: Dark Green
Skin: Light brown
Abdomen: Dark Green

Appearance:

Liora is a little bit of a stronger looking woman for her size, as a result of often relying on her quick speed and strength in her hunts and less subtle approaches. Her most notable features would likely be the characteristic arm spines as a mantoid- she has a set of three spines running down the length of each inner forearm. The spines are made of her bone so the semi bleached color after being exposed to light for so long make them stand out against the rest of her darker colors; something she has to be careful of and keeps her hair long to conceal them when under it when hiding.

Background:

Liora used to live with her family near the northern borders of the Dridder Forest close to the Ascarlin Mountains; living off the humans who would stray too far from the protected mines and sometimes the inhabitants of the forest nearby. Soon after she was born though her mother took her family east away from the Dridder Forest and up north across the swamplands to the borders of the Chidokai- preying on some inhabitants of the Dridder Forest garnered unwanted attention to the mom who migrated to protect her family. Dragging a large young family of well over 30 hatchlings is dangerous and hard to keep track of though and Liora was separated from the rest of her family here; she has no idea where her mother continued off to.

What little she learned from her mom allowed her to survive for a little over a week scavenging and hiding; before finding Goro and falling out of the tree next to him in shock-which he thankfully caught her before she hit the ground. Being caught by such a giant being scared her so much she just straight passed out on sight! When she awoke she found herself on one of the tree’s giant roots with some fruits nearby but she couldn’t see the treant which had caught her anymore when she climbed on it. Over time she wandered around and scavenged more hoping to find her mom again with no luck and would return to the tree every so often for shelter-usually waking up to find more fruits around near her. Eventually she worked up the courage to call out to the tree, calling it her grandpa with no clue what else to call it by, to which he revealed himself again. Since then she has lived with the old treant in the southern portion of the Chidokai forest with him watching over and protecting her. Not exactly being a hunter himself he could not teach her much in the way of hunting, nor wanted to for that matter, but instead offered shelter and some old tips of avoiding some of the dangers in the jungles. She tried to track down her mother later off near where she was born as well at one point with no luck before returning.

Notable abilities:

Her primary abilities are just relying on her speed and strength, along with some natural camouflage in the way her body is colored to blend in with her environment. One sense in particular she has developed is her sense of sight- honing in on her strong eyesight she tries to take notice of any small changes that occur, whether it be a very slightly rustling bush or watching the movements on another’s body to try to predict their actions better. She has two large retractable wrist spines that she relies on as she has no venom or magical abilities; needless to say it’s very deadly if she ambushes her prey with these. She can move in very fast bursts of speed but cannot sustain it for very long, nor is she able to climb very well- she prefers instead to jump from branch to branch than climb a tree.

Personality:

Liora is a very determined girl to show she can be perfectly fine on her own at her age, but at the same time can be very childish about it. Yes, even at 68 years of age she STILL acts somewhat childish- I blame the healing properties of the soil for keeping her young! Having Goro constantly try to care for her has made her very unwilling to accept any kind of assistance. That’s not to say she doesn’t appreciate it- she’s just very reluctant about it having people take care of her. If she gets a chance though she jumps at it to put someone else in her debt; she loves to brag and is prideful of her abilities. She may not show it much, and be very grumpy about it when around him, but she really does love Goro deeply as a parent for taking care of her and being the only family she has.

Her attitude towards visitors to her territory varies a lot on how she’s feeling at any particular time, and also a lot on if she is hungry or not. She particularly makes an exception for being friendly to chilotaurs though- a good portion of the ones she has come in contact with have been rather lively and their nomadic alone lifestyle appeals to her. Almost always overconfident of her own abilities, she doesn’t beat around the bush to confront visitors. She likes to act like a know it all of her territory when she does get visitors that she doesn’t decide to think of as food and will poke fun at them occasionally.

Hunting habits:

Nearly all of her hunting habits are self taught and instinctual so they are fairly crude, mostly just hiding in spots she thinks will conceal herself well enough before springing a quick ambush. She is not very picky on what she eats and if it is edible it is fair game regardless of size; that is unless said thing is monstrously huge to which she would probably just keep on hiding and stay away from it. If it is somewhat larger prey she usually will choose to just ambush it and stab something vital with one of her arm spines and then chow down with her sharp fangs. She can get tired of waiting though and sometimes just outright confronts them instead. Smaller neko and human sized prey she still refuses to fully accept the dangers they can bring against the advice of Goro and uses less tact to charge in and get what she wants- resulting in occasions of getting a hard lesson when dealing with magi and the like.

How to Avoid Being Eaten:

Once again the best bets are just don’t be around when there is a hungry predator about! Really there is not much that can be done if she is ambushing her prey as it tends to end fast one way or the other. If you’re unlucky enough to be where she is but yet lucky enough to not have been ambushed: climb something really fast to buy some time and maybe try to flatter her. Being able to put her in your debt for something else is the most surefire bet though, but she will be angry and grumble about it trying to even the score.