So, when's the communication going to start?

There is one extremely troubling trend I have noticed before the recent drama, through it, and it is still present now in the post-drama awkward period. There is a total lack of communication between a number of community members, and even more troubling, there seems to be a willingness to let it continue.

It has been over three weeks since the clusterfuck of misunderstandings that occured over a rushed, but otherwise good-intentioned, letter to Karbo from 20+ members of the Felarya community. Bad words were said, people were accused of evil things, drama-whores came in and tried to inflame things to make everything worse, friends were at eachother's throats, people were banned and de-modded...and then silence. The Since the incident, there has be ZERO attempts to come together, have a mature discussion, and perhaps move on.

It isn't like it is hard to get in touch with other community members either. Myself, AJ, Jeatte, Aisu, Cauldron, Darkstorm and many, many others are almost always on MSN, and we're often in the Felarya ventrillo server that Chuck keeps going for the community. What I haven't seen, and what troubles me the most, are the people from the other side of the debate. Karbo has mostly withdrawn from people he has been friends with for ages, and Frenchsnack continues to remain distant and not talking to anyone outside of his usual circle of friends. I need to give credit here to Timing, who has been the most talkative by far. He's actually been in the chatbox, and from what I understand, has had some contact with Anime-Junkie on MSN.

What it seems like to me, is that the people who feel they were wronged are clumping together and withdrawing from those who they feel have wronged them...all while hoping that if they just ignore all of this, it may go away or correct itself. All that is doing is encouraging the creation of factions and cliques. All it does is make it seem more like there are two groups at odds with eachother, and promotes more hostile actions. Look at the recent shitstorm Krisexy riled up. Look at her comments. It is pretty clear that she feels that "her side" won, and that not only are the other people involved all wrong, but they don't deserve to be a part of the community. This is the kind of thinking that not only shouldn't be tolerated, but she be actively prevented.

Why aren't we talking with eachother? Why aren't we trying to settle all this like adults? Why is there such a silence between people who were once close friends? Why are people who were already distant from the community not making any efforts to get to know everyone better? Why? Why? Why?

It basically is devolving to "I don't like what these guys have to say, so Im just going to totally ignore them." That is the kind of thinking that will tear this community apart. That is the one SINGLE problem most of us have been speaking out against for quite some time. It is easy to say terrible things about people when you don't know them. If we all start talking to eachother, maybe, just maybe, we can all start treating eachother civilly. NO ONE here wants to see this community go down, NO ONE here has any bad intentions for it, NO ONE here wants to steal Felarya or change it completely. The fact is, everone involved meant well. Everyone had some good points...but we all handled the situation extremely poorly. We all slung shit, and we all got some on us. It is going to take all of us to set this right.

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-------------------------- Everything past this line can be applied to the community as a whole, please do not TL;DR this ---------------------------------
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We are not just a bunch of strangers writing about giant animal-people, monsters and magic. We are peers in a grand project to expand on and develop a truly interesting and unique sci-fi/fantasy setting. We owe it not just to ourselves, but to the community and to the setting itself to be civil with eachother...and that can ONLY happen if we are all on speaking terms.

The chatbox is one option, but it isn't perfect and the 5 minute idle-kick has always been annoying. Still, I encourage people to use the chatbox more. If you see someone in there, pop in to say hi and try to strike up a good conversation.

For more private talks, most of us have MSN, and if you want to be able to connect to community members more, you should consider downloading it. People's MSN information is displayed right under their forum posts. We should all make a more active effort to not only add eachother on MSN, but to talk to one another more often.

Honestly, one of the most fun places to hang out, from my experience, is the Felarya ventrillo server that Chuck runs. There is usually someone in here, usually several someones. It lets you hear people's voices and get to know them as people...not just faceless avatars spewing lines of text. We are ALL people on the other side of our screens. I think that sometimes that can be possible to overlook online. You don't even need to voice-chat to be on Ventrillo. It has a text-chat function, and quite a few people use it. Slimetoad and Vaderaz (Atlas) are on there quite often, and (whether its because english isn't their first language, or they just don't have a headset) they use the text-chat...and they do just fine. They're right there, getting to know their fellow Felaryans better, and participating in not only discussions about Felarya, but all the other random stuff we talk about. I have had a lot of great talks, and a lot of laughs in the Ventrillo. It really is a very fun and welcoming place.

http://www.ventrilo.com/download.php <-- Ventrillo download

Hostname or IP: felarya.clanvent.com
Port: 8878

There is no password. All you need to do is download vent and enter the server info.

See? Even Massumi thinks the Ventrillo is awesome =D ...and tasty, apparently.

Come on people. If we don't make an active effort to get to know eachother better, to talk more, to treat eachother with the respect and calmness that other human beings deserve, then this is never going to get better. The only way to break up factions, to dissolve camps, to expand your circle of friends is to meet more people and make MORE friends. The only way to put an end to the minunderstandings and misconceptions is to shatter the barriers that seperate us, and to become a friendlier, more unified Felaryan communinty.

This is not just me begging everyone to work to put the drama behind us, this is me begging any other community members that may be reading this to take it to heart. I've been here for two and a half years, and others have been here longer. I care about this community and its members. I just want us to be friends, or at least to get along.

Today is March 8th. Consider this my birthday wish.

I wasn't there for the letter business, hadn't joined yet. But I'll check out the ventrillo, no one ever seems to be on the chatbox when I'm online unless I happen to be on at 1 in the morning (I have GMT).

I downloaded ventrillo but when i try to connect i get this 'Connected to server but unable to authenticate your login name and password.'

thejackle123 wrote:

I downloaded ventrillo but when i try to connect i get this 'Connected to server but unable to authenticate your login name and password.'

Did you remember to set a username? When you start up vent, the section above where you entered the server info is where you set a username. If you still can't figure it out, and they don't see this and help you themselves, Mac, Anime-Junkie and Claire (that's chuck's forum name) are used to helping people get on. They know vent better than I do.

Okay Cliff. For your Birthday.

I'm already on Vent, but on a private scale I admit I've been bitter against parts of the community after the letter got its response and the reactions that were made to that response. More so I let the "drama-whores" you mention get to me on a personal level and make me want to withdraw more. I felt that there was inherent unfairness being perpetrated intentionally.

But I'm done. So I'm willing to converse. I'm willing to apologize to anyone I offended. I miss Karbo and would like to see him re-connect with the community.

You can find me on vent or MSN.

Thanks, got it working

I like this idea. The more we get to know eachother, the better off we'll be. We need to learn to tolerate even people who say they're mean to everyone, like CauldronBorn. All for civility, and civility for all! And yes, please, if you see me in the chatbox, do come say hello. I promise to be very polite and kind to you, so there's no need to worry. ^_^

If I took part of the silence that was mainly because I wanted to avoid doing something that might fan the flames, just wait until things had cooled down before seeing what could be done. And after seeing how quick it went back to jumping at each other's throats, I wasn't sure of how to react..

I might be pretty new to the community, and may not be doing much for it, but I'm ready to do whatever it takes if it helps setting things right. This is a really amazing community, I've made some great friends here and I've been treated very well since the beginning. I would hate to suddenly see all this crumbling down from a bunch of misunderstandings and related bullshit


....Which also reminds me i should get on ventrilo more often .x.

I will try to get the download but finding a Mic is going to be hard. but i will try

No masumi, no! vent isn't made of neko girls! Don't eat it! >.<

neko-pet wrote:

No masumi, no! vent isn't made of neko girls! Don't eat it! >.<

But it is filled with humans

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I will try to get the download but finding a Mic is going to be hard. but i will try

A mic is not required, but is good to have.

true true XD if she's not careful she might eat her creator though

neko-pet wrote:

true true XD if she's not careful she might eat her creator though

I thought characters did that all the time.

ZionAtriedes wrote:

neko-pet wrote:

true true XD if she's not careful she might eat her creator though

I thought characters did that all the time.

Really? I thought they ate other characters' creators. I'd feel awkward if my characters ate me XD

Erm I don't feel I'm "cut from the community" ^^;
I have been taking a little pause on chatting but I respond to comments and I'm reachable just as usual by message here on the forum or on DA.
People just have to send me a note or PM and I'll reply as usually... and I receive as much of them as normal.

Me I feel there has been inherent unfairness as well and I have been pretty irked by some comments and accusations lately. However I do agree there is a problem of communication, that many things are based on misunderstanding, and I'm all for mending things. And to do that, there is no better way than heartfelt apologies. Thus I'm renewing once again mine for having reacted too strongly to all this, and to Anime Junkie especially for having accused him wrongly.

As for characters eating their creators, well Crisis never tried but I can't tell the same for Menyssan or Anko though

Karbo wrote:

As for characters eating their creators, well Crisis never tried but I can't tell the same for Menyssan or Anko though

Menyssan is no surprise as she'd eat the entire residence of hell if she could....granted they're not her friends and fellow succubi....As for Anko, I'd expect her to give her creator a little bit more respect. You are after all like her father. Shame on you Anko! XD

hahaha Anko probably doesn't know this word XD

Karbo wrote:

hahaha Anko probably doesn't know this word XD

I guess I'll just have to curse her so that any humans, elves or nekos she eats tastes like dirt for a week...no that would probably get her to come after me...last thing I need is to be dealing with a mad anko.

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Erm I don't feel I'm "cut from the community" ^^;
I have been taking a little pause on chatting but I respond to comments and I'm reachable just as usual by message here on the forum or on DA.
People just have to send me a note or PM and I'll reply as usually... and I receive as much of them as normal.

Ahh, that is good to hear then. I know I wasn't the only one that was getting concerned about that. With all of the harsh words and high emotions that occured during the drama, and then seeing so little of you afterwards...there were a few of us that were concerned permanent damage may have been done to our friendships and that you just didn't want anything to do with us.

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However I do agree there is a problem of communication, that many things are based on misunderstanding, and I'm all for mending things.

Yeah, I think that is something we can all agree on. I just hope that, if we all start communicating more, such huge misunderstands won't happen again. The best way to stop misunderstandings is to try and get to know, and understand, other people.

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And to do that, there is no better way than heartfelt apologies. Thus I'm renewing once again mine for having reacted too strongly to all this, and to Anime Junkie especially for having accused him wrongly.

I apologize for the harsh words and yelling I've been throwing around lately. I really DID have good intentions, but how I handled things was completely wrong.

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As for characters eating their creators, well Crisis never tried but I can't tell the same for Menyssan or Anko though

That's the good thing about Fiona. I don't have to worry about any of that =P Although, pouncing on the tails of other giant ladies has gotten me a few close calls.

rcs619 wrote:

That's the good thing about Fiona. I don't have to worry about any of that =P Although, pouncing on the tails of other giant ladies has gotten me a few close calls.

lol, why would you pounce on the tails of giant ladies? But yeah, Trixy has that good attribute too...she'd only question my ears off. XD

Good to see more attempts at spreading communications, I know I tend to stay in my own corner for the most part but I talk when talked to...and I'll try to go on vent from time to time heh. My msn is freely open always, and I'm pretty much always on when I'm not at work . Makes me smile seeing the good intentions around and everyone wanting to get along more.

Ahh predators eating their creators...I think I'd only be safe from Goro, and that's only because pretty much everyone is heh XD. Liora definitely wouldn't have a second thought of doing such a thing...ungrateful I tells ya.

Asuroth wrote:

Ahh predators eating their creators...I think I'd only be safe from Goro, and that's only because pretty much everyone is heh XD. Liora definitely wouldn't have a second thought of doing such a thing...ungrateful I tells ya.

You should get a shock collar for her...and no, not the one from the man with a gas mask and a trench coat...stay far away from him =P

Now for those who have not been to the vent, sure we can be a bit silly or weird, but were generally friendly and we really do try to invite new people on.
oh dear lord I can only hope Soinee never actually would get to meet me, considering I am ultimately responsible for her suffering, I would be soooo dead. The others would be much less of a threat I think, heck I would love to meet Neia.

For me my fellow comrads I have Been Makeing A great deal of questions in Q&A in regaurds to certian aspects, so Im happy that I am communicating, even par taking in the chat box. Though more answers from different people on Q&A would be nice so i can get as much as a complete understanding as i can.

asaenvolk wrote:

oh dear lord I can only hope Soinee never actually would get to meet me, considering I am ultimately responsible for her suffering, I would be soooo dead.

rofl I guess you could say that. You are the one that created her and her life. =P